


Looking After This Little Fish

by fanfiction_fanfriction



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bullying, F/M, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Jacking off, M/M, Party, Past Child Abuse, Past Drug Use, Self Harm, Smut, Swearing, Underage Drinking, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-05-24
Packaged: 2018-01-15 12:21:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 57,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1304722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfiction_fanfriction/pseuds/fanfiction_fanfriction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Middle of the year and a new school, that was a common theme for Joel. Starting out at C.B Academy, the only school he hasn’t been kicked out that’s near his group home. It’s his last year and all he wants to do it get out of here and never thinks bout high school again, that’s until he meets Ray, then he doesn’t want to leave so much anymore. He gets into a whole new world with new people and sometimes that’s not always a good thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to C.B Academy

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my friend , ScreamingPies for helping me edit, your help meant the world to me. Thank you to everyone who reads this, I hope you enjoy it and keep posted for new chapters.

It was the middle of the year and here he was at new school; a common theme for Joel Heyman.   
He always seemed to get into some sort of trouble or another and have to start fresh, half way through the school year. It was one of the main reasons he tended to stay away from people, just incase he ended up having to say goodbye, again.   
He hated to goodbyes.   
Memories of the goodbyes a younger boy spoke to his dad before he left, walking out on him and his mom forever. The years later, a similar farewell sticking to Joel’s throat when it was his mother’s turn to go, her sickness forcing him to say goodbye again.   
Joel had been put into a care home soon after, never wanting to get too close to anyone at school or in the close knit house. He had feared having to say goodbye again, creating relationships that would only be severed, losing those around him again.   
Eventually, he did make some friends, the household’s unwavering determination to break Joel’s chilling defense winning in the end.   
The home is the only place where Joel doesn’t have to worry about saying goodbye to anyone, ever. At least not anymore. Not since Joel got old enough to realize that he although was going to be without parents for the rest of his life, it didn’t mean he couldn’t have anyone else.   
There’s Geoff, a skinny guy with dark locks, half-lidded eyes and a sleepy grin, the teen just recently starting to collect tattoos along his right arm, similar to the ones he used to draw on his arms with pen each and every day in middle school, driving his teachers insane.   
Geoff was the first guy Joel had ever really called a ‘friend’. As soon as he arrived at the group home, Geoff was the first to begin cracking at Joel’s shell.   
Another friend being Gus, who at the beginning, Joel was actually pretty afraid to go anywhere near with his icy glares and spiteful attitude, later proving that he was only just be as grumpy as Joel was, and they soon bonded over how grumpy both of them were.   
Michael, who everyone just called ‘Burnie’, because let’s face it, there are already too many Michaels in the world. He was more of a joker and had helped Geoff in bringing Joel out of his state of, in Burnie’s words, ‘being a dickward’, attending the school that Joel had just been transferred to.   
Finally, Kara, the only girl in the house, having her own room at the back of the house. She constantly makes fun of the other guys for having to share a room together, she had been given her own room near the beginning of them being put together, just incase the other guys ever tried to pull anything, but she knew they wouldn’t, and besides, if they did she could easily beat them black and blue.   
The five live under the care of their two carers. Matt, who they jokily nickname ‘Sarge’ for making sure the group know their place and Kathleen, nicknamed ‘Tex’ for her fiery Texas spirit.   
They live in a house just small enough for the group to live comfortably, located near several schools, and to Joel, it is more of a home than any of the houses he had resided in before.  
-  
Joel knew it. As soon as he stepped foot into the new grounds of C.B Academy, people are already afraid of him, their eyes flitting to the ground at any eye contact he made. Maybe it was that Joel was in grade twelve, maybe it was the hard expression he always wears on his face and the way he towers over most of the other students in his grade or maybe even because they’ve heard things from other schools.   
Still, it doesn’t bother Joel that much, he just wants to turn eighteen, get his record wiped and pass high school so he’ll get into an acting school and never have to think about every high school he’s been to ever again.   
Joel and his friends were setting off to California by the end of the year (if all of them managed to reach graduation, that is) and hopefully start something there, but Joel has a feeling that they’re all just going to end up still in Austin, so Joel’s been applying secretly for acting schools around the area, just in case.  
Joel walks the halls, concentrating on the new schedule in hand, looking down at the ink on the page rather than up at his surroundings.   
Joel feels someone bump into him, knocking him off his balance. He grabs the side of a locker for support and shoots an automatic glare at the person who pushed into him.  
Expecting a high school jock with a cocky attitude and a letterman jacket to prove his status and attitude, he finds himself looking down a scared looking, dark-skinned kid. Thick, chunky glasses sit on his nose, dark hair mopped on his head.  
“Ah- Shit... Sorry.” The kid sounds nervous, fear radiating from his face as he clutches to a strap on his bag.  
Joel stays silent a moment before replying. “Its no problem.”  
The younger continues to look up at Joel with wide, dark brown eyes before dashing away down the hall, head down.  
Joel keeps looking in the kid’s direction for a moment before looking back down at his schedule, trying to finding his way once again. He smiled to himself, damn, that kid really was cute as hell. Cuter than any other guy at any of the other schools he had the pleasure of attending.  
The raven haired teen sighed, time to get to class.  
-  
The first part of the day drags, math boring and science making Joel want to pour the acid all over his body instead of in the test tube.   
Lunch comes by and Joel suddenly realises he has nothing in his pockets or his bag for lunch. Cursing himself for forgetting it at the home for yet another time he starts to walk to the washroom, deciding to stop their quickly before trying to find Burnie, so he's at least not alone during the lunch hour.   
Joel turns around a corner, expecting an empty hallway but being met, once again, by the boy from before. However, this time he was being held with his arms behind his back by another, backpack and contents strung across the floor, whilst a second boy stood in front the restrained boy, inflicting punches to his chest and stomach, getting in the smaller boy’s bruised face.  
“Please- you can have my money- just let go!” The boy yells pathetically, squirming.  
As Joel got closer he could see the tears streaming down his face in from the torment and humiliation.  
“Shut it, you illegal immigrant.” The attacker growls, landing another punch that makes smaller boy wheeze out in pain.  
“You're lucky that it’s us and not the government, do you even know what they do to specs like you?” The other boy adds with a wolfish grin.   
Joel’s immediately speeds up his pace, shouting at the pair. “What the fuck are you doing!?”  
The two boys look to Joel's presence, the taller of the two ceasing his beating to speak. “And just who the fuck are you?”  
“None of your goddamn business." Joel spits back, throwing his own backpack onto the floor with a demand."Now let him go.”  
“What are you? His boyfriend?" The second teen let back his head in a laugh, still gripping the boy's arms. "I knew he was a little fag.”  
The next thing Joel sees is red, and before he knows it he has the cocky prick pressed up against the locker, growling dangerously in his ear, voice low and deadly. “Leave. Him. The fuck. Alone.”  
The student freezes up against the locker doors, feet just touching the floor as his suddenly terrified eyes flicker to his accomplice, speaking quickly and nervously. “Fine- Fine, man... J-just chill the hell out.”  
Joel lets out a exhale of calm, dropping the whimpering teen to the floor, watching him crumble to the floor with wide eyes. He watches him rise speedily, muttering something under his breath as he runs off with his friend, leaving Joel and the smaller, bruised boy, his body crumpled on the floor like a piece of paper.  
Joel turns and kneels beside the other, concern in his eyes as he carefully helps him sit up.  
“Are you alright?” Joel asks, holding up the younger boy’s back.  
The kid nods silently, picking up his glasses from the ground and slipping them back on.   
Joel notices blood drying under his nose, tears staining his cheeks.  
“We should get you to the nurse.” Joel decides, rubbing the younger boy’s cheeks a couple of times with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.  
The kid nods again and Joel helps him onto his feet, lets the boy use him for support.   
Joel picks up the boy’s backpack along with his own, slinging them over his free shoulder as they start on their way towards the nurse’s office.  
Joel would explain to Burnie where he’d gone later, as out of character as it seemed he felt like this is one of the times he has to step out of the shadows and help someone.   
Maybe he is doing this out of good will, but Joel's currently racing heart probably has something more to do with it.  
Reaching the nurse’s office, Joel pushes open the door, letting their bags fall to the floor with a relieved grunt.   
The woman behind the desk immediately jumps up, looks appalled at the state of the younger boy.  
“Oh God, what on earth happened?” She asks, pushing back her chair and bustling over to them.  
“Two guys were beating him up. Please make sure he’s okay.”  
“Oh, sweetie...” The woman’s face was a mess of sympathy. “Can you tell me your name?”  
“Ray... Ray Narvaez Jr.” The kid replies quietly, face sullen.  
Ray. Joel makes a mental note of the name.  
“Will you help me get him to a cot so I can go find the nurse?” The woman inquires, looking up at Joel.  
“Yeah, sure.” Joel responds.  
The woman tries her best to get Ray’s other arm around her shoulders but it proves difficult thanks to her short size compared to Joel, who was already keeping Ray up unaided.  
The two manage to get Ray laid down on one of the thin cots, the well-intentioned woman not being much help.  
“I’ll go get Mrs. Wilson.” She smiles, patting down the wrinkles out of her skirt before trotting away.  
Joel grabs the chair from the other side of the room, pulling it over to Ray’s bedside, sitting down.  
“You alright?” Joel asks, trying to make small talk as he drums his fingers against his knee cap.  
“Yeah, I’m used to it.” Ray replies, looking to Joel meekly. ”You didn’t have to bring me here, y’know. You can leave.”  
“Do you want me to go find a friend or something?” Joel asks.  
“My friends are all at another school.” Ray replies.  
There’s a pause, Joel looking down at him curiously before the younger sighed.  
“I ended up here about a month ago. I was trying to get away from everything but seems to have only come back, and ten times harder at that.” Ray explains, eyes averted.  
Joel’s fingers stop instantly before he rests them loosely.  
“I know how you feel.” Joel admits, his turn to look at the ground.  
“What?” Ray questions, his own head shooting up, squinting his eyes at Joel.  
Before Joel could make up an excuse the door reopens, the nurse walking in.   
“Hello there, boys. I’m Ms. Wilson. You must be Mr. Narvaez.” She smiles, her eyes traveling from Ray to Joel, raising an eyebrow. “And who would this gentleman be?”  
Ray eyes flit from Joel, to the nurse, then back to Joel.  
“Um-” Ray begins.  
“I’m Joel.” Joel interrupts.“Joel Heyman. I’m new.”   
“This must be an interesting first day for you then.” Mrs. Wilson remarks, small smile playing on her lips.  
“Yeah.” Joel agrees with his own weary smile.  
The nurse sits Ray up and starts to inspect his injuries, stopping her hands at the rim of the younger’s shirt and looking to Joel. “Before I can continue treating Ray here, I’m going to have to ask you to wait outside the office, Mr. Heyman.”  
“Yeah, sure.” Joel nods, immediately getting up from his chair, glancing at Ray one more time before giving him little a wave. He leaves the room, grabbing his backpack and walking out the office.  
Joel slid down against the wall outside, dropping his knapsack beside him.  
"Hey, Joel." A voice greets from above.  
Joel looks up to discover Burnie staring down at him with a grin.  
"Hey there, Burns." Joel returns, giving him a half-hearted wave.  
"Where we you? I thought we were meeting on the third floor." Burnie crosses his arms.  
"I dropped a little fish here, saw he getting beat up and decided to help him." Joel explains, giving Burnie a little shrug.  
"How bad you hurt the other guy?" Burnie questions with a knowing look, his voice low.  
"What are you talking about?" Joel demands, arching an eyebrow at the other teen.   
"Really, Joel? Remember that guy Kara went out with? For like, what? Four months? How he got a bit too physical with her? How we stole Matt's car, In the dead of night, may I add, and drove all the way out to that asshole’s place to ‘sort things out’? How many stitches did he end up getting again?” Burnie reminds Joel, smirk playing on his face.  
Joel shrugged, feigning confusion when in reality he remembers every detail of the event like it was yesterday rather than just over a year ago.  
-  
Kara had been dating some guy, he had seemed like a keeper, made Kara smile like no one else.   
Simon? Stan? Started with an S that’s for sure, Joel intentionally forgot the name, not wanting anything more with the dickward.   
The guy was a real Prince Charming, brought Kara roses, the two of them spending a lot of time staying over at his place, watching movies and playing video games together.   
They looked like a perfect couple, and acted it too, until one night, Kara came back to the group home sobbing with her makeup running down her face and a quickly bruising mark under her eye.   
After several cuddles and hot chocolate later, Kara broke, spilling that they had been driving to the movies for their weekly date when he had suddenly pulled the car off to the side of the road, wanting to have a quick fuck. Kara, who had spent a long time trying to look nice for their date said no, denying him even when his usual emotional blackmail didn’t worked.   
He grew frustrated and angry, lashing out and smacking Kara across the face. Betrayed and shocked she stormed from the car, been forced to take off her high heels and run barefoot to the nearest bus stop, getting herself home.   
Obviously furious, the boys stole Matt’s car, driving over to her, now ex, boyfriend’s place where they politely showed him what happens when you hurt one of their own.   
Most would’ve called the cops, but by the time they had left, the guy was in no position.  
-  
“You guys were in it too.” Joel argues, looking back down at his lap.  
“You almost killed him, Joel. You’re gonna end up killing yourself if you don’t stop being so damn protective.” Burnie quibs, shaking his head with a teasing smile. “Y’know, I have a feeling that you and this so called ‘little fish’ are gonna be real close if you’re already protecting him from the bullies.”  
“No, we’re not.” Joel defends, making himself believe it more than making convincing Burnie”  
“Maybe I’m just becoming a better person- maybe I did it out of the goodness of my heart.”  
“I’ll take your word.” Burnie chuckles, adding. “By the way here, we don’t call them little fishes, they’re called fresh meat.”  
The bell rings, shrilling through the semi-crowded hallway, signalling the start of next period.   
Students begin to walk hurriedly around him, stepping over Joel’s legs, shooting him small looks as they make their way to their classes.  
Burnie leaves with a nod, but Joel doesn’t move until the door to the office opens again, Mrs. Wilson’s peaking around the corner “Joel?”  
The raven-haired teen instantly perks up and looks up at the nurse. “How’s Ray?”  
“He’s doing alright as he could be. No broken bones but I fear he might have a concussion from beatings to his head. We’re gonna keep him till the end of the day just incase he displays any symptoms. You go on to your class now, I’ll call you down if we need anything.” She replies, smiling.  
Joel nods and gets up from the linoleum floor, grabbing his backpack and leaving to head to his third period class: drama.  
Joel had been put into the grade eleven one because he didn’t have the ‘proper prerequisites’ for his own grade. He enjoys acting, it was Joel’s way of getting everything out in a way that didn’t involve telling everyone his personal problems.   
It was a stress reliever, getting his mind off things, memorizing lines and getting into the character keeping the real Joel from rest of the world. It blocked out the stupid fist fights between Geoff and Burnie, Matt yelling at him for getting in trouble yet again, memories of his parents.  
Stepping into the class, he notices another set of doors that lead into a much darkened room with a carpeted floor, contrasting to the tiled floor of the room that Joel is standing in.   
The lights in the other room are dim, the carpet a mixed gray color. Looking through the meshed window, the teen sees everyone shoeless and sitting on the floor.  
Joel steps into the other room, everyone’s attention suddenly on him. “Um... Hi.”  
An aging blonde woman, turns around with attendance in hand and asks in a tender voice “May I help you?  
“Yeah- I’m new here. Joel Heyman. I think I’m supposed to be here.” Joel feigns confidence with his explanation, his face beginning to feel hot.  
The woman’s face is one of confusion before realisation flickers in her eyes. “Oh yes, Joel!”  
The tall boy gives her a forced smile, his face only getting warmer when he hears the giggle of girls in the room.  
“Take off your shoes and leave your bag with the others so you can come sit down. I’m Miss. Williams. You can join that group over there, the pair by the back of the room.” The woman explains, pointing to the far corner of the classroom where two bored-looking teens sat, paper surrounding them. One boy lay on the floor on his back, the second resting against the wall.  
“Maybe you can help them get their perfomance off the ground.” She gave Joel a wink, smiling.  
Nodding the teen goes back to the brightly lit back room, taking off his sneakers and putting down his bag on the floor. He returns to the main part of the room and trudges over to where his new drama group is.  
“Uh, hey.” Joel’s eyes shift cautiously between the pair, stance defensive.  
The two of them look at him and the ginger haired boy, to Joel’s surprise, gives him a grin. “Hey.”  
“Sit down.” The other says, his hair the color of light sand, blue eyes soft compared to his, almost demanding, statement.  
Joel lets himself down onto the ground, long legs sprawling forward.  
“Well, I’m Jack.” The ginger haired boy speaks again, holding out his hand.  
Jack slumps off the wall slightly, one leg propped up whilst the other is out, a patchy beard starting to form on his face.  
“Joel.” The teen replies, feeling more relaxed as he shakes Jack’s hand. “I like your beard.”  
The teen lying down props up onto his elbows, outstretching his own hand. “Hi Joel. I’m James. But you can call me Ryan.”  
“Nice to meet you. So, er, where are you guys at with your play?” Joel asks, still feeling a bit skittish, however Jack’s smile and Ryan’s confusing enthusiasm at Jack let him use his cow prop made him feel more at ease, better than any of his classes so far anyway.  
Time quickly turns to a blur until the PA speaker suddenly rings through the room. “Can Joel Heyman to come to the Office? Joel Heyman to the Office. Thank-you.”  
All eyes turn to Joel again as he slowly gets up, Jack and Ryan calling their goodbyes. He walks to the back of the room to get his shoes on, Miss. Williams not prying into why, much to Joel’s poorly-hidden relief as he leaves the class.  
The student climbs down several staircases and wanders until he finds the correct path, following arrows and writing on the walls to find the main office.   
He opens a door and a secretary looks up from her computer screen, glasses sat on a button nose. “Ms. Babik is waiting for you in her office.”   
A manicured hand points to another set of doors, eyes returning to her typing.  
Joel lets out a little nervous breath and walks in the pointed direction, going through into another hallway and finding the plaque ‘Ms. Babik. Head Teacher’, stuck to a closed door.   
The worrisome teen composes himself with another shaky breath and knocks on the door. There’s a moments murmuring on the other side of the door, sounds of a chair squeaking back and a pair of heels walking to the door.  
The wooden door opens, revealing a middle aged woman holding it open with tight lines engraved into a tired face. She wears a black pencil skirt that mirrors the colour of her hair, an ash top just lighter than the greying strands of hair around her roots. Her face holds a tight and professional expression, one Joel did not want to mess with.  
“Joel Heyman, I take it?” She asks, her tone laced with irritation.  
“Yeah- I was called to come from class-” Joel replies, swallowing his nerves.  
“Come in.” She moves out of the way, her stoney expression matching her tone.  
Joel enters the office, seeing he was correct in his assumption that this trip is about Ray.  
The walls of the head’s office were painted beige, the floor keeping to the same linoleum design as the hallway.   
There’s a couch pushed against a free wall, looking old and tattered, contrasting to the glossy desk Ms. Babik walked towards, pulling out a dark leather chair.   
Mrs. Wilson smiles up from the couch at Joel, sat besides a nervous-looking Ray, who is holding ice pack to his stomach.   
The older teacher perches herself in her chair before letting out a little cough, sitting up straight and threading her hands together.“Mr. Heyman, I’m sure you understand why you are here today. Mr. Narvaez here tells us that you were defending him? Is this correct?”  
Joel nods silently, deciding it was best not to risk interrupting the woman.   
“Whilst our security cameras in the West Hall do prove Mr. Narvaez’s explanation, they also show that you displayed quite a deal of aggression towards one of the boys involved in the incident.”  
The standing teen waits a few moments to make sure Ms. Babik had finished before defending himself. “I had to, ma’am, they were hitting him.”  
“I see. However, you do seem to have a quite a record of assaults with other students.” The woman straightens out some papers in a file with Joel’s name on it, looking back up at older student. “Did these boys provoke you in any other way, Mr. Heyman? Insulting your family perhaps?”  
“They only thing they did was attack Ray.” Joel responds, subconsciously playing with his hands.  
“Are you sure?” She questions, flipping shut the brown folder on her desk.  
Fear begins to bubble up in Joel’s throat, his chest tightening. It’s only his first day and there’s already a chance he’s being thrown out of school. A month is his shortest record and he really doesn’t want to beat it.   
Joel knows for sure that Matt will be disappointed in him, even if Ms. Babik just phones up with a warning. He’ll go off on one of his lengthy tangents, that the group jokingly title as ‘fatherly rants’. He knows he should just brush it off like the rest of them, but Joel wants to make not only Matt proud, but Kathleen as well, they were second parents to him and he didn’t want to let them down.  
As worry and fear overcome Joel’s system, the only visible sign of his internal struggle being the bottom lip between his teeth, Ray sees Joel’s silence and looks to Ms. Bablik, deciding this situation he was not going to stay quiet in. “He’s telling the truth, Miss. He really did try shouting at them, but it didn’t work and I doubt anything would have. They just kept hitting me. He did the right thing, I promise.”   
Joel looks up in surprise at Ray’s wavering voice, the teen’s cheeks stained red.  
“Are you certain, Mr. Narvaez?” Ms. Bablik asks in confirmation, lifting up a pen to scribble down notes for a report.  
“Absolutely. If Joel hadn't of shown up when he did, I would be in a worse state than this.” Ray replies, forcing himself to look directly at the woman.  
The teacher goes icly silent for a moment, eyes looking to Ray and Joel as she made up her decision, letting out a little sigh. “Alright. I’ll let this slide, Mr Heyman, but you must realise that violence is never acceptable in my halls, and should be, a very last resort.”  
Joel immediately nods, relief washing through him.  
“...And, Mr. Narvaez, please do get better soon. Your art skills are needed in a few months for the Art Festival.” Ms. Babik keeps her stoney expression but her eyes soften, looking back to Ray  
“Of course, Miss. I’m already working on a couple of pieces.” Ray smiles sheepishly with a nod..  
“Just make sure you don’t push yourself too much, take a few days to off from working to heal, won’t you?” The beginning of a smile tugs at the corners of the woman’s thin lips, bringing her hands back together.  
“I will, Miss.” Ray responds, Mrs. Wilson helping him stand.  
She dismisses the two boys outside alone for a moment, asking to speak Mrs. Wilson breifly about Ray’s injuries.  
The pair stand out in the hallway, awkward silence filling the air.  
“What time is it?” Joel asks, trying to break the ice.  
“There’s ten minutes till the end of third period. I’m probably gonna have to go back to the Nurse’s Office.” Ray replies, looking from his watch to down the hall.  
Joel nods, slipping his hands in his pockets, trying to think of a response.  
“Y’know, It’s- It’s, er, my first year at my second school already and I was starting to think I’d have to move again…” Ray lets out a little uncertain laugh, looking at the floor as he holds his icepack. “My grandma tried really hard to get me into this school- I just wanna to do something to make her proud, something to say thanks for everything and- well, I guess what I’m trying to say is… Thank-you, Joel, you really saved my ass earlier and I- I guess.”  
“Wanna meet up before school? Like- I, er…Just so I can see if you’re doing any better and stuff. You’re just a little fish and I have to make sure that you’re alright.” Joel blurts, feeling embarrassed as soon as the words leave his mouth.  
“That’s sounds good, where d’you wanna to meet?” Ray stifles a giggle, smiling at Joel and wondering what the hell a ‘little fish’ was.   
“My locker- it’s by the art room and near the side doors of the school, the doors are on the right side of the blue door.” Joel explains, cringing internally at how bad he was at giving directions.  
“I know where that is.” Ray half-lies, deciding to just wait outside the art room, cheeks slowly turning redder than they already were.  
“Good, I guess I’ll see you then?” Joel replies, his own face beginning to blush at his own awkwardness.  
Mrs. Wilson exits the office and smiling at the pair, saying hello to Joel and starting to walk back to the Nurse’s Office with Ray, the small teen glancing back and leaving the older with a small smile.  
Joel cursed himself, the desperate question of ‘Want to grab a burger later?’ still on the tip of his tongue, the raven-haired student fearing of sounding either too forward or too casual.   
He simply smiles lopsidedly back, keeping his mouth shut and shamefully watching the younger boy’s behind as he walks away.  
Questions flutter through Joel’s mind, the red of Ray’s cheeks and the final sliver of a smile playing on repeat.  
-  
The day ends after Joel’s English class, the teen walking both ways outside the Nurse’s Office several times before swallowing nerves and pride, opening the door.   
The woman behind the desk looks up in surprise, giving Joel a smile. “Oh, it’s you. Hello, there.”  
“Hey. Is Ray here?” Joel asks, faking an air of confidence.  
“Yes, he is, but they are talking to Mrs. Wilson currently. They’ll be out shortly.” She replies.  
“Could I wait?” Joel requests, Kathleen’s scolding voice of ‘manners’ suddenly running through his head. “Please.”  
“You may, but please be quiet.” She nods towards the plastic chairs, returning to her computer screen.  
Joel murmurs a ‘thank-you’ and closes the door behind him softly, deciding to rest against it instead of taking a seat, the only sounds of that of a clicking mouse and a guttural heater.  
The second door finally opens, Mrs. Wilson coming out with Ray, and to Joel’s surprise, a third person.  
She was an older woman, grey hair tied back in a low, messy bun. Height wise, she’s the smallest in the room, rounded glasses perching on the edge of her nose. She clutches to a walking stick, stance a little wobbly. Joel notices she had a striking resemblance to Ray.   
The teen’s arm is tucked under the lady’s arm, adding to Joel’s theory of her being Ray’s grandmother.  
“Ray, tell your grandmother I say thank you for me, please”  
Ray looks down at the elderly woman and speaks confidently. “La señora Wilson dice gracias”  
Joel eyes widen, surprised by how fluent Ray was, vaguely recognizing the words as Spanish.  
Ray’s grandma gives Mrs. Wilson a smile and a nod before Ray begins to help her to the exit, trying not to wince at the pain when he notices Joel standing there.  
Ray smiles, blush already beginning to creep back “Hey, Joel. I thought you would be home by now.”  
“Just making sure you’re alright.” Joel responds, mentally hitting himself for not coming up for better excuses, this one was definitely getting old, fast.  
“You really care about those you save, Joel. Not even Superman would do that.” Ray jokes lamely, letting out a small huff of a laugh.  
Joel nervously chuckles along with the other, growing worried as thoughts of Ray starting to think he was creepy plaguing his mind.  
Before Joel could leave and wallow in a pit of sorrow and embarrassment, Ray’s grandmother suddenly speaks up. “Ray, ¿quién es este joven?”  
“Se trata de Joel, Él fue quien me salvó..” Ray explains quickly, smiling at Joel’s clueless face  
The older woman’s brown eyes light up, letting go of her grandson’s arm and letting the hook of her walking stick slide down her rising arms as she pulls Joel into a hug, her arms holding him as tightly as her aging bones would let her. Panic, followed by confusion and red cheeks explode over Joel’s face as he pats awkwardly at the woman’s back, looking to Ray.  
Ray lets out a little giggle, about to help Joel out before his grandmother begins talking again.  
“¡Gracias por salvar a mi nieto usted! Él es mi bebé y yo sería muy, muy molesto si yo fuera a perderlo. Él es el único que me queda de mi hija. ¡Muchas gracias!”  
She lets go of her hold the confused teen, cupping Joel’s face and kissing his cheeks, nodding happily and hobbling back to her grandson.  
She hooks her arm around his, signalling that she’s ready to leave.  
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Joel.” Ray smiles, laughing one last time before giving him a wave, saying a final goodbye to Mrs.Wilson, who too was grinning in amusement alongside the office worker.  
As the pair walk out of the office, heading towards the front doors of the school, Joel can already hear them talking away, the Spanish words lost on his ears.  
Mrs. Wilson goes back into the other room, Joel waving an awkward goodbye to the woman behind the desk before he exits the office himself, letting out a long huff of air.   
Outside, resting against the wall by the entrance, is Burnie, shit-eating grin spreading over his face upon seeing Joel.  
Joel saunters up to the other, pulling his bag up further up his shoulder. “What are you doing here?”  
“Looking for you.” Burnie answers honestly, knowing eyes looking the dark-haired teen up and down.  
“How did you know where I was?” Joel questions, raising an eyebrow.  
Burnie shrugs. “Shot in the dark.”  
“Bullshit, why do you need me? The real reason?” Joel’s tone borderlines on irritation, pushing hands into his pockets.  
Burnie pushes off the wall. “To get your ass, Geoff is picking us up.”  
Joel lets out a groan. “Did he steal the car, again?”  
Burnie lets out a sigh. “No, at least not this time. He actually has the minivan. Now let’s get going before Geoff leaves our butts here.”  
“I fucking hate that minivan.” Joel continues to groan, starting to the follow Burnie.  
“Suck it up, Joel. Everyone does. Even people who don’t live in the house hate the minivan.” Burnie responds, pushing through the first set of the door that lead outside.  
Joel nods in agreement, the two teens leaving the building.   
Joel immediately spots Matt’s silver minivan by the doors, the thing almost parked on the sidewalk. Geoff waves from the driver’s seat, Gus in the back.  
The minivan itself was not only falling apart but, as Geoff blatantly put it, ‘you can’t pick up ladies in this piece of crap. Possibly small children- but not ladies.’   
Rust was spread under the doors and they had re-painted it silver a total of five times, mostly because of accidents and one run in with a couple of drug dealers in the middle of exchanging goods which ended up the van having one of the tires popped and, of course, the paint being redone.   
The windows in the far back were only capable of being opened a tiny bit, the middle windows covered in duct tape whilst the only windows not fucked-up beyond repair were up in the front, the air conditioning busted up far beyond repair.  
Gus notices the two other boys approaching and yells through the slightly open window “Hey, guys!”  
“Why are you in the back? Like the far, far back? Isn’t it permanently reserved for this idiot?” Burnie asks, jerking his thumb in the general direction of Joel.  
Before Joel could protest Gus explains “Geoff thought it was funny if I did along with you guys, he keeps saying how he’s the only ‘parent’ in this fucked up family, so we all have to sit in the back.”  
Burnie rolls his eyes and goes to the passenger seat, hand opening the door.“Whatever.”  
Before he could open the door Geoff, slams it back shut jokingly. “Get in the back, Burns.”  
“Geoff, I know it’s a joke, but I’m tired and we’re not five years old. C’mon let me sit in the front.” Burnie complains, the sun starting to beat down on his back.  
“I’ll put the dress on again.” Geoff warns, eyes serious as he grins.  
Joel stops opening the door to the back seat briefly, rolling his eyes. “Oh fuck... Not the dress.”  
-  
Last time Geoff picked Burnie up, he had stopped halfway, burst into a burger joint, the tie of his uniform already pulled off as he strode into their washroom, surprising everyone by exiting soon after in a pink floral dress.   
The wind picked up as he was walking back to the van, the entire restaurant seeing Geoff’s boxers as the wind lifted the dress upwards, much to Joel and Gus’s amusement.   
He immediately drove the guys up to Burnie’s school, getting out of the car and waiting for the teen to arrive, occasionally the dress fluttering up in the continuing wind, Geoff leaning suggestively against the car, Joel and Gus close to wetting themselves in the back.  
-  
“I don’t care. Can’t I just sit in the damn front? It’s a billion degrees out here and I had fucking gym last period.” Burnie argues.  
“Just sit in the back, it’s only ten minutes away, dude. It’ll be funny as dicks.” Geoff says, trying to convince the other with a grin still wide on his face.  
“Fuck, Geoff- you’re just like a mom.” Burnie growls.  
As soon as the words escape Burnie’s mouth the air feels tense as it does hot.  
Burnie’s eyes go wide and he quickly apologizes “Oh shit... Fuck, Geoff, I’m so sorry, man. I didn’t-”   
Geoff cuts him off, his tone awfully calm. “It’s alright, Burnie. Just get in the car.”  
-  
Way before living in the his current care home, Geoff had lived with various foster careers, not staying in one for place for more than a few months at most.   
He had been in the system since he was three, fuzzily remembering his birth mother, the vague image getting overlapped and overlapped by the different foster mothers until he got to the point where he couldn’t even tell the difference anymore.   
By the time he was living with Matt and Kathleen he was smoking pot and popping ecstasy, spending more time on the streets with ‘friends’ than in school, only occasionally turning up to classes so he could stir up trouble, just wanting some attention and overall just silently feeling abandoned by everyone.   
The pair gave Geoff a heavy ultimatum: if he cleared up his grades, got his act together and tried to find better people to hang around with, they would track down his birth mother so Geoff could has some proper closure.   
The teen immediately complied, and at a quick pace, desperate to meet the only family he felt connected to at the time.   
Geoff went from Fs to As and Bs, never touching a joint or pill again, becoming closer to the others in the house, ditching his old friends altogether.   
The day came for Geoff to meet his mother, Kathleen helping him get ready.  
They had organised to meet at the local diner, Geoff literally bouncing in his seat the whole drive there, clutching excitedly to the steering wheel all the way.   
When he arrived, he got a table by the window so he could watch her arrive and begun his wait.  
He waited, and waited, and waited, eventually the diner closing up for the day, his mother still a no-show.  
She didn’t even call.  
She just left Geoff waiting.   
The devastated boy was forced to leave, getting back into the van and letting out a sniffle, soon followed by an explosion of tears.  
One call later and Matt walked the thirty minutes by foot, driving Geoff home, the boy laying down on the back seats, crying.   
A week later, when Geoff’s pain was finally beginning to numb, a letter was sent to him which only ripped the wound back open, knife turning not only from her standing him up, but also the pain from his childhood.   
The contents of the paper are still a mystery to everyone in the house, Geoff refusing to let anyone to see it but him, but from the mumbling in his sleep and dropping comments on how he was a mistake and how his mother never wants to see him again, they could guess on the contents.  
Recently, Geoff had picked up drinking, his intake slowly becoming a habit.  
-  
Burnie gets in the front seat and Geoff drives off, the tense air from outside coming inside the van.   
Geoff begins the drive to Kara’s school, Burnie muttering. “You know you never needed her, right?”  
Geoff jerks quickly, pulling over to the side of the road, taking the keys out of the ignition, fury pouring from his mouth. “Fuck you.”   
He throws throws the keys at Burnie’s head, not caring where they hit the other boy.  
“What are you doing?” Burnie asks bewildered as the two in the back, looking from the keys that are resting against his thigh to Geoff who is about to open the car door.  
“I’m fucking walking.” Geoff growls, getting out and slamming the door behind him in pent-up rage.  
Joel undid his seatbelt and slides open the van door, following Geoff speedily as Gus and Burnie stare from the van.  
Getting close enough, he grabs Geoff’s coloured arm hastily. “Geoff, please. Just chill out.”  
Geoff pulls his arm from Joel’s hand, getting in the taller teen’s face. “Why should I?”  
“Because I know Burnie fucked shit up and you know he’s a fucking idiot who can’t keep his damn mouth shut! I know you’re mad at your mom. Hell, I would be too- but like Burnie said, you’re part of this family, the same as me, the same as anyone. You’re the one who brought this family together, you almost took glue and stuck us to one another. For God’s sake, you put Burnie and Kara in that damn friendship sweater, you even put me in there! What I’m trying to get at is, I know you’re having a hard time getting over your mom, but you’re gonna have too. You’re not alone anymore, so stop fucking acting like it. We all have our baggage and we’re all trying to make it work.” Joel rants, grabbing holding the other teen’s arm firmly again.  
Geoff looks at Joel before pulling him into a hug. “He’s a fucking, fuck, fuck.”   
Geoff lets out a quiet sob, Joel feeling the vibrations coming from Geoff’s chest.  
“A-are you alright?” Joel asks pathetically, his chest beginning to tighten.  
Joel was the worse person in the world when it came to crying, especially when there wasn’t someone Joel could specifically blame for it.   
Their tears made Joel get this feeling in his chest, as if someone were twisting and putting knots in his ribcage, making it hard for him to breath, screwing with his, already poor and lacking, decision making, hence why sometimes he gets into fights when he sees someone cry.  
Geoff lets go of Joel, releasing a final sniffle and wiping the tears from his eyes and face with the back of his hand before setting back into his usual calm demeanor. “Yeah. I’m fine.”   
Joel knows better, but stays silent, knowing Geoff is just sticking his feelings back into the hole where he usually kept them.   
“Wanna go join the idiots back in the van?” Joel asks, jerking a thumb backwards.  
“Yeah, I guess...” Geoff responds, being to trudge back.  
The two teens reach the van and sit back in their respective seats.  
Geoff meets Burnie’s gaze momentarily before swiping the keys from his grasp, igniting the car back to life.  
Joel closes the door behind him and they drive off.  
By the time they reach home, Geoff goes straight to their bedroom, closing the door without saying another word.  
Joel knows what’s wrong, he knows what Geoff is doing. He throws his black and white knapsack on the couch and walks to the guys bedroom.  
Kara looks over to Burnie and asks “What’s wrong?”  
“It’s not a big deal. Joel will call us if he needs anything.” Burnie replies, not telling Kara the truth.  
It’s sadly common for them to lie to Kara, it wasn’t because she’s a girl although, more that she’s their little sister and they want to protect her at all costs, even if that means telling a white lie once in a while.  
Joel opens the door to find Geoff curled up into a ball on his bed by the window with that damned letter in his grasp, holding it close to him the way a child would hold a stuffed toy.  
“Geoff.” Joel says, stepping into the room.  
The room is large, with beds for Burnie, Gus, Geoff and, Joel.   
Burnie and Gus shared a bunk bed whilst the other’s hand singular, the walls painted four different colours, for each boy in the room, after weeks of bickering over which colour they wanted the walls to be.   
There was orange for Geoff, red for Gus, light blue for Burnie, and a darker blue for Joel. It’s supposed to be an indicator for which corner of the room is there’s. Half of the room where the door is, is split into separate parts vertically for which bunk is theirs. The light blue on top and the red on the bottom of the wall, showing that Burnie has the top bunk and Gus has the bottom.  
Geoff’s part of the room was by the window, his portion on the right hand side whilst Joel had the left.  
Joel grabs drags a chair to the end of of the other’s bed and sits in front of Geoff, looking direct.  
“Geoff, please.” Joel begins in a whisper.  
“Please what, Joel? I’ve been trying to keep the last fucking seventeen years of my life in a box with the lid tightly sealed and all you fucking people keep on doing is opening it up and acting surprised when I fucking snap.” The teen growls, laying on his side and facing away from the taller.  
“You don’t need to seal it up! We’re a family, Geoff! How many times have I woken up in the middle of the night screaming, huh? It’s not like we’re gonna abandon you! You bottle it all up and pretend to be strong, but you know as well as me, you’re not. Please, Geoff. Matt even said that you can see go seem some councilor or a therapist or some shit. It won’t cost the home a cent, and dude, c’mon, they even have free snacks. If you don’t want Matt or Kathleen, you know I’d go for them- I’d go and wait in the that damn waiting room and eat those fucking free snacks and steal all the pamphlets and hand-out condoms they own so we can have a laugh on the way home and put them under Gus’ mattress- just like you did with me. You took care of me in my darkest hour, man, you made me stop cutting.” He pauses, rolling up his grey-coloured uniform slacks to reveal lumpy scars on his knees, left behind by sharp scissors that once cut his skin.  
Geoff actually sits up, lost for words as Joel continues. “Just give the word and I’ll go with you, you know I will.”  
Geoff nods, not speaking in fear of tears. He let go of the paper, shuffling forward to wrap an arm around Joel’s shoulders pulling him into a bear hug.  
“Thanks, Joel.” Geoff finally says, voice muffled by Joel’s shirt covered shoulder.  
“No problem.” Joel replies, hugging the other teen tightly.  
Geoff releases Joel and stuffs his letter into the top drawer of his messy nightstand before laying back down on his back, staring at the ceiling.  
“What will it be?” Joel asks, the laying student’s eyes sliding back to him.  
Geoff sighs before responding. “If you come with me, I’ll go. We can go Friday. I have work all this week.”  
“Friday sounds good.” Joel smirks, getting up to give Geoff a hi-five.  
“Thanks again, man.” Geoff smiles, putting both arms behind his head, settling down into a more relaxed rest.  
Joel nods and drags the chair back to the foot of his bed, accidentally speaking aloud. “Lots of people have been saying that today.”  
“Wait, what?” Geoff asks, raising an eyebrow and looking back up at Joel.  
The taller teen looks over to Geoff, opening his mouth and closing it again before shaking his head. “Nevermind.”  
Geoff moves his arms away from behind his head and props up on his elbows and asks “Did you fight someone?”  
Joel turns back around. “No... well, yes... maybe? Kinda?”  
“Give me the straight answer.”  
“I just stopped a couple of guys from beating on this other guy: Ray.”  
Geoff’s attention perks, sitting up against the backboard of the beard as a shit-eating grin flies across his face. “So, this guy you defended has a name? I thought when you help people they remain nameless?”  
“Fuck off.” Joel replied, letting out a groan.  
“Is he cute?” Geoff asks, eyes flashing knowingly.  
Joel narrows his eyes as Geoff continues.   
“Aww, c’mon, this how I make myself feel better. Give me some details.”  
“He’s alright, I guess. It’s not like you’ll be attracted to him.” Joel argues, crossing his arms. “Besides, you have that thing for that girl next door.”  
“Don’t talk shit about Griffon.” Geoff defends, looking subconsciously out the window to the house next to them.  
“So, this girl you stalk has a name? I thought when you stalk people they remain nameless?” Joel mimics, mocking Geoff’s earlier statement.  
Geoff flips him off, tone still teasing.“Shut it. So are you asking this guy out or are you gonna chicken out like normal?”  
“Why do you even think I'm even interested in him?” Joel asks.  
“Because you never ask for names. You fight and move on, so I’m assuming he has to be pretty cute.” Geoff responds  
“Don’t make fun of me.” Joel growls, his expression turning mad, knowing deep down that Geoff is right.  
“I’m not making fun of you, I know what love feels like” Geoff defends.  
Joel lies down on his own bed, the springs squeaking under his weight as he flops backs.   
He intertwines his fingers behind his head, giving in. “Fine then, Mr. Romantic, how should I get Ray to go out with me?”  
“Ask for his number tomorrow.” Geoff simply replies.  
“What if he doesn’t have a phone?” Joel begins to make up excuses out of worry, turning his head.  
“Why wouldn’t he?” Geoff questions, raising his hands incredulously.  
“Neither Gus or Kara have one, the chances are likely.” Joel continues, rubbing his thumbs together behind his head.  
Geoff lets out a sigh. "Stop being a pussy and ask the kid out”  
“I could say the same about you and Griffon.” Joel mutters to himself.  
-  
Griffon, the septum-pierced chick that lives next door, was often the subject of Geoff's daydreaming fantasies.  
Her bedroom window lines up almost perfectly with the window in the boy’s room. Geoff even trading sides with Burnie and Gus so he could get a better look at her through the windowpane.  
Most days after school, when Geoff isn’t working, he sits there and waits for her to get home, watching her silhouette change through closer curtains, hiding himself as she reopens them, both wanting to remain invisible from her forever and catch her eye.  
All he knows is a name, the non-uniform school she goes to just outside the area and her hobby, which includes her being outside with a chainsaw, cutting wood into fantastical sculptures, which, incidentally, Geoff finds super cool- and hot as dicks.  
-  
“What? Knock on her door to be met with a girl way out of my league and her uptight parents? What the fuck would I say? 'Hi, I stare at you through your window a lot. Will you go out with me?" You have it a lot easier, dude.” Geoff rolls his eyes, sarcasm venomous in his voice.  
“No I don’t, he's probably straight considering my luck. I'd have more luck with his grandmother, she seemed to like me more than he did..."." Joel mused, moving his hands to his stomach.  
“You met his grandmother? Damn, stop moping, you’re already halfway there.” Geoff points out, jerking a finger in Joel's direction.  
“She was just grateful for me saving her grandson is all, but seriously though, he's straight."  
Geoff looks back up at the white plaster of the ceiling, before back to Joel. "Let’s just settle it like this; we’re both after someone that we think we can't get, whether it’s through being being a bit of a creep or sexual orientation. So we might as well say 'fuck it' and give it a shot, right? What's the worse that could happen?"  
“You just admitted to being a stalker.”  
“Shut up, Heyman. It’s not that bad- If you keep making fun of me, I’m gonna have to stop giving you dating advice.” Geoff tries to sound upset, letting out a chuckle.  
“Oh, I'll be missing out on so much." Sarcasm drips from Joel's tone, the taller throwing a pillow at Geoff’s head.  
Geoff curses and throws the pillow back, Joel laughing and looking away from his friend to the ceiling, actually considering Geoff’s advice. Joel hopes feebly that the worse case scenario stays tucked in his head and doesn't turn into a gut churning reality.   
Feeling slightly more equipped for the next morning, Joel smiles to himself, looking forward to seeing his little fish again.


	2. That Damn Pie

Ray finds himself at school earlier than he was supposed to.  
He didn’t manage to sleep a single wink all night, it wasn’t because he stayed up late studying or from the throbbing pain from his injuries: he just couldn’t stop thinking about Joel.  
His mind was on the morning where he’d see him again, this morning, so he can give him the present his grandmother had fondly made for the older teen.  
The scrawny teen knows he’s falling head over heels for the other, part of his mind nagging away that it’s simply an unrequited-puppy love and nothing will ever come out of it, and if it does, it’ll only heartbreak.  
Joel is obviously a lot older and probably hasn’t even thought at all about the younger since he left yesterday.  
Still, Ray decides he is going to try anyway, although if Joel ends up rejecting Ray, the Puerto Rican knows he would never be able to face the older teen again, ending up avoid him at all costs.  
When Ray arrived home the night, he found his two best friends, Gavin and Michael, waiting out on the front step for Ray.  
Apparently when Mrs. Wilson called his grandma, Gavin and Michael were already at Ray’s house for lunch, which they usually do because Ray’s house is so close to their school that they can make it there and back in school before lessons start again.  
Ray’s grandmother is more than happy to do this, usually makes the pair a grilled cheese sandwich or hot dogs and beans.  
Michael and Ray have been friends since they were four years old, from the first day of school, they were always together and jokingly called themselves the ‘Unstoppable Duo’.  
Where one went, the other followed- even when Ray’s mom left with a strange man to never return again, leaving the boy in the care of his Spanish-speaking grandma, Ray and Michael never strayed away from one another.  
The turn of events instead brought them closer.  
Ray remembers once waking up in the middle of the night, sobbing over Mom abandoning him. He immediately called Michael, even though it was the dead of night, Ray not wanting to wake up his grandma.  
Michael stayed up with his friend until he fell back asleep, Ray’s words slowing down until they were nothing but soft breathing.  
Michael was the only person, other than Ray’s grandma, who knew how to deal with Ray when he got himself wrapped up in an anxiety attack, leaving his class, (with the excuse of needing to use the washroom), to find his glasses-wearing friend.  
Seven years later, Gavin moved from England, and the unstoppable duo became a trio, the two boys letting Gavin into their tight circle.  
Michael had felt sorry for the boy because of his over sized nose and just as big attitude, which often came off to people as annoying. Ray on the other hand, saw what Michael didn’t see, making him want to be Gavin’s friend.  
-  
It was Halloween and Michael was off sick with the flu. Ray was dressed up like Mario, all-out with the fake mustache and everything.  
Him and Michael would often see Gavin playing alone most of the time, Michael just brushing it off, however that day, Ray knew something was off. Gavin most of the time looked content with being alone in the playground, playing with action figures on the grass or pavement, keeping himself to himself.  
He had chosen to dress up as Master Chief, the mask, lifted past his mouth because of his over-sized nose. During recess his mask was lifted, revealing a terrified look on his face.  
Ray didn’t understand why he had it on that day, when on others he is happy as can be.  
Then Ray saw it, he saw four grade eights go up to him and proceed to beat him up. Ray stood there for a few moments before running over, yelling at the top of his lungs, tears streaking his face due to fear and the fact that his screams were the most he said to anyone in the school the whole time he had been there.  
Ray managed to get the bullies away from Gavin and helped him up from the pavement to the nurse’s office, both boys crying the whole way inside, Ray supporting Gavin inside.  
It turned out that Gavin had owed the bullies lunch money because his busy parents kept forgetting to give it to the boy for his lunch.  
When the day ended, Ray brought Gavin back to his house, talking the whole way home about how great his grandma’s cooking was. Meeting the kind-hearted woman, she fell in love with Gavin immediately as if he were just another grandson, mostly because of his accent and his ability to eat as much cooking as she’d give him, not that she’d admit this.  
Ever since then the three of them have been best friends, and even with Ray at another school, they still remained close.  
-  
Ray sighed, recalling how when he arrived home yesterday, Gav and Michael had bombarded him with questions about the guys who had beaten him up, Michael loudly threatening to beat the shit out of anyone who took part in it. His grandma soon calmed the two other boys down with gentle pats, bringing everyone inside to start cooking.  
Ray swore he had never seen someone eat a hamburger as angrily as Michael had when dinner was served, the teen continuing to yell, pieces of meat flying out of his mouth in the process.  
The thought makes Ray chuckle aloud as he stands alone in the empty hallway, apple pie still in his hands, waiting to be gifted to Joell.  
Students start to enter the school, the doors opening and closing.  
Ray’s hopes skyrocket again as he thinks about seeing Joel, an embarrassingly bright grin on his face. People oddly begin to look at Ray and his homemade pie, but he doesn’t mind, even if his crush crashes and burns, right now the anxiety of it isn’t there, and Ray is going to enjoy every last second of it.  
Joel, however, had a very different morning.  
He wasn't able to sleep and had an extremely difficult time getting up in that morning. Geoff was in the shower longer than usual so Joel wasn’t able to, Gus ate the last bit of his cereal and blamed Joel for not telling Kathleen or Matt when they go to pick up groceries even though it’s Gus’ job to keep track of food amounts. While he was getting ready the others left without, and now he finds himself running down the street after the minivan full of his shitty family, which to Joel’s surprise, drives extremely fast for it’s poor external state.  
Joel thanked God that the third place he achieved in the his elementary school’s track meet for four years in a row was able to allow him to keep up with the car, yelling at Geoff to stop.  
The van eventually pulls up to a red light, halfway to Joel’s school and he weaves in between other stopped cars and pulls the van door open and gets in before shutting it behind him with a great amount of force, leaving some of the others in fear of the door breaking.  
He crawls in the back beside Gus, looks at him with eyes narrowed to the point where they are slits before looking out the window.  
“Uh... Hey, Joel.” Geoff says, nervously from the front seat.  
Joel’s eyes flicker to Geoff, his tone grave, “Suck my dick, Ramsey.”  
Geoff continues to drive when the light turns green, by the time Geoff pulls into the school parking lot, the second bell has rung and students are rushing to their classes, Geoff almost running over a small Asian girl.  
Joel climbs over Kara and quickly gets out of the van, dashing inside the building, leaving Burnie behind as he takes his time getting out of the van.  
Joel looks around before dashing down the halls, down two flights of stairs and down another empty hall till he gets close to his locker.  
Ray is nowhere in sight and a note is sticking out the top of his locker. Joel rushes over and takes the note out, unfolding the paper quickly.  
In Ray’s messy writing it reads:

Joel,  
I’m pretty sure this is your locker. If it is all I have to say is that you said before school I should wait here and I waited. With a fucking pie and everything. If you didn’t want to show up, you should've just told me. Being left to hang really hurts and I was actually wanted to see you. Don’t give me hope if there isn’t any.  
-Ray.

Joel groans loudly a ‘fuck!’ before stuffing the note in his bag and walking to his class, his head hanging low as guilt grips his heart. His mind swirls, imagining Ray stood there alone, being left out to dry. It was mainly sadness because he feels like he broke Ray’s heart, but also anger towards his family for being such assholes.  
The day drags along, minutes feeling like hours and hours feeling like they would never end, each class feeling like it’s playing in slow motion.  
Joel feeling worse and worse as each hour drags on, each period starting and ending, his pace slow and his mind in a whirlwind, distracted from what he should be learning. Anytime he got called out his face flushed red and embarrassment mixed with the guilt of leaving Ray to hang and dry, left tears corning at his eyes. Third period, Ryan and Jack covered for Joel’s ghost like attitude so the teacher didn’t get mad at Joel for not working, Joel said he’d return the favour but Jack and Ryan shrugged it off and Ryan said that, “It’s no big deal, a lot of things must be on your mind today.”  
By fourth period Joel was thinking of every possible way to find Ray, first was acting like he was part of yearbook till he finds Ray, second way was to go to each class and act like a teacher was looking for Ray, he finally came to a conclusion to ask the woman in the nurse’s office for Ray’s address and hope she doesn’t call the cops.  
The bell finally rings, releasing Joel from the confines of English class and his plan springs into action. He makes his way to the nurse’s office, a wave of anxiety crashing over him like a strong wave. He slips inside the office, carefully closing the door behind him.  
The woman behind the desk looks at him, looking away from her brightly colored nails.  
“Hello, Mr. Narvaez isn’t here.” She greets.  
“I know.” He pauses, taking a deep breath before continuing “I need his address- I know it’s probably illegal, but he’s mad at me, and I need to pull something the equivalent to one of a movie in order to make it up to him.”  
“You are correct to Mr. Heyman, it is indeed illegal. Do you not know Mr. Narvaez’s address?” She questions.  
“I don’t.” Joel replies, starting to bite the inside of his cheek.  
She looks to her computer, then to Joel and lets out a sigh before saying “I can do it, but if you get arrested, do not dare bring up my name.”  
“I promise, ma’am.” Joel nods.  
She gestures for him to come closer to her desk with one of his brightly painted fingernails. Joel crosses over from the doors to the fake wooden desk and she starts to type away at her computer. With a couple clicks of her mouse, the printer starts up.  
Joel looks at her with a look of confusion, masking his face. She quickly snatshes the paper when it finishes being printed one and folds the piece of paper neatly and quickly in half before handing it to Joel.  
Joel looks at the paper and up to her.  
To cure his curiosity, she says, “It’s the address.”  
“Oh, thank you.” Joel expresses, a smile on his face. A full toothy grin pinning at his lips.  
She asks him to leave the office and he quickly obliges and leaves the office, the smile still on his lips. He quickly leaves the school and walks to the closest convenience store.  
Inside the store, he pulls out four dollars, which was originally supposed to be for lunch and buys as many roses as he can before starting his journey. As he gets farther and farther away from the convenience store, he misses it’s air conditioning more and more but he carried on to Ray’s house.  
Once he reaches Ray’s street, he’s surprised by how close Ray lives not only to the school but, also where he lives as well. He starts to walk down the street, the Texas sun beating down on him to the point where he has tos top for a moment to take his obvious non-uniform sweatshirt off, now noticing wet sweat stains under his arms that make his inwardly curse at himself, there was no turning back now so Joel turns on Ray’s street and starts to look for his home.  
When he reaches number thirty-three, he notices that it’s the only house he’s seen so far on the street that has a lush green front yard, the other front lawns are withered and brown. There’s even a little flower bed near the brick front of the house.  
Joel’s front yard looks similar, one of the chores is to water the lawn which Geoff took care of most of the time. He wouldn’t admit it but the only reason why he does it is because Griffon most of the time will be outside, sawing away at thick chunks of wood, making art out of it. Geoff goes outside shirtless when he mows the lawn and waters it. He says that she notices him but Joel knows he’s lying.  
Joel looks down at the roses in his hand, almost certain that the sweat from his palms is keeping the roses alive under the hot Texas sun. He looks back to the front door and quickly climbs the four cement steps, enters the first glass door and, knock on the white painted with glass in the middle. He takes a deep breath before knocking on the door.  
He looks at the roses once more, not noticing the door opening. He comes back to reality when the smell of cooking food, which makes Joel stomach growl in realization that he hasn’t eaten all day, and the sounds of video game gun shots invades his senses.  
“¿Hola?” Joel hears someone ask.  
He looks to the door and sees Ray’s grandma, her arms folded and her expression displeased.  
“Um.. Hi. Is Ray home?” Joel asks, looking down at her/  
“Sí.” She simply replies.  
“I know that means yes.” He says to himself before asking her “May I see him?”  
“No, usted decide salvarlo un día y romper el corazón de mi nieto al siguiente. No voy a dejar que lo ves, yo no permito que hagas eso de nuevo.” She rants, leaving the teen confused and not able to translate what she just said.  
It becomes clear to Joel when she starts to close the door in the teen’s face but, before she fully closes it Ray pipes up and says “Abuela, que está en la puerta?”  
“Ese chico de ayer, el que le ahorra.” His grandmother responds.  
The sound of the game stops and the sound of a chair moving back followed by footsteps until Joel sees Ray, now holding the side of the wall that partially divides the living room and dining room.  
“Hi.” Joel says, his voice low yet soft.  
“Hey.” Ray steps and switches to Spanish to say to his grandmother “Está bien, puedo manejar esto. No se preocupe.” Then walks over to her and hugs her.  
She nods, lets go of Ray, kissing him on both cheeks, and then walking away.  
Ray walks to the door and exits through it, Joel following. He closes the door behind him and to the outside foyer.  
The look on Ray’s face pains Joel almost as much as the look Ray has when he was hurt yesterday, but this look he has now is a different kind of hurt.  
“I’m sorry, Ray, fuck- I’m so, so sorry. My friends left me behind and I chased after them and I had to dodge cars to get to theirs and...” He stops, feeling extremely hot and light headed.  
He takes a shaky step back, legs feeling like jelly. He grips the old brick of the wall before feeling a sense of falling and everything fading into black before he hits the ground.  
-  
When he finally opens his eyes, the sun is now fading in the horizon. His eyelids feel as heavy as lead and his vision blurry but, quickly becomes as clear as before.  
He feels cold leather under his back and bare arms, the smell of food still strong in the air and the sound of video game gun shots silent.  
He sees the white, crowned ceiling, leading into pale green walls that are covered in photographs and paintings.  
To snap him out of looking around in his position is someone yelling “Hey, Ray, your boyfriend is up!”  
Ray replies, his footsteps walking towards Joel and the other teen “He’s not my boyfriend, Michael.” When he comes into the living room, Joel sees that Ray’s cheeks are red.  
“Bullshit, Ray. You’re more red than hell itself.” Who Joel assumes as Michael chuckles.  
Joel looks at Michael, noticing the teen’s red hair that’s sticking out from under his beanie, his relatively pale skin for being in Texas and glasses, thinner than Ray’s, on the teen’s face.  
Joel lets out a groan and the fading sun is blocked by Ray’s body and a cold sensation is placed on Joel’s head.  
“Thanks.” Joel croaks, his throat feeling dry and his head aching.  
“Here, this is all we have. It’s strawberry.” Ray nods, handing Joel a bottle of pink coloured flavored water.  
Joel quickly undoes the wide cap of the bottle before downing the all the water inside, it isn’t long before he finishes it off and places the empty bottle on the large wooden coffee table.  
“And Gavin was worried he wouldn’t like it.” Ray mumbles to himself.  
Michael hears what Ray said and comments “Gavin’s a fucking idiot. What did you expect?”  
“Um, Ray… What happened?” Joel asks, before Michael and Ray could argue an Joel’s relaxed legs on the couch and replies “You passed out, looks like you haven't eaten all day and, I’m sure that the hoodie you had with you didn’t help either.”  
“I’m sorry.” He apologizes, looking at Ray.  
“Don’t apologize. Why didn’t you eat lunch?” Ray asks.  
“I want to buy you- where are they?” Joel asks, propping up on his eyebrows, looking around, ignoring the throbbing in his head.  
“Where’s what?” Ray asks.  
Joel starts feeling light headed again and lies back down on the couch, the cold on the back and front of his head feeling nice.  
“The roses, I bought for you. I bought you a few roses. Were they ruined?” Joel replies, starting to feel a fluttering feeling in his chest and his hands starting to feel clammy.  
“They’re fine. My grandma got Michael to put them in a vase while Gavin and I put you on the couch.” Ray explains, putting a hand on Joel’s forearm.  
Ray’s hand feels clammy yet soft but, Joel doesn’t mind.  
“Thanks.” Joel smiles.  
Ray’s cheeks turn a faint shade of pink as he asks “Why did you buy me roses?”  
“I did it because, well, I felt bad. I didn’t mean to leave you to dry, my family are a bunch of assholes.” Joel replies.  
“You didn’t have to do that.” Ray says, looking at Joel.  
“I didn’t want you to be heartbroken.” Joel points out then quickly adding “God, that sounds really cheesy.”  
Michael groans, making Ray jump up from where he’s sitting, a blush now more notiable.  
“Just make out already, I won’t even look if that makes you feel better.” Michael chuckles.  
Before Ray could say anything back his grandmother shouts, her voice filling up the whole house “Es la hora de la cena!”  
There’s silence before Ray translates “It's dinner time!”  
The sounds of foot steps from the main hall towards the kitchen and a loud British voice shouting “C’mon, get up you bloody nods, there’s food!”  
Joel slowly gets up but Ray interferes by saying “I’ll get your food.” The older teen lies back down, watching Michael and Ray walk to the kitchen.  
Ray exits with two plates and walks back to joel who is slowly getting up from his former position.  
Joel sees what’s on the plates and with an arched eyebrow asks, “Tacos? Really?”  
“Shut up.” Ray chuckles, then adding, “I’ll eat yours if you don’t want it.”  
“I’m not saying that I didn’t want it.” Joel defends, watching Ray put the plates on the coffee table  
The plates are put down and Joel grabs the first yellow plate and takes a bite of the taco on it, that’s when heat burns his tongue and travels down his throat. Joel lets out a cough, his eyes watering. The heat now feeling like fire in his mouth.  
“Oh shit.. Oh shit. Hold on, I’ll get you some milk.” Ray says, his expression switching to worried as he quickly gets up and darts back into the kitchen.  
Joel holds his chest with one hand and wiping his face with another.  
Michael walks back from the kitchen, his own plate in hand.  
Joel moves his hand from his chest to his throat, hoping that rubbing it will dull the pain.  
“Getting ready to suck cock?” Michael jokingly asks as he sits on the rocking chair.  
“Shut up, Michael!” Ray shouts, taking the words out of Joel’s mouth.  
He hears Ray’s grandma scold Ray before he walks back to the two teens, a glass of milk in hand.  
Ray sits down beside Joel and hand him the glass of milk, Joel eagerly accepting it and quickly drinking it as if his left was dependant on it.  
“Eager for that white stuff?” Michael asks Joel, chuckling afterwards.  
“Like you aren’t, Micool?” Someone else pipes up.  
Another teen walks into the living room, who Joel assumes is gavin. His hair is messy and a sandy blonde colour, his nose large and his green eyes holding mischief.  
“F you, Gavin. Als don’t call me ‘Micool’” Michael growls, obviously holding back what he wants to say.  
“Aww, Mikey when do you have a filter?” Ray asks, chuckling before grabbing his plate and taking a bite out of his taco.  
“This isn’t my house or XBox Live-” Michael starts.  
“Or work.” Ray points out.  
Michael gives Ray a look before continuing “It’s your grandmother’s house and she reminds me of my grandmother and I wouldn’t swear in front of her, no matter how much I want to smash Gavin’s face into the wall.”  
“Well you would just smash his nose, not even his face.” Ray chuckles.  
Joel finds himself smiling, picking up his plate and starting to eat, the taco not as hot as Ray’s. Ray moves closer to Joel as he quickly eats his food and putting the plate down, surprising Ray that he didn’t eat the plate as well.  
“So are you going out with Ray?” Michael asks, taking a drink from his bottle of Coke.  
Before either Ray or Joel could object Gavin butts in by pointing out to Michael “Of course, Micool. That’s all he talked about last night.”  
“Shut up, Gavin… I didn’t talk about him… That much.” Ray grumbles, his cheeks going red.  
Joel’s cheeks go the same colour as he looks to Ray.  
“Did you really?” He asks, before looking away and taking another bite of his taco.  
Ray sheepishly nods, feeling more embarrassed now and Gavin and Michael still laughing.  
“Don’t worry about it.” Joel comforts by giving Ray a small smile even though he’s red in the cheeks as well.  
Gavin and Michael stay until the street lights go on and they say their goodbyes, Michael hugging Ray’s grandmother and, putting in one more joke about Ray’s cock when his grandmother was out of earshot. before leaving the house.  
As soon as Ray locks the door, Joel sits back on the couch, making room for Ray, and a smile planted on his face.  
Ray walks from the door to the couch and sits beside Joel, carefully holding his hand.  
“I like really you.” He admits, not looking at Joel but rather his knees.  
Joel’s heart flutters, he hopes that he isn’t just hearing things and his mind isn’t just playing tricks on him.  
“You mean it?” He asks, biting the inside of his cheek.  
Ray nods, a smile breaking out on his face.  
The words almost escape Joel’s lips but is interrupted with the vibrations coming from his phone and spread down his leg.  
Ray notices it and looks at Joel, he says, “Don’t worry about it.”  
The vibrations die down and come back quickly then die down, Joel knowing that each vibration is someone sending him a message. Joel now becoming annoyed at whoever is texting him.  
By the fifth vibration Ray suggest “You should answer it, maybe it’s your parents. You’re somewhere new, they’re probably wondering where you are.”  
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” Joel apologizes.  
“It’s okay. If it was my grandmother, she would find me and drag me out of the place I’m at.” Ray smiles, feeling more at ease around Joel.  
Joel takes out his phone and notices that who texted him wasn’t Geoff, or Gus, or even Kathleen asking why he was late for school but, it was Matt. Matt never texted.  
Joel also noticed that he called half an hour prior but, Joel didn’t notice because he was eating and talking to Michael and Gavin.  
When Joel starts to read the text messages, he feels everything go still and his heart once swelling with love, break into a million pieces.  
It starts with “Joel, where are you?” then “I’m serious Joel.”  
Details become clear when Matt sent “I’m serious Joel, Geoff is hurt.” and “He’s in the hospital. Kara found him in the washroom at home.”  
The final text message makes everything worse and makes what was once a sense of happiness, crash and burn into sadness and guilt “Joel, your bestfriend is in the hospital and they aren’t sure he’s going to make it. Joel, you need to reply. Everything is a mess and I need to get in touch with you.”


	3. Scar Tissue

As quick as Joel can he calls Matt, his heart pounding in his chest, not able to hear what Ray is asking him. He doesn’t care if tears are streaming down his face, he doesn’t care if Ray is looking at him with fear stricken eyes, and he certainly doesn’t care how angry he sounds when Matt picks up the phone.  
“Joel-” He starts, Joel interrupting.  
“Matt, what the fuck is going on? Seriously Matt!”  
Joel can’t look at Ray because of how angry he sounds and distraught must look right now. His fingers running through his already messy hair.  
“Joel, Joel. Calm the fuck down and I’ll explain everything, take a deep breathe.” Matt instructs.  
It was hard for Joel to take a breath and calm down when his anxiety and stress levels go through the roof.  
“Joel, take a breath, now. I don’t need you getting upset too.” Matt continues.  
It was no surprise that the others in the house referred to him as Sarge.  
Much to Joel’s dislike, he takes a deep breath, wiping his face of any tears on his face with his bare forearm then wiping his arm onto his grey uniform pants.  
“See don’t you feel better?” Matt asks, his tone not as strict.  
“Yeah.” Joel grumbles, hating when Matt was right.  
“Alright. When Kara got home she found Geoff in the bathroom. Gus drove everyone home because Geoff wasn’t feeling well.” Matt pauses, sighing, “At least we now know why he went home. He broke the mirror in the bathroom and cut himself with one of the shards. Kara isn’t doing too well, she’s blaming herself for what happened. Do you want me to come and get you so we can go over there?”   
“Yeah. Thanks, Matt.” Joel replies, his voice low, he then gives Matt Ray’s address before hanging up.  
The pink once on Joel’s cheeks is long gone, replaced with the red of crying.  
“What happened?” Ray asks, his eyes holding worry and his forehead creased.  
“My friend is in the hospital, my car-dad is going to bring me there.” Joel replies, not wanting to call Matt his caretaker because after all these years even though Matt is his caretaker, he’s more of a dad than his own ever was.  
“Oh, I’m sorry, Joel. I’m so sorry.” Ray says, looking away from the older teen.  
Joel stuffs his phone in his pocket and putting his hands over Ray’s own that are resting on Ray’s uniform pants covered legs.  
“It’s okay, Ray. It’s going to be okay.” Joel nods, swallowing hard, convincing himself more than Ray.  
Ray nods silently and wipes his hand across Joel’s face, collecting the tears using his palm  
“He’ll be okay.” Joel promises, running his fingers through his hair once more.  
“He will Joel, don’t worry.” Ray assures, cupping Joel’s face in his hands.  
Joel’s hands wrap loosely around Ray’s midsection, so he doesn’t hurt the younger teen.  
“I could kiss you right now.” Joel whispers.  
“Then do it.” Ray says quickly.  
Joel looks from Ray’s lips to his bruised cheeks and dark eyes and sees that his cheeks are red, even if they’re covered in purple bruises.  
The world feels quiet and numb, not even the feeling of Joel’s torn heart or the terrible news looming over Joel’s head can ruin the moment.  
Joel leans in and kisses Ray on the lips, Ray putting his hands from Joel’s face to link behind Joel’s neck and pulling Joel closer to him.   
Joel moves his hands. up and down Ray’s sides, feeling him up, and deepening the kiss with the younger teen.  
Ray breaks the kiss and says, “Be mine.”  
“That’s really cheesy.” Joel chuckles softly, then asks, “Will you go out with me?”  
Ray nods and kisses Joel once more, showing affection towards the older teen and hoping that the other teen will feel less pain. Until he hears his grandmother come into the room. He kisses Joel until his grandmother starts to scold Ray for kissing on her new couch.  
He wasn’t surprised that his grandmother was only upset that they are kissing on her new couch. She was okay with Ray being gay, even where they lived, she didn’t mind. It took some explaining when Ray was twelve about how he felt, and afterwards she took him out for ice cream and asked if there was any boys at the mall he liked.  
When she finish scolding Ray, she tells him something that Joel can’t make out. He only sees Ray get up and leave for the kitchen, his grandmother replaces him. Ray goes into the kitchen and goes into the fridge to grab the apple pie that he was supposed to give Joel earlier that morning.  
When Joel didn’t show up, Ray kept the pie in his locker until lunch where he walked home, explained to his grandma what happened and she put the pie in the fridge for him.  
The kitchen has wallpaper on one half of the room with different fruits on it, from bananas, to strawberries to pears and the other half on the side where the cabinets, and stove are has white tile. The cabinets on the walls are white with fake wood handles, old vases, pots and kettles on top of them, collecting spiderwebs and dust because his grandmother could not reach up there without a chair and when she got up high she became very dizzy and that made Ray worry. The countertops are a greyish- blue, to look like granite but it was fake, the rest of the counter has the same colored tile as the wall.   
He grabs the pie from the fridge and shuts it with his hip before walking back to the living room.  
When he leaves the kitchen, pie container in hand, he sees his grandma holding Joel, Joel holding her back with tears in his eyes and streaming down his face.  
“Está bien, tu amigo va a estar bien.” His grandmother assures, trying to comfort the teen “¿quiere oir una historia sobre Ray cuando era un niño pequeño-?”   
Ray interrupts with “¡Abuelita!”  
The two look at the younger teen.  
“Sorry, Joel. She was about to tell you something really embarrassing.” Ray apologizes to the older teen.  
Joel sits up straight, letting go of the smaller, older woman and wiping his face clear of fresh tears. He was surprised by how much he has cried today, usually he kept it all on the inside, hid it from everyone, he got better at expressing his feelings but, he never cried.  
“What’s that?” Joel asks, followed by a bit of sniffling.  
“A pie, I was supposed to give it to you before school. My grandma gave it to me for you.” Ray explains, putting the pie container on the coffee table.  
Joel looks to Ray’s grandma and in poorly spoken Spanish he says “Gracias.”  
She smiles and nod, understanding what Joel said to her.  
Ray feels a fluttering in his chest.  
No one has ever tried to directly talk to Ray’s grandma, Ray has always been her translator and a translator for whoever she’s talking to except for her family and close friends.  
His grandma slowly gets up with Ray’s assistance and goes to her bedroom, telling Ray that she is going to lie down.  
Ray sits down in her place and asks “Are you okay?”  
“I don’t know, I just hope he’s alright.” Joel replies, sadness filling him up.  
Ray lens in and kisses Joel once more; hoping to help Joel feel better.  
“Thank you.” Joel whispers, his face close to Ray’s face.  
“Anytime, I like kissing you. I’d do anything to make you feel better.” Ray whispers back.  
When Ray kisses Joel, Joel feels a bit better. That his kisses string his heart back together, after the nuclear blast of news about Geoff torn it apart.   
“I still can’t believe you said yes.” Joel smiles, his fingers now splayed out on Ray’s knee.  
“Yeah, I can’t believe I said yes.” Ray jokes.  
Joel looks at Ray and gives him a small smile, a sign that Ray is helping.  
“Joel, can I ask you something?” Ray asks, putting his hands on Joel’s.  
Joel nods and replies with “Sure.”  
“Can I draw you for the art festival?” Ray asks, looking down at his knees.  
Joel replies “I don’t think anyone wants to look at a drawing at me.”  
“You’ll look fine, Joel. You have a nice face.” Ray says.  
“Your face is nicer.” Joel comments.  
Ray smiles a little bit and says, “You face and body isn’t covered in bruises.”  
“You still look really nice.” Joel points out.  
“So do you and since I can't make a self portrait you have to be my project.” Ray explains.  
Before Joel could reply, the sound of a car horn can be heard from outside.  
“That’s Matt.” Joel says, looking away from Ray.  
The light hearted mood that Joel felt, all comes crashing down; the sound reminding him that he has to see his best friend in pain.  
Ray nods and gets up, Joel sees him go to the dining table, where Joel’s back and hoodie are. Ray tries to pick up Joel’s bag but, Joel gets up and says “It’s okay, I can carry it.”  
He walks over and picks up the bag with ease, swinging it onto his back, the hoodie placed over Joel’s left arm. Ray goes to the the kitchen and comes back with another bottle of pink vitaminwater.  
“Sorry we don’t have any other flavours.” Ray apologizes, handing Joel the bottle.  
“It’s alright, I like this flavour anyway.” Joel smiles.  
Ray walks with Joel to the door, and opens it for Joel.  
Joel leans in and gives Ray a soft one armed hug, thanking him for everything and apologizing for ‘being a dick’.  
Before Joel leaves Ray scurries away from the door, grabs the pie from the table, goes back and hands it to Joel.  
“You almost forgot it.” Ray comments.  
Joel looks at it and responds “Thank you, Ray. Tell your grandma I say bye.”  
Ray nods and gives Joel a small wave while saying “Good-bye. See you tomorrow.”  
“Maybe I’ll come in tomorrow, you have first lunch right?”  
Ray nods and Joel continues, “I’ll possibly see you then.”  
“If it helps, I sit in the science hallway by the library.” Ray explains, feeling slightly flustered.  
“Thanks.” Joel nods, giving Ray a small smile before exiting through the door and then through the glass door to the cool outdoors.  
The sun is almost down, the stars are starting to show along with the moon.  
Joel swiftly goes down the stairs and sees Matt’s sleek, new black car in the pavement covered driveway.  
After Geoff got the rusty van, Matt got a new car. Geoff always said- the thought of Geoff makes Joel’s heart break again, making him want another kiss from Ray lips.  
Joel takes another deep breath and opens the door to the car, slides into the car and shuts the door behind him, setting his backpack and hoodie in the back seat and the apple pie in his lap, a secure hand holding it in place.  
“Nice house.” Matt comments, reversing out of the driveway.  
“It’s my boyfriend’s.” Joel responds soon after.  
Matt looks to Joel for a second then back behind him as he backs out and asks “Wait, you have a boyfriend?”  
“You didn’t know I was gay?” Joel asks, looking at Matt.  
At the start of grade nine Joel finally came to terms of his sexuality and bit by bit told the others in the house. People like Kara, Kathleen and Geoff were a great support to the teen. Kara even saying that she’ll take on any of the bullies that try to pick on Joel. Gus and Burnie were a bit weary, they didn’t hate him or anything, it was something sudden and something new but, as a couple of months passed, everything became back to normal once Joel, along with Geoff, explained to them that Joel wasn’t going to change in anyway, and he’s still the same Joel, except he likes guys. Now Burnie and Gus are back to the way they were with Joel, no more odd glances or fearing that Joel was going to hit on them.  
“You did tell me, Joel. You don’t remember calling me because you were scared to go to gym class because you were afraid that word got out and you were going to be beat up?”  
“Yeah.” Joel swallows, remembering that day.  
A week after Joel came out, word got around to his first high school, now Joel wasn’t a social kid to the begin with and the thought of being at his most vulnerable, changing in the guys changing room giving him a panic attack and Matt let him go home and the drive home, told Joel how he can’t live his life in fear, being the Sarge everyone knows.  
“When did you get this boyfriend?” Matt asks, pulling out of the driveway fully and driving away from the house.  
“It was the boy I saved. I was at his house and I asked him out.” Joel responds.  
“Did he give you that pie?” Matt asks, driving onto the main road. Joel nods and Matt points out, “You know what pie is a metaphor-”  
Joel interrupts by saying “No! Matt! What the fuck!”  
Matt chuckles and says,“See, I can be amusing.” Matt’s chuckles die down soon after and asks, “Seriously though, are you sure having a boyfriend right now is a good idea?”  
Joel defends by saying “It’s fine, Matter. I really like him.”  
Matt nods and agrees “Fine, whatever you say.”  
The rest of the car ride seems short and is in total silence. Even the car’s noises are quiet, something that Joel is never much not used to.  
Matt pulls into the barley empty drugstore parking lot, the sign of the store half lit up.   
“Why are you parking here? The hospital is across the street?” Joel asks, looking at the older man.  
“I don’t feel like paying sixteen dollars everytime I drop one of you guys off here. I buy a candy bar or something to even out the karma.”  
Joel arches an eyebrow and asks “I thought you didn’t believe in karma?”  
Matt takes the keys out of the ignition and replies “Well, I’m not taking any chances getting this car towed.”  
Matt gets out and Joel does too, and they both walk into the drugstore.  
The inside is blank, posters for new perfumes line the walls along with a giant logo of the company, shelves stocked with valentine's day gifts, gum, and magazines.  
“Get a pack of gum or something, I’ll pay. I have to go get some things for the house” Matt says before walking off.  
Joel nods and wanders past the magazine section and to the shelves of candy and gum.  
He grabs the first gum pack he can see and looks over to find Matt. He walks past the magazine section again but, notices something that catches his eye.   
He looks over to see the Minecraft Annual 2014 and his eyebrows furrow and he feels sad once more, reminding himself that they are a few feet away from where Geoff is.  
He looks down at the linoleum floor and becomes lost in thought until Matt drags him back to his senses.  
“Joel.” He says, making Joel look at him then asking “Are you ready to pay?”  
Feeling like a five year old he replies, “I feel scared.”  
“Joel, there’s no reason to feel scared. You won’t see his injuries.” Matt comforts.  
Joel lets out a sigh and counters with, “I feel like it’s my fault.”  
“Fuck.” Matt sighs.  
Joel looks at Matt, forehead creased.  
“What?” He asks.  
“I can’t keep it from you.” Matt sighs.  
Joel’s eyes go wide, panic striking through him as he asks “Keep what? Is Geoff dead?”  
Matt shakes his head and replies, “No. No. No. He wanted to be dead, Burnie found this note on your bed and he looked at it and saw it was for you.”   
He takes a piece of paper out of his sweatshirt pocket. He hands it to Joel, he takes a deep breath before opening the note and starting to read.  
Joel,  
I’m sorry however you found this note and how you found out that I died.  
I can’t take anymore, I’m living in a pit, I have nowhere to go. I’m working at a dead end hardware store and chasing after a girl who I don’t even think likes me in anyway. After highschool I have no plans and there’s no way I’m getting a scholarship. I have nothing but the clothes on my back and shoes on my feet.  
Please take the money that I have hidden under my mattress, use it for the trip to California or a startup to buy a new van; I’m serious that think is going to kill someone, or blow up.   
Joel, please take care of the others, make sure that I'm not forgotten and most of all, be happy. Be with Ray or whoever, go to California with the others after graduation. Maybe my soul will haunt the van and it’ll be like I’m there in a paranormal way.  
You’re a brother to me, my best friend, and most of all, you gave me more of a family than anyone ever has. Life is temporary, why not make it worth it then?  
Thank you for everything,  
Geoff

Joel looks down at the note and looks up at Matt.  
“I have to turn that into the cops/ Joel he loves you, will you please see him?” Matt asks.  
Joel replies with a nod, handing Matt back the note.  
Matt pays for Joel’s pack of gum, they leave the drug store and soon cross the street to the hospital.  
when they walk through the automatic doors, a sense of Joel’s past comes back to him. It wasn’t when Geoff broke his arm or when Burnie got stung by bees in the park, the memories are much older than that.  
There are memories of his mother and back when she first got sick. Joel still remembers the area she was in, he called it the ‘End of the line’ area, because he knew she was going to die, if it didn’t show with her decreasing weight, it showed through her dying spirit.  
The gift shop still stands where she went with him once and bought him a teddy bear which he named ‘Cinnamon’ in hopes of cheering Joel up. Joel still has that teddy bear, hidden under his pillow, sometimes when his anxiety is high at home he take it out and holds it, mostly is calms him down but sometimes it makes him miss his mother more.  
Almost everyone has something from their parents, either when they left them in the foster care or when they died. Geoff doesn’t have anything, he took everything that reminded him of his mother and with Matt’s help burned everything in a big bon fire outside.  
The ceiling of the lobby is tall, showing parts of the other floors, the floors are made of dark green linoleum, and the walls ranging from white to red. A desk sits in the middle of the lobby, two coffee shops on each side of the room and the gift shop in the far left corner of the lobby. From the lobby there’s a massive hallway where Matt leads Joel to the elevators, farther down the hall even though Joel knows the way.  
The two men are quiet until the elevator comes and they quickly get in.  
They remain quiet until Joel says “I don’t think I can do this.”  
“You can.” Matt simply replies, pressing the button with the number seven on it.  
“This is where my mom died.” Joel says, his voice deadpan.  
“Joel-” Matt starts, going to provide Joel comfort.  
Joel continues “I don’t want Geoff to die.”  
Matt lets out a sigh and looks at Joel before speaking, “He’s not, I promise you. He’s going to be alright.”  
Joel looks at Matt and asks, “Promise?”  
Matt is taken aback, the last time someone asked him that it was when Geoff made him promise he’ll meet his mother.  
“Yeah... I... I promise.” Matt forces himself to say, not knowing any other way to respond.  
The elevator doors open once more and they exit, as soon as they exit, Joel instantly recognizes the floor as the children’s floor, obvious by various insects, flowers and other things that would make an otherwise dreadful place somewhat happy.  
His mother used to have one of the nurses bring him up here in order to play with the other children that were here while she was given her medication.  
Matt leads Joel through more painted hallways until they reach room ‘711’ and Joel asks, “Why is Geoff in the children’s unit?”  
“It also deals with teenagers who have been in accidents.”Matt replies.  
Matt soon enters the room first and Joel enters behind him. Matt pulls open the teal curtain and Joel sees Geoff. He’s laying on the hospital bed, the thin blanket up to under his arms, an oxygen mask over his mouth a nose, tubes coming from his arm and his left arm is covered up in clean white bandages from the start of his wrist to just below his elbow.  
“I’m going to go home, want me to put the pie in the fridge?” Matt asks.  
Joel simply nods, still looking at his best friend.  
“Are you good with getting home by yourself?” Matt asks.  
Joel doesn’t realize what Matt says and just nods.  
When Matt leaves the room, Joel returns to his sense and says “What?”  
He realizes that Matt is gone he grumbles, “Fuck.” and walks over to Geoff’s bedside to take a seat.  
“I really wish you were awake but it would make it harder for me to get the words out. I guess this is a response to your letter.” Joel explains, clasping his hands together, his fingers intertwining.  
He looks at the white wall with a brightly colored sunflower painted on it.  
“I read your note, Geoff. Firstly, you’re the one who decided to plan this trip, without you there is no trip. We all made that pact to go together, as a family. Secondly, I don’t think that you can possess a van, and I’m not taking any money that belongs to you in order to get a new van. I don’t want to lose you, Geoff. You’re my family and I don’t want you to die. I’m sitting in a damn hospital where I spent a good chunk of my childhood and watched my mom die but, I’m here because you’re here. We’ve built up up such a strong bond that I’m willing to embrace my past in order to make sure that you are alright and see to make sure you see tomorrow!” He continues, getting upset “I’m guessing you want something other than people giving you shit and getting upset at you. It’s not your fault, I thought you were going to get help and you were going to be okay. I didn’t know you were suicidal! Geoff, you promised to get help!”  
There’s no response from Joel as he expected but, he feels himself getting choked up.  
Joel gets up and whispers, “Please be okay.” Before taking Geoff’s non-injuries arm and squeezing his hand then letting go and walking out of the room, his heart breaking each step he takes out of the room.  
He manages to find enough for bus fare and gets on the bus, having to run to the stop in order to get on it. He takes a seat in the back, the bus almost empty. He feels cold but, the feeling of sadness keeps him warm enough for the ride home.  
He wishes he had someone to talk to, realizing that he doesn't have Ray’s phone number if he has a phone at all. That idea only makes the bus ride all the more lonely.  
Once Joel gets to his street, the sun has set and the moon and the stars have risen in the sky.Darkness consuming the city, the only light is the street lights and headlights on cars. The shops have longed closed, their blackened store fronts signalling the end of a long day.  
In an otherwise barley litten neighbourhood, his house illuminates, all the lights on and Joel sees it as a beacon of home.  
He steps onto the porch and knocks on the door.  
Kara soon opens it, her expression as grim and tired as Joel’s, her eyes red from crying.  
“Hey.” Joel says, before pulling her into a tight bear hug.  
They both know it’s out of Joel’s character but today would change anyone’s perspective on life, their best friend and brother is in the hospital. Kara going through a rough time because she saw Geoff’s body and Joel going through a rough time because he was the closest to Geoff out of all of them.  
“Are you feeling better, Matt said you were a mess?” She asks, hugging him back tightly.  
“Yeah, I’m better. How are you?” Joel asks in turn.  
She shakes her head and replies “I still see the image of him.”  
“He’ll be okay.” Joel promises.  
Kara nods and pulls away from him before going into the house, leaving the door open for Joel.  
Joel enters and closes and locks the door behind him. He takes off his shoes and walks to his room, stopping at the kitchen when he sees Burnie and Gus at the kitchen table eating. Joel walks into the kitchen and asks, “What are you eating?”  
The two other teens look at Joel and he notices the pie container on the table, two slices on plate for Burnie and Gus.   
‘What the fuck!?” Joel exclaims, his eyebrows furrowing.  
Gus arches his eyebrows and asks in an offended tone “What?”  
“That’s my fucking pie!”  
“Haha, pie.” Burnie chuckles.  
Joel looks to Burnie and growls “Shut up, Burnie.”  
“Joel, the pie doesn’t have your name on it.” Gus points out, putting his fork onto his plate.  
“I got that from Ray’s grandmother!” Joel explains, still angry.  
“Who’s Ray?” Burnie asks.  
Joel wanting to get his pie back, quickly replying, “My boyfriend.”  
“You have a boyfriend?” Gus asks, raising an eyebrow.  
Joel lets out a sigh before responding, “Yes. Now give me back his pie!”  
Burnie and Gus chuckle, and Burnie says, “Pie.” before the two teens start chuckling again.  
Joel grabs the pie container, more than half the pie still in it and Gus’ fork then heads off to their shared room, closing the door behind him.  
Joel sits on Geoff’s unmade bed, the headboard covered in designs that were carved into it with a kitchen knife when Geoff got bored. Joel’s name along with the others carved at the top of the rectangular wooden headboard. He sits on top of the top sheet and stares up at the white ceiling then starts to eat his still surprisingly warm pie.  
His head still clouded with worry and his heart feels heavy but, he feels content as he’s going to get. The room feels and sounds quiet, the world feeling at ease even though his head is swirling from what happened today. All is quiet in the room until a hard object hits off the window causing Joel to jump and snap back into reality. He looks out the window, expecting a dead bird but instead finds a young teenage girl, around Joel’s age, retracting her arm from out of the window, obvious that she threw whatever hit the window. Her hair is blonde, a piercing through both sides of her nose, and almost as many tattoos as Geoff. Joel instantly knows who she is; Griffon, the girl that Geoff always talks about and really likes. Joel’s pretty sure she’s just had a longer conversation with him by throwing something heavy at the window than Geoff has ever had with her.  
She waves at Joel and he waves back. She holds up a finger, indicating to give her a moment, and Joel nods. She goes away from the window for a moment, then returns with a big sketch pad and a thick permanent marker.  
She scribbles down something then presses the pad up against the window showing what she wrote down.  
It reads “Where’s Geoff?” in big, neat letters.  
Joel gets off of the bed and on to his feet, trying to figure out how to respond. He finds a stack of blank paper, and a permanent marker, he grabs that along with tape and heads back to the bed, writing up his response.  
He sticks two pieces of written paper together with the tape and holds it up against the window. The pieces read “In the hospital.”  
She write quickly her response, holding it up to the window it reads “Why?”  
He puts his paper down and the marker before holding up his hand, using one of the fingers of his other hand and slides his finger across his wrist.  
She puts a hand over her mouth, horror on her face, understanding what Joel showed her. She quickly writes another message, her writing messy now.  
“Give him my number.” It says, followed by her phone number.   
Joel grabs another piece of paper and copies down the phone number in a rush but, making sure that he writes all the numbers down properly, he gives her a thumbs up, signaling that he has the number written down.  
She nods, writes another message saying “Thank you!” before waving goodbye to Joel. He waves back until she closes the curtains.  
Joel lies back down, looking at the phone number and can’t help but chuckle.  
He says to himself, “I just got a phone number for Geoff.”  
Joel puts the piece of paper in Geoff’s nightstand and continues to eat the pie. His hand holds the bottom of the container and his notices it’s a bit uneven with the rest of it.  
He looks under it, excepting crumbs crushed against the tin container but, instead finds a piece of paper firmly taped to the bottom.  
With his fingernail he scrapes the edge of the tape till the note. He opens it and sees in messy, ink smeared witting, Ray’s name and his phone number.  
Joel’s eyes go wide and he jerks around rapidly, trying to get his phone out of his pocket. With the note in hand and his phone in the other, he types down the number and a simple “Hi” and then sending it.  
He gets up and walks over to his bed, his eyes glued to his phone as he lies down on the soft comforter. The hose usually loud but is deafened by the blood pumping in his ears.  
He grabs Cinnamon from under his pillow and holds him with one arm, giving him a tight squeeze.  
His phone goes off in his hand and he is instantly on it, unlocking it and looking at the message.  
Ray replies with “Who is this?”  
Joel answers with “Joel, from earlier today.”  
Ray soon responds with “Don’t worry, Joel, you’re the only ‘Joel’ I know.”  
Joel chuckles to himself as he types out the next message “I should’ve had a better introduction.”  
“Don’t worry. I was about to head off to bed. Need anything? I thought you were this one kid in my class who keeps asking for the answers for science class” Ray texts.  
“Don’t worry Ray, there are people like that in my grade as well.” Joel replies.  
“So I’m off to bed. Need anything?” Ray asks.  
“Nothing, just needing a kiss from you.” Joel answers, getting cozy on his head  
“That’s fucking cheesy.” Ray replies.  
Joel feels embarrassed, wishing he could take the message back but, feels better when Ray adds “Don’t worry, cheesy jokes are funny.” with a smiley face emoticon.  
“Goodnight, Ray.” Joel says.  
“Goodnight, Joel. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Ray responds with another smiley face.  
Joel locks is phone, places it on the side table before turning his back to the night table , both arms around Cinnamon.  
He felt like a little kid again, he felt happiness even with the looming thought of Geoff dying but, right now he felt hope and happiness, like there was someone out there who gave a fuck that he didn’t live with. A life of being only friends with people he lived with and meeting Ray’s friends today was something Joel hasn’t experienced in a while, not since his mom was in the hospital and he always went to the children’s ward and played with the other kids. He also felt sad, sad for Geoff not being on the bed across from him, drawing new tattoo ideas or attempting to study for a test the next day, tonight he’s in a hospital bed. All Joel hopes as he drifts off into a dark sleep that Geoff’s okay and when he wakes up tomorrow that his relationship with Ray isn’t just a dream.


	4. My Fault

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the longest chapter I have ever written. I just want to say thank you to everyone who has read this and keep coming back for moe chapters. I'm sorry that I've been a bit behind, my grandma has been sick and so have I and I haven't been in the best state of mind but, I have been workign away with the fic and I hope everyone enjoys it <3

The next morning Matt let Joel and the others stay home and said that they’re all going to go to the hospital when he gets home. None of the teens disagreed, all going back to sleep, hoping to catch a few more hours of sleep before they start their first stay at home day, they have all had in a while.  
The whole morning Joel lays in bed, blocking out the loud arguing and video game sound effects and dialogue and texting Ray. The first text that Joel first sent started out as an apology for not showing up that day and promises that Ray can come over after school, Ray accepts the apology quickly and they start to talk, in turn filling Joel’s morning.  
Going back and forth with Ray, at one point they play a couple of rounds of 21 questions and try to beat each others scores on app games they both have. This goes on until his third period where he explains that his teacher would kill him if she found out he was texting in her class.  
By the afternoon came and it was 2:30, Joel had cleaned up a bit. Showering and changing out of his pyjamas and into a clean sweatshirt and shorts, his way a dressing up.  
The teen quickly microwaves pasta that was for dinner the night before, anxious for Ray’s arrival.  
When the doorbell rings, Gus calls “I’ll get it!” and before Joel could say anything, he can see Gus opening the door and looking at who is on the other side of the door.  
“Who are you?” Gus asks, his tone annoyed.  
Joel’s suspicions are confirmed when the person at the door replies in a shaky voice, “I’m here for Joel.”  
Joel rushes to the door, pushing Gus out of the way and holding the door frame and looking down at Ray.  
“Hi, Joel.” Ray smiles weakly, his voice still nervous.  
Joel smiles back and says, “Hey.” before leaning down and kissing the younger teen, any stress he feels the night before disappear.  
Gus makes fake puking noises behind Joel before leaving to the couch.  
Joel looks at Ray for a while until Burnie yells from the couch “You’re letting the AC out! Get him inside!”  
Joel and Ray tense up, both going red. An embarrassed Joel moves aside for an equally embarrassed Ray to come inside.  
Ray takes off his shoes and sets his bag by the back of the couch carefully, as if to not makes a lot of commotion in the house so no attention is drawn to him.  
Joel leads Ray to his room, Ray cautious about going in.  
“Are you okay?” Joel asks, looking back at the younger teen who is at the doorway, holding on to the side.  
Ray nods before asking “Are we allowed in here, Joel?”  
Joel nods and replies “It’s fine. We can go in the basement if you’re uncomfortable.”  
“It’s okay, I just don’t want you to get in trouble with your brothers.”  
Joel lets out a chuckle and explains “They’re not my brothers. This is a group home, we see each other as siblings, but we’re not blood related. Do you think I want to be blood related to Burnie?”  
Ray’s cheeks go red from embarrassment.  
Joel puts his hand on Ray’s warm cheek, “It’s alright, no need to worry. It’s a common mistake.”  
He leans in and kisses the younger teen on his forehead.  
Ray nods, feeling tense under Joel’s grip and his face still flushed.  
“What’s wrong?” Joel asks, looking down at Ray.  
“I’m still embarrassed.” Ray says.  
Joel kisses Ray on the lips before saying “Don’t be, Ray. Everyone says it.”  
“Anything else wrong?” Joel asks, moving his hand from Ray’s face and linking fingers linking with the other teens.  
“I feel like I should go home.” Ray replies, looking down.  
“Why?” Joel Asks, feeling hurt by Ray’s response.  
Ray shrugs and replies “I have a lot of homework to do and I want to finish it so my grandma doesn’t go angry at me. She told me yesterday how that my grades should not slip because I’m going out with you.”  
Joel let’s go of Ray and asks “What is it?”  
“Geography.” Ray replies.  
Joel shrugs and says “That’s easy.”  
Ray looks down and mumbles “Maybe for you.”  
“I can help.” Joel suggests.  
Ray looks up and asks “Really?”  
“I got an 80 in that class.” Joel replies, shrugging.  
Ray arches an eyebrow, speaking with a grin, “Wow, that’s better than I’ll ever get. Also I‘m having a hard time with Economics.”  
Joel’s forehead crease and his eyebrows raise as he asks “Wait, Economics?”  
Ray nods and replies “Yeah, why?”  
Joel making sure that Ray isn’t joking asks “Economics?”  
“Yeah, it’s a business class. I can figure it out, I was hoping that you knew something that could help me with all these questions.” Ray explains, confused as to why Joel keeps asking him.  
“It’s it an elective?” Joel asks.  
“There wasn’t any elective left, that class was the only one left. I can’t take spares because I’m too young. I wanted to gym to get that class out of the way but, I have to do it next year.” Ray explains.  
“Lucky for you, I got a really high mark in that class before I got expell- transferred. I would’ve been on honour roll.” Joel smiles, correcting himself.  
“Joel, I know you were expelled. Please don’t lie to me.” Ray points out, shoving his hands in his uniform pant pockets.  
“Shit, I’m sorry. Ray, I’m sorry. I’m not used to exposing myself like this, I’m used to being in a web of lies.” Joel apologizes.  
“You have nothing to hide, Joel.” Ray responds, at the end giving Joel a smile.  
Joel nods in agreement and says “I’ll try to be more transparent.”  
He grabs a hold of Ray’s hand as carefully as he can, cautious of Ray’s injuries. Joel leads Ray to his bed and they both sit down on the plush mattress; Ray sitting down slowly while Joel flops downs onto the bed, it squeaking under his weight.  
Ray leans closer to Joel, blushing because he’s not used to being this close to someone on their bed, especially someone he likes.  
“Thanks for having me over today.” Ray says, closing his eyes.  
Joel replies “No problem, it’s nice having you over.”  
“Fuck, your bed is nice.” Ray sighs out, sounding content.  
Joel smiles back and asks “Thanks, it’s really comfy. Want to start working on your homework?”  
“Nope.” Ray replies, opening his eyes.  
“You wanted to about two minutes ago. Aren’t you supposed to be preppy or something?” Joel chuckles, Ray feeling the vibration from Joel’s chest.  
“I’ve always been wise beyond my years.” Ray responds, giving Joel a crooked smile.  
Joel runs his fingers through Ray’s dark hair and points out “We should get started, you don’t want your grandma to get upset at both of us.”  
“I’m starting not to like this whole ‘older therefore wiser’ thing.” Ray chuckles.  
Joel nudges him and says “Get used to it.” sporting a grin similar to Ray’s.  
He gets out of Ray’s loose grip, the younger teen flopping onto Joel’s pillow. He walks in the living room to retrieve Ray’s knapsack, obvious to him that Ray is nervous in the older teen’s house.  
Joel picks up the blue knapsack and he hears Burnie comment “Getting your boyfriend’s stuff? You’re so whipped.” followed by Gus laughing in agreement.  
Joel looks at the two teen, giving them the finger and saying “I’ll say the same fucking thing when you get a girlfriend, Burns.”  
Burnie shrugs and says “I don’t mind.”  
“Dick.” Joel grumbles before walking back to the bedroom.  
As he starts to walk down the hall he hears Burnie shout “Don’t have sex on my bed!”

Joel let out a groan and enters the bedroom, putting the knapsack by the bed before lying down on his bed.  
“I’m sorry.” Ray apologizes.  
Joel faces Ray and kissing the side of his face before saying “It’s not your fault, Ray. Don’t worry about it, I just live with assholes.”  
Ray slowly gets up, leaning on his elbows.  
Joel leans in and kisses Ray’s cheeks, moving to his lips. Ray climbs on top of Joel and Joel puts an arm around the smaller teen, holding him close. Ray places his hands on either side of Joel’s head, kissing the teen more roughly. Joel’s arms move up and he laces his fingers behind Ray’s head, still kissing the younger boy.  
Their kiss is cut short by Kara shouting, “Joel, don’t be fucking in the house!”  
Ray instantly gets off of Joel, sitting upwards on the bed, as far away as he can away from Joel. His face red with embarrassment and his eyes diverted away from Kara and Joel, rather the focus is on the white sheet of Joel’s messy bed.  
Kara walks away from the door, her footsteps being heard as she walks down the hall.  
Ray looks at Joel, his face still red as he mumbles “Sorry.”  
Joel props up onto his elbows, using one hand to put on Ray’s shoulder.  
“Thanks Kara!” Joel shouts.  
She shouts back saying “I don’t want to hear that in the next room!”  
“Like you aren’t loud!” Joel yells back.  
He hears her sharply laugh before replying “You’re being any louder!”  
He grips his blanket before shouting “I’ll tell Tex!”  
The moses from the living room go silent and everyone can hear Gus saying “Ohhhhh!”  
In unison Kara, Joel, and Burnie yelling “Shut up, Gus!” before the video game noises come back on and Kara closes the door to her room.  
Ray moves closer to Joel, getting Joel’s hand off of him and he lies down onto the bed beside the other teen. His fingers intertwines with Joel’s and moves closer to him so their legs and thighs are touching as he says “I’m so sorry. I should’ve heard her coming.”  
Joel puts two fingers over Ray’s lips and replies “It’s fine.” He feels himself starting to calm down, his anger slowly going away from Ray’s touch.  
Ray nods, putting his mouth over Joel’s fingers that are on the other teen’s lips and softly bites them causing Joel to pull them out of Ray’s mouth, and back up onto the headboard, his face flushed.  
Ray starts to laugh, starting to sit up, a sloppy grin on his face and laughs escaping from his mouth.  
“Why did you do that?” Joel asks, trying not to laugh as well.  
To Joel, Ray’s laugh was addicting and it was hard for him not to start laughing along.  
“How else was I supposed to get out of it?” Ray responds, shrugging.  
Joel kisses the top of Ray’s head and suggests “Want to get started?”  
Ray nods and leans over, his uniform pants sagging so Joel gets a good look of Ray’s boxers that Joel can read as ‘Wanna Play’ and the top of a PS3 controller printed on can be seen.  
“Nice boxers.” Joel comments, holding back another laugh.  
“Thanks, my grandma got them for me.”” Ray replies, digging around in his bag, not seeming affected by what he just said.  
Joel’s grin instantly disappears and his eyes go wide as he asks, “What?”  
Ray moves back up, economics textbook and black and white notebook in hand.  
He asks, “Wait, what underwear am I wearing?” Looking towards the far orange covered wall.  
Joel relaxes against the headboard and replies with a smirk, “It says ‘Wanna Play?’ and has a… Is that a PS3 controller.”  
Ray instantly sits back down and says, “Shit.” His face flushed with embarrassment as he adds “Yeah, my grandma got me those.”  
“You’re grandmother buys you your underwear?” Joel asks, biting his lip to hold back a chuckle.  
Ray nods and explains, “She saw that the controller on my boxers were the same as the controller I own, so she got them for me; she doesn’t understand what it says.”  
Joel lets out a chuckle but it quickly dies down by the look that Ray gives him.  
“Okay, I’ll stop. Where do we start?” Joel asks, sitting up, still thinking about Ray’s boxers.  
Ray replies reading from what he wrote down in his notebook “ Page three hundred and twenty, fuck so close.” He chuckles before continuing, “Questions one to seven.” He opens the textbook to the page.  
“Let’s get started.” Joel smiles, taking the textbook from Ray and settling the book in his lap. He reads the first question “List several ways that currency is different from money?”  
“Well..” Ray starts then begins to list “Money is abstract, currency is physical, Currency does not necessarily have value, However, currency can have inherent value, currency can be manipulated, money cannot.” He pauses thinking of the next answer “Currency is almost always regulated by the government, currency can be counterfeited, and.. Fuck, I can’t remember the last one.”  
“Last one is; currency is attached to a fixed numerical value.” Joel replies.  
“Fuck, right.” Ray agrees before starting to write his answers down.  
The pair goes through the rest of the questions, Joel helping Ray and making sure that he understands what Joel is trying to tell him by making him answer the questions in his own way.  
“You should be a teacher.” Ray jokes as they answer the next few questions.  
“I can’t make lesson plans and i’d probably kill everyone.” Joel points out.  
“Happens to the best of us right?” Ray asks jokingly, answering the next question.  
Joel chuckles, putting his arms loosely around Ray’s body, the textbook now in the younger teen’s lap and the notebook resting on his uniform pant clad thigh.  
“It’s boiling in here.” Ray comments soon after, letting out a sigh and putting his pen down.  
“I know.” Joel agrees.  
Ray lean against the blue wall and runs his fingers through his hair.  
“Want to borrow a pair on my shorts?” Joel suggests, worried about the younger teen.  
Ray looks to Joel and asks “Is that okay?”  
Joel nods and gets off the bed, he goes to the foot of the bed where a wooden chest is. He opens it and pulls out a pair of grey shorts and throws them at the younger teen.  
Joel stands back up and goes back to the bed.  
“Don’t look.” Ray says.  
Joel lies down on the bed and covers his eyes with his forearm and says, “I won’t.”  
The younger teen gets up, moving away from the door as much as possible before unbuttoning the front of his uniform pants and sliding them off.  
Joel peeks at Ray’s almost bare bottom half and goes red from what he sees. He was right it was a PS3 controller on the back of his boxers.  
With the shorts in hand Ray starts to slide them on noticing that they are too big for him, hims able to put them in without unbuttoning the front button and zipping down the zipper and when he put them on they started to slide down past his hips to the point where it looks like he's low riding.  
Joel chuckles and Ray turns around as best as he can and notices that Joel’s looking at the younger teen, no longer hiding his eyes or acting like he’s covering his eyes.  
“You dick!” Ray cries, trying not to laugh.  
“What?” Joel asks, acting like nothing ever happened.  
Ray goes over and holds Joel’s arms to his sides and says “Dick.”  
before Joel could respond the front door opens, crashing against the wall and closes loudly which causes Kara to go running out to see what’s wrong and Joel and Ray getting off one another and going to see what is wrong as well. Joel is the first to exit through the front door and hears Gus and Burnie yelling at eachother front the backyard.  
Ray and kara follow and on the way to the backyard Kara says “Nice to meet, I’m Kara.”  
“Ray.” The other teen responds.  
Once they get to the back they see Gus and Burnie across from one another, fists clenched and eyes narrowed at one another, ready to fight each other.  
“Red!” Gus shouts.  
“Blue, you dipshit!” Burnie shouts back.  
“Oh fuck.” Joel groans.  
It was a common thing between the two teens after they played video games long enough, especially Halo . Burnie always played as a blue character and Gus played as a red character.  
The two teens start yelling nonsense to each other before Burnie puts Gus in a headlock that he easily gets out of then pushes Burnie into the dirt.  
“Suck it!” Gus growls.  
Joel sighs and says “Guys, stop it.” then mutters “Jesus fucking Christ.”  
The two look at Joel and Gus snaps, “Burnie is being a dick!”  
Burnie looks to Gus and defends, “You’re being the dick!”  
“What else is new?” Joel mumbles to himself, feeling his anger start to rise up.  
Kara pipes up, “You’re both being dicks!”  
“Please stop, Matt is going to be home soon and I’m pretty fucking sure that he doesn’t want to bring more kids to the fucking hospital, I think one of us is enough, so stop trying to knock each other's fucking teeth out!” Joel explains,trying to not to explode in anger.  
Thoughts of Geoff and how much of a bad friend Joel is, flood his mind, only make his anger worse.  
The two look back to Joel and nod reluctantly, understanding why it’s a bad idea to fight.  
“Fine.” They both say reluctantly before going inside, Kara following them.  
“Good.” Joel says sharply, turning to Ray who can obviously see Joel’s anger.  
Joel and Ray go inside the house soon after, Joel looking extremely tense, his brow furrowed and his jaw set.  
Once they got inside Joel pressed Ray against the green wall of the hallway as softly as possible then connects their lips together. In a kiss of teeth, tongue and lips, Joel feels his stress and anger fade away.When he feels calm once more, he parts the kiss, looking down at Ray whose mouth is hung open and his eyes wide.  
Joel chuckles and grabs Ray’s hand then leads him back to the bedroom and saying “Let’s finish your homework so your grandma doesn’t get angry and slice our throats.”  
Ray nods and follows Joel.  
Burnie saw what just happened and instead of calling them out he noticed something, how quickly Joel changed from before he kissed Ray to after, he doesn’t notice the start of a recurring pattern with Joel’s anger being cured by Ray’s touch.  
\------  
By the next day Joel was back in school and catching up on everything he missed the previous day. Ryan and Jack asked what happened and why Joel missed rehearsal. Joel replied with a quick response, not wanting to get upset in front of the other two teens. They took Joel’s reply and started to fill Joel in on what he missed and the deadline being pushed back another day. Joel also learnt that Jack’s girlfriend was moving to the states next month and Ryan talked about how he hasn’t found the right person yet and Joel kept quiet. It was normal for him to keep quiet about his sexualilty. He kept quiet until Ryan said, “It seems like there are no guys in this school who are openly gay and it’s like trying to find a piece of hay in a needle stack.”  
Which Jack replied with, “Isn’t it a needle in a haystack.”  
Ryan shrugged and said, “Pieces of hay aren’t so painful?”  
Joel didn’t come out and say that he was gay and had a boyfriend he just nodded with Ryan’s response because it was true, he just got lucky with Ray.  
Joel did enjoy most of the day, especially when in between classes he saw Ray standing there by Joel’s locker, looking around for the older teen.  
With a pile of homework by the end of the day, Joel starts to get ready to go to the hospital before going home.  
When he closes his locker, expecting Burnie to be behind the locker door Joel says, “You’re not going to scare me, Burns.”  
He hears a chuckle, not from Burnie though and when he closes the locker door instead of seeing Burnie he sees Ray.  
“Oh, hey.” Joel says, looking slightly embarrassed.  
Ray chuckles and jokes, “Someone is a little paranoid.”  
“Well, that’s what happens when you live with so many people.” Joel responds, chuckling a bit.  
Ray leans in and kisses Joel on the cheek.  
“Are you going home?” He asks.  
“I’m going to the hospital for a bit.” Joel responds, “Want to come with me?”  
“Is he awake?” Ray asks.  
Joel nods and replies, “The blood work that was done on him is working. he's awake now.”  
Ray nudges Joel and says, “See, progress.”  
“You’re right, they say that he needs more time and therapy before he can completely recover and go home. I’m just - nevermind.” Joel explains picking up his knapsack.  
“What’s wrong?” Ray asks.  
“He might turn eighteen before he comes home.” Joel replies, looking down.  
“When’s his birthday?” The younger continues.  
Joel stays quiet for a minute, thinking about when Geoff’s birthday is.  
“June nineteenth.” Joel finally answers.  
“He’ll be home before then, it’s only February.” Ray assures.  
Joel nods and agrees by saying, “Burnie just turned eighteen and Gus is going to be eighteen at the end of this month and they’re both still living there so I guess Geoff will come back too.”  
Ray smiles at Joel before lacing his fingers with Joel’s own. Joel gives Ray a small smile and they both leave the school and make their way to the bus stop. When they leave most of the students have already left and it’s mostly elementary school kids that are at the bus stop, dressed in navy blue and white. When they get closer Joel notices that he towers over them.  
Seeing them in uniform makes Joel chuckle, he got out of elementary school and into highschool before they implemented a uniform citywide.  
Ray notices and asks “What’s so funny?”  
“Nothing, just glad I didn’t have to wear that stupid uniform.” Joel responds, walking through the masses of student to the bus sign then leaning against it.  
Ray stands near by and defends, “I had to wear it.”  
“I bet you looked really nice in it.” Joel winks.  
Ray notices a few of the students giving them odd looks but ignores them and asks out loud, “I think I still have mine?”  
“I dare you to put it on.” Joel comments.  
“Hey, I grew during the summer; it won’t fit.”  
The bus stop in front of the stop and the students pile around Joel and Ray, trying to get on the bus first. The two teens get onto the bus and Joel pays for both of them before Joel dras ray to the back of the bus and sits down in the double seats, their fingers link together once more and the bus drives off.  
During the bus ride, clouds start to cover up the sky and rain starts to pour, streaking clean the dirty windows of the bus.  
Ray notices and lets go of Joel’s hand in order to take off his backpack. From the backpack Ray grabs a small umbrella that’s all black with red around the edges. He closes his bag and leave it on his lap as he hands Joel the umbrella.  
Joel looks to it then looks at Ray and asks “What are you doing?”  
“Giving this for you to use, it’s only big enough for one of us.” Ray responds.  
“You use it.” Joel says, giving the umbrella back.  
Ray shakes his head and doesn’t accept the umbrella back and starts “Joel-” but is interrupted by someone yelling.  
“Hey, Fags!”  
Joel’s fist clench around the umbrella in hand and he looks over.  
A man a few rows ahead, with more hair on his chin than on his head, reeks of alcohol and cigarettes, which Joel assumes that the smell would be stronger the closer you get to him.  
“Yeah, you too!” He shouts.  
The two teens remain silent and he goes on to shout, “What? Got nothing to say? Too choked up from all the cock you’ve been sucking!”  
The other patrons look horrified at the man’s words but say nothing to defend Joel and Ray or say anything to the man.  
Joel feels his jaw clench.  
The bus stops and Joel goes over to the man, eyeing him.  
The man looks up and sneers, “Don’t breathe on me you AIDs infested monkey.”  
“How about you don’t make comments about my boyfriend?” Joel growls, feeling anger surge up inside of him.  
“Oh, boo hoo! You fags get everything you want and the one time you're challenged you cry a goddamn river. Bunch of fucking pansies!” He spits out.  
Joel clenches his fists even more, thinking of how to make this man shut up. Wanting the punch him black and blue but the risk of being thrown in jail isn’t worth it.  
He stands there until the bus driver says calmly “Sir, please get off the bus.”  
The man gets up, shaking as he stands.  
Joel steps back not wanting to be in the man’s away incase he tries to hurt the teen.  
“Why the fuck should I?” The man growls and adds, “Let these fairies walk, or are you afraid they’ll melt in the rain because they're made of fairy dust?”  
“Sir, I am giving you one last chance to leave or I will call the police.” The bus driver warns, keeping her tone calm and stopping the man’s rant.  
The man falls silent and then shouts, “Fine then!” before staggering out of the bus’s side door.  
Joel goes back to his seat beside Ray, still fuming. Ray leans over and kisses Joel’s clenched jaw, hoping for the older teen to relax.  
Joel looks down at Ray and kisses him, feeling calmer as a result, Ray’s kisses working as always.  
They part when the automated voice says the stop in which they have to get off, Joel leans over and pulls the cord signalling that they want to bus to stop.  
Ray makes sure they have everything before exiting the bus. Once outside in the pouring rain which Ray thinks feels nice against his skinny bare arms, Joel opens the umbrella and holds it over Ray, shielding him from the rain.  
Ray looks up at them umbrella then to Joel and says “I meant for you to put it over yourself.”  
“I’m fine, you’re just wearing the white shirt. I have my hoodie, also I don’t mind the rain.” Joel counters, holding the umbrella firmly over Ray, not minding the cold rain drops pounding on his head and shoulders and covering every inch of him.  
“Fine, let’s just get inside quickly, okay?” Ray asks.  
Joel nods and they rush through the parking lot, avoiding cars and eventually getting inside the heavily air conditioned building.  
Joel leads Ray to the children’s wing going through another hallway different than the one he went through yesterday, Matt told him that Geoff changed rooms and with the help of the numbered rooms and sign Joel and Ray find their way to Geoff’s room.  
Outside Geoff’s room, Joel takes a deep breath. before entering. The room is dark, the blinds drawn and the lights off. Joel notices that the other two beds in the room are empty, imprints of bodies still on the beds but the bodies no there.  
Joel sees Geoff, playing on a red GameBoy Advance SP, the one Joel sometimes notice Matt or Kathleen playing.  
Geoff lounges on the bed, the sheets covered up to his chest, his right arm is above the sheet and hooked up to a bunch of different machines but he doesn’t seem to mind the needles and tubes in his arm.  
Joel smiles a bit, glad to see his friend making a speedy recovery and any anxiety he had about his friend’s well being are nothing more than dust in the wind.  
“A GameBoy?” Joel asks, walking closer to Geoff’s bedside.  
The screen being the only light in the room, showing the paleness still in Geoff’s face and scruff starting to form around his jaw.  
“It’s all Sarge gave me, and Tex gave me like three games.”Geoff responds, looking up at Joel.  
Joel takes a seat on the chair near Geoff’s bed, still smiling.  
Ray creeps behind Joel, nervous about where he is; Ray never liked hospitals and he doesn’t know what to say or do.  
“Hey, Joel.” Geoff smiles at Joel.  
His complexion is still sick and pale but it looks a lot better than it did yesterday and the first day he was here.  
“Hey.” Joel replies.  
“Who’s this? New kid in the home? Oh God, Am I getting replaced by that kid?” Geoff questions, looking from Joel to Ray then back to Joel frantically.  
“Uh.. Uh.” Ray starts, not knowing how to respond.  
Joel interrupts explaining “He isn’t in the home, remember that boy I saved?”  
“Yeah, the Little Fish, I mean, Ray.”Geoff replies.  
Ray looks at Joel because of the nickname.  
Joel doesn’t notice and jerks his to Ray’s direction and says “That’s him.”  
Geoff get another look and says “He looks different than I imagined.”  
“Well-” Ray starts, in a small yet firm voice “I’m shockingly caucasian.”  
Geoff starts to laugh, Joel soon following.  
“I like this kid, good choice.” Geoff grins.  
Joel smiles back before asking, “Speaking of good relationship choices, have you seen her?”  
“Griffon, yeah she’s visiting tonight after her woodwork class.” Geoff replies.  
Ray steps forward and asks in confusion, “Griffon? Woodwork class?”  
Geoff looks to Joel and asks, “You didn’t tell him?”  
“Oh yeah because I talk about my best friend’s girlfriend to my new boyfriend all the time, Geoff.”Joel replies sarcastically.  
Geoff chuckles and says “She’s not my girlfriend yet, but she does like me.”  
“So are you two together?” Joel asks.  
“Kind of.” Geoff shrugs, then adding, “She says we’ll go on a date when I get out and she did hug me and kiss me on the cheek.”  
Ray toning out Joel and Geoff’s conversation notices in a darkened corner by Geoff’s bed a soft looking lump.  
“Umm, Geoff? What’s that, in the corner?” Ray asks, pointing to the lump.  
The two teens break their conversation as Joel looks over and asks, “What the fuck is that?”  
“Oh yeah.” Geoff replies, not looking too worried.  
The two teens break their conversation as Joel looks over and asks, “What the fuck is that?” “Oh yeah.” Geoff replies, not looking too worried. Looking concerned Joel asks “Is there a mouse in this room?” “Looks more like a bear.” Ray suggests, feeling more comfortable in the room. Joel looks to Ray and asks, “Really?” before turning back to the lump. Without saying another word Geoff leans over and pulls a long piece of string connected to the light above his bed, lighting up his part of the room. “It’s a plush snake, Burnie got it for me.” He explains then mutters “Fuck snakes.” “Can I see it?” Ray asks, seeing the plush snake clearly. Geoff looks to Joel and asks, “Will you give it to him?” Joel narrows his eyes at Geoff, knowing fully well that Geoff knows that they share a similar fear. Joel looks at Ray then back to Geoff before slowly and carefully leaning over to grab the snake. With shaky hands he grabs it from the tiled floor and with a tight hand around the dark green and black material of the snakes neck he slowly moves back up. He throws it at Geoff and he yells, “Fuck!” before throwing it at Ray. Ray catches it and looks at the two teens, Joel laughing and Geoff’s face which holds horror. Geoff’s face reminds Joel when the house took a trip to the zoo the summer before they started high school. When they got to the snake exhibit Burnie and Gus literally dragged Geoff into the building. Geoff lasted fifteen seconds at most before he came running out, screaming and on the brink of crying. About twenty minutes later the two boys came out and Geoff punched Burnie in the nose and Gus in the jaw, Matt then had to spend the next half an hour for them not to start a brawl in the middle of the zoo. Ray looks down at the snake toy in his arms, it’s about the length of his forearm when straightened out, it’s dark green with black diamonds on its back with a cream coloured underside, it’s tongue pink felt and sticking out of its non-existent mouth. “I think it’s cute.” Ray comments looking at it. “It’s yours, Little Fish.” Geoff says, smiling at the younger teen. Ray looks to Geoff, “Thank you.” “Are you scared of any animals?” Geoff asks, giving Ray a questionable look. Ray shakes his head and says “But I was attacked by a pelican as a kid.” “Wait, what?” Geoff asks, trying to hold back a laugh. Joel looks to Geoff and gives him a look as if to say: ‘Don’t laugh, asshole.’ “Yeah. My family and I went to Florida when I was like four and I was sitting on a bench and a pelican went up to me and hit me on the head and I fell off the bench. I don’t remember this happening or anything prior to that.” “Are you okay now?” Geoff asks, arching an eyebrow. Ray stuffs his hands in his pockets, the snake under his arm and shrugs with the reply, “I guess.” They continue to talk, Geoff asking where Ray got attacked and Ray pointing to the back left side of his head. Geoff asking what grade Ray is and gives Joel a suggestive wink when Ray replies that he’s in the ninth grade. Geoff seemed interested in Ray, not in the way that Joel is but, in the way a brother would be in their sibling’s boyfriend, except less intimidating. That’s the thing about Geoff, he isn’t scary unless he wants to be or he’s being the big brother like he was when Kara’s boyfriend was treating her badly. He didn’t have to be protective of Joel, so he was interested in Ray; wanting to hear more about his video game habit or his grandma and how she baked Joel a pie (Where Geoff made a pie joke, similar to what Burnie and Gus said) Joel sat there glad that Ray is getting along with most of his makeshift family that he’s built over the years. They stay until a blonde girl comes in who Joel instantly recognizes. She walks in with a black fabric bag slung over her shoulder, the bag looking rather empty. “Griffon!” Geoff smiles, trying not to move too much so the needles come out of his arm. She smiles and waves, walking to Geoff’s bed and sitting on the window ledge, trying not to knock over plants that have been brought to the teen. “Well, I think this is time for proper introductions; Griffon, my brother, Joel, and his boyfriend Ray. Joel, Ray, this is Griffon.” Geoff introduces. “You’re the guy from a few nights ago that gave me Geoff’s number.” She notices. Joel nods and says, “I guess I had something to do with this then.” Geoff nods and says, “I’ll thank you some day.” Then chuckles. “I guess I’ll say thank you now; thank you for giving me his number.” Griffon smiles. “No problem.” Joel replies. Griffon opens the bag in her hand and takes out a small carving, out of wood and hands it to Geoff. “Holy fuck, you made this?” Ray looks at in awe. He’s seen larger work like that around the school and art festivals he’s been dragged too but, nothing that good at such a small size. “Made it in the class, they wanted something small. I thought why not give you something that you can keep with you while you’re here. Good thing is, it’ll last longer than all these flowers.” She replies, giving him a smile. “You’re right.” Geoff smiles back. “I think we should get going, let you two do your thing.” Joel explains,getting up from his chair. Geoff nods, understanding that it’ll be a bit awkward. Joel says goodbye to the pair along with Ray and the couple leave the hospital. Outside the room Joel says in a hush voice, “I better get a thanks” before leaving the hospital with Ray. Days turn into a full week and Joel’s life runs on two schedules by the end of it, both involving him being with Ray. Both schedules start off the same, get up and go to school, but after school either him and Ray would go to the hospital or go to Joel’s house and get some homework. At the end of the week, it started off good, Joel performed his play with Jack and Ryan and went off with a bang. After that class Ray was at Joel’s locker as always and had his sketchbook in hand. Joel smiles at Ray and Ray opens his notebook, flipping through life drawings and drawing of various video game characters until he reaches near the middle of the spiral bound book and carefully rips out one of the pages. When he hands it to Joel and he sees that on the sheet of paper is a drawing of Master Chief holding a Pikachu by its tail, looking confused at the Pikachu. “Wow that’s really good.” Joel chuckles, looking at the paper still. Ray shrugs and says, “It’s not the best.” Still looking at the paper Joel punches Ray’s arm and says, “Shut up, it’s good.” That only made Ray smile and say, “Well, thank you.” Joel put the drawing in his locker, making a mental note to bring it home at the end of the day. The rest of the day goes by in a haze, English class going by with little attention paid to it and eventually Joel finds himself walking home with Ray and then finding himself kissing him on the warm bed. Feeling as calm as possible when he kisses Ray, all the stress in the world gone, and any type of anger or pain is gone as well. The feeling of Ray underneath him in a mess of lips and tongue everything feels good. When Ray parts lips from Joel, he looks at him, fixing the glasses on his face and saying “Thanks.” He mumbled, smiling at Joel. “For what?” Joel asks. “What do you think?” Ray asks, arching an eyebrow, a smile still on his face. Before Joel can reply he hears Burnie say, “Joel, I need your help.” Which causes Joel to instantly get off Ray and finds himself standing up, all three of the teens red in the face. “I didn’t know this was grade nine homework, I would’ve gotten more action that year.” Burnie says sarcastically. This deflated Joel’s calm and happy mood. “What do you want, Burns?” Joel asks, letting out a sigh. “Sarge asked me to do something and I’m doing it now and I need your help.” Burnie replies. Ray sits up, covering up any love bite on his shoulder with Joel’s soft blanket. Joel looks at Ray before leaving the room with Burnie. Outside the room and down the hall a bit, Joel sees Gus leaning against the green wall. “What do you guys want?” Joel asks, crossing his arms. Gus gets off the wall and mimics what Joel is doing. “Stop hurting that Little Fish.” Burnie simply say. “What the fuck are you talking about?” Joel asks, eyeing Burnie. Burnie stuffs his hands in his pockets and starts to explain “Joel, are you using Ray to get out all this anger? If you are don’t fool this kid into thinking that someone loves him. Joel, If you don’t love him, don’t keep him in the dark. Break up with him if you’re using him.” Joel feels his chest clench, not knowing what to say. Confusion fills his mind and he feels like his heart is going to fall out of his chest. “What?” Joel asks, putting a hand on his shoulder, his breathing feeling restricted. Gus steps forward and says “Don’t play games you know that you’ll never win and end up hurting everyone around you.” Joel steps back, feeling as if his legs are a mix of jelly and lead. “Have anything to say?” Burnie asks. Joel remains quiet and the the two teens walk past him and go downstairs to the basement. Joel sits down, his head pounding to the rhythm of his heart which is at a feverish pace, his restricted breathing and his tightly clenched chest isn’t helping him either. "C'mon, nothing? Are we right or are we wrong?" Gus asks, looking narrowly at Joel, who is in the midst of having a panic attack. Joel's head swirls with thoughts and there is no way that he can take a moment and process it. He has to make his choice right now and every second that he remain quiet makes him only look more and more guilty when in reality he doesn't know what to say and all the thoughts he has cannot get transferred into full entrances, only heavy breathing. Joel attempts to speak but only comes out as a sob, part of him knows that he's using Ray as a way to comfort himself but the other half loves Ray and wants to be with him, the two sides fighting inside of his head. "You can't have your cake and eat it, if you're hurting him please stop because you're only going to end up hurting everyone else as well. I know right now is stressful for you and you feel like you're on the brink of collapse but, you can;t drag others with you." Burnie explains, his voice once hard as rock cooling down. Still even with Burnie's softer tone, Joel still feels lost and confused and doesn't know what to say. Breaking all silence from his mind he hears a small voice sounding like Ray's saying "Joel." and the voice he says it in breaks Joel's heart more than it has ever been broken before. Joel looks over, feeling his eyes swell up with tears that start to wet his cheeks. Nothing will stop the pain in the chest both in Joel's chest but, also in Ray's. “Joel, no. No, no, no, no. Why?” Ray whispers, feeling the emotions of heartbreak and sadness overcome him, causing tears to fall. “I-” He tries to say, he tries to defend himself but he know he can’t. He knows that Burnie and Gus are right but, they’re also not and Joel doesn’t know how to say that because Gus is right, he is in a losing battle. Over the past week he’s felt happy, something only reserved for his family. He let his emotions expand past those boundaries and in the end the look on Ray's face destroys any type of alternate reality Joel was in for the last week. Now everything has rushed Joel back to reality with the simple expression that tells all the pain that Joel is feeling right now, the pain masked onto Ray's face. Ray shakes his head and goes back into the room, shoving all the items into his bag along with the drawing he gave Joel earlier that day and exits the room, his pace fast as he passes Joel who is still on the hardwood floor. ‘Ray.” Joel manages to get out, his face holding confusion and pain. “You know something Joel, I can take a beating. I can take a few bruises, but I can’t take knowing that you’re using me, like I’m a fucking bottle of beer or a heroin needle. I’m not a drug, Joel. maybe once you realize that you and I can work something out but, I’m not going to be used. Not like my grandma or my mom. Fuck! Maybe you shouldn’t have saved me that day!” He shouts at the end before opening the front door, tears streaming down his cheeks. He takes one last look at Joel before leaving the house and shutting the door behind him loudly. Joel lies down on the floor, not caring around the dust that circles him. He screams “Fuck!” All Gus and Burnie can do is look at the scene that just unfolded, guilt filling them and the realization that something that was once peaceful in happy lays in ruins. Outside the house, Ray stands there, thinking if he should walk back in and apologize for being so loud but, he realizes that he hasn't hurt anyone, he’s the one who is heartbroken, that’s what makes him walk down the steps of the house and on his way home, hoping that he is wrong and Joel does care for him; he hopes he’s wrong. Ray practically runs home, trying to get as far away from the happy memories they only shared a few hours prior. His sneaker clad feet smack against the pavement as he runs down the street, wiping his eyes when he can’t see past the tears. He gets home quickly and fumbles with his keys and gets the door open. He doesn’t take off his shoes and walks into his room, opening the door and closing it behind him. The grey walls of his room feel darker and his bed feels like rock. He curls up into a ball, not caring that his dirty sneakers will ruin the white sheets. His heart has sank and has crushed into a million pieces. He hears his grandma ask “¿Qué está mal.” “Nada, estoy bien.” He replies, covering his head with his hands. He hears his grandma say, “Sabes que puedes hablar conmigo.” then walking away from his shut door. He lets out a sob into his blanket; it;s hard enough getting someone to like you and date you, it’s even harder knowing someone you’re with is using you for their own reasons. The vibrations of his phone snap him out of his angry and sad crying. He lifts his head and wipes his face with the blanket and he takes his phone out, expecting Joel’s name on the display screen but instead finds Gavin’s name. He sits up, slumping against the headboard of his bed and answers it. “Hello.” He says, trying not to sound like he has been crying. Instead of a ‘hello’ Gavin says “Ray, I made a big mistake.”


	5. A Plan and A Party

“Gavin?” Ray asks “What’s wrong?”  
“I kissed Michael, and I shouldn’t have done that, and I fucked up, and I ruined our friendship, I ruined the trio by kissing him, I couldn’t help it, Ray, we were drinking and- and- and- fuck.” He rambles.  
“Gavin, Gavin, Gavin!” Ray shouts, trying to knock some sense into the other teen.  
Gavin goes silent and Ray says in a calmer tone “Gavin, please tell me in a slower tone. Please.”  
Ray hears Gavin let out a sigh then start to explain “Michael and I were in the basement of my house, we were alone because you know that my parents are always gone. Michael brought some beer and we were drinking. He started to say how much he wanted to marry Lindsay one day, and I said if that doesn’t work, that he can always be with me, and then I kissed him. The kiss only lasted a few seconds, he pushed me away and got up then started to yell at me.” Gavin pauses, sniffling a bit before continuing “He said that he should leave and to never talk to him again, I think I ruined our friendship, Ray.”  
Ray lets out a sigh and says “Gavin, I’ll talk to Michael in the morning, right now. Right now- fuck!”  
“Ray, I’m sorry. Shit, is it a bad time to call?” Gavin asks, worry in his voice.  
“No, I’m just a bit messed up too.” Ray replies.  
“Oh.. What happened?”   
Ray sighs and replies, “Can I call you later about it, I need to sort it out first.”  
“Okay, Ray. I’ll talk to you soon then, bye.” Gavin says.  
“Bye.” Ray responds before hanging up.  
He sits up, taking off his shoes. He takes off his glasses and wipes his eyes and the glass of his glasses with his sleeve before putting them back on his face.  
He lies back down, getting under the covers. He wants to block out the setting sun, he wants to just go to sleep and never wake up, he feels used like a tissue and he doesn’t know how to fix what had just happened.   
He wanted to apologize for what he said to Joel but, in a way it was the truth; Ray was saved and like every story the hero always get the girl or guy, Ray wanted that to happen but he didn’t know that was just gettin used.  
He closes his eyes and hopes that once he falls asleep he doesn’t get up the next morning.  
\-----  
The next day, Ray does everything he can to steer away from Joel. Going down different hallways than usual even though it takes him longer to get to class. He saw Joel once and moved faster down the hall so the older teen wouldn’t see him. Joel spent all morning trying to find Ray, even waiting outside of Ray’s art class after third period but, no sight of the teen.   
The whole day felt empty and he was pretty sure that Ray was avoiding him and to be honest if Joel saw Ray he would end up doing something rash and end up back in the principal's office. In drama class, he accidentally came off too harsh with Jack while he was talking about his girlfriend coming to America, he quickly apologized but, for the rest of class Jack didn’t talk about her and that made Joel feel even worse.  
Joel called Matt during lunch and his caretaker let him go home because “You’re not going to learn anything if you’re going to mope, but you’re going all day tomorrow.”  
Ray called his grandma and she let him go home as well, understanding that the teen is in a lot of pain.  
While walking home, Joel stops at the crosswalk and sees Ray beside him, looking straight as head, headphones in his ears, not paying attention to the other teen beside him. Joel can feel his hand brush up against Ray’s the urge to grab it and beg for forgiveness settling in.  
Ray looks to Joel then looks both ways and starts to run across the street.  
“Ray!” Joel shouts but Ray ignores him.  
Ray continues to run and narrowly misses a blue SUV that is driving down the road. The driver honks his horn but Ray keeps running till he gets to the bus stop.  
Ray’s heart is pounding in his ears, louder than the music pouring into them from the headphones.  
He can see the driver yelling at him and Joel’s shocked expression on the other side of the street but Ray keeps walking at a fast pace, hoping the SUV doesn’t follow him home.  
Once he’s out of sight, Joel pushes the button for him to cross. He soon crosses and, his heartbreaking even more as worry fills him up.   
He almost lost Ray, and for what? So the younger teen can get away from him. All Joel hopes is that Ray doesn’t make anymore rash decisions, doing things that could get him killed.  
He was wrong, very wrong. Two days later with Ray still avoiding him at every single cost. While Joel was walking to his locker before class he sees Ray by someone else’s locker, awfully close. The teen Ray was with looked familiar, he saw him while waiting outside Ray’s art class. The name of him escapes Joel, he remembers hearing it when the art teacher calling him back him, it started with a J.  
The other teen, completely out of uniform, a white t-shirt and black skinny jeans with green headphones around his neck and sunglasses tucked over the front of his shirt.  
His arms loose around Ray’s waist and in deep conversation. If there weren’t so many people in the hallway that kid would have a broken jaw.   
Joel walks the opposite direction, not wanting to see anymore of the two teens.  
Ray looks in the direction Joel went and leans in to JJ and asks quietly, “Do you think he saw?”  
JJ nods and responds “Yeah, what’s the next step?”  
“I’ll meet you after first, outside our science class.” Ray replies.  
“Will he be there?”   
“He will.” Ray assures.  
“You know who right?” JJ asks, looking at Ray.  
Ray puts a hand on JJ’s shoulder and replies “Blaine. I know what he looks like. He’s your damn lock screen.”  
“Shut up, like you're any better with Joel?” JJ asks.  
Ray takes his hand away from the other teen’s shoulder and points out “We have an agreement, we need to act as in love as possible, it’ll work I promise.”   
JJ lets go of Ray and they start to go to their science class. JJ was the polar opposite of Ray, he was a year ahead of Ray but failed since the previous year and that’s how they met, because their lab partners. The day after Ray left early, JJ noticed something was up. Usually Ray was more engaged in the class than JJ ever will be but that day Ray wasn’t focused, not taking notes and basically not paying attention to anything around him.  
JJ asked “Are you alright?”  
Ray didn’t respond and JJ further asked, “Girl trouble?”  
The other teen just shrugged.  
“Guy trouble? If it’s that, I get where you’re coming from.” JJ asked in a lowered voice just in case he’s right, and Ray doesn’t want to openly come out in front of the whole class.  
Ray looked at him and softly nodded.  
“I guess you and I are on the same page then.”  
Ray shrugged and said, “I don’t know. He kind of messed up the relationship.”  
“Same here, he won’t admit that him and I are together because he’s a dick sometimes.” JJ explained in a hushed voice.  
“What’s his name?” Ray asked.  
“Blaine.” JJ takes out his phone and turn it on showing a picture of him with a striped shirt and cigarette hanging out of his mouth and another guy, blonde, with scruff on his chin, muscle with a football jersey on, they both look extremely happy.  
“That’s him?” Ray asked.  
“Mr. Jones, please put your phone away or I will take it away, and Mr. Narvaez don’t let Mr. Jones distract you from this class.” The teacher instructed.  
Ray nodded and JJ just scowled at the teacher before putting his phone away.  
He leaned over to Ray and said “That’s Blaine, he’s a big shot on the football team. I have a plan, meet me behind the school at lunch.”  
“Isn’t that where the Pit is?” Ray asked, looking concerned.  
JJ smirks and said, “Don’t worry, I won’t get you to smoke. You look to innocent for that.”  
“I don’t even drink.” Ray mumbled, feeling embarrassed for admitting that.  
“You’re more innocent than I thought. I’ll meet you there during lunch, we won’t go past the gates I promise.” JJ assured.  
By lunch Ray was standing by the gates to the Pit, waiting for JJ. He didn’t make eye contact with anyone who went in or out, noticing some of the kids from his grade going in.  
Eventually he heard, “Ray!” which caused the teen to look up and see JJ walking across the parking lot, an unlit cigarette already in his mouth.  
“Is that you know-” Ray started by JJ said, “Illegal, I know, but that’s not the point right now. Want to hear my idea before you run for your life away from this place?”  
Ray nodded and JJ started to explain, “So, we both want to get back at these guys in hopes that they’ll get back with us. Now, I’m willing to take a few punches from your guy, only if you’re willing to take a few from mine, it’s unlikely that he will, he’s a gentle giant, but he can be a prick.”  
Ray nodded in agreement and JJ continued, “We’re going to act like we’re together, act like we’re walking home together, be close and cuddly, if this lasts more than two weeks we’ll have to amp it up to kissing” then wrapped his thumb and pointer finger around Ray’s chin and said, “I won’t mind if it comes to that.”  
Ray swallowed and JJ let go of him saying, “Don’t worry, I’m just messing with you. Now you’re job is to keep track of routes to classes, lockers and other things, okay? This will only work in the hallways and times before and after school.”  
Ray nodded again and JJ said “Good, now go get some lunch, I’ll meet you at your locker after school.”  
“Mine’s on the second floor.” Ray added before running across the parking lot and inside the building.  
JJ watched before lighting up his cigarette and smiling to himself, glad that finally he has a way to get Blaine.  
The first step to their plan was done, which was making Joel jealous, the second part was making Blaine jealous.  
JJ holds Ray’s hand outside the classroom, waiting for Blaine. Once JJ sees him walk through the corridors his arms are instantly around Ray’s waist and whispering “Show time.”  
As Blaine walks by he looks at JJ, JJ looking back with a smug expression on his face.  
“Hello, JJ.” Blaine says.  
“Hey, Blaine. Lost some more brain cells during practice?”   
Blaine gives him a look before asking, “I’m having a party on Saturday, do you want to come? You can bring your... boyfriend, too. He can bring some friends if he wants. A lot of the school is going to be there, I know how you enjoy parties.”  
“What’s it for? Team hasn’t won a game yet.” JJ says smugly.  
“We’ll win this Friday.” Blaine assures.  
JJ chuckles, letting go of Ray and asks, “A little cocky aren’t we?”  
“Are you going to come or are you going to make an anti-party with your Pit friends?” Blaine asks, his tone sounding a mix of cocky and annoyed.  
“We’ll come, right, Ray?” JJ asks, looking at the other teen.  
“Yeah.” Ray agrees.  
JJ turns back to Blaine and says “Ray has some friends at another school, think there will be room for them?”  
“You’ve been to my house, after so many study sessions we have. There will be room.” Blaine explains before grabbing JJ by the shirt, getting up close with him before muttering some things that Ray can’t hear.  
JJ says some things back that Ray also can’t make out besides “We’ll be there Blaine, don’t worry your precious football helmet wearing head.”  
Blaine lets go of him and looks to Ray and saying “See you Saturday -”  
“Ray, his name is Ray.” JJ steps in.  
“Alright, see you, Ray.” Blaine says, giving the other teen a smile before walking off to his next class.  
“Prick.” JJ grumbles, looking at the direction Blaine went in.  
“I thought my revenge plan was evil.” Ray says to himself but JJ hears him.  
He turns around to face Ray and says “I really like Blaine, I just wish he’d dump that girl of his. It’s not fair to her that he’s basically lying.”  
“It’s okay.” Ray says, trying to comfort JJ but not knowing how to.  
“I know it is, the bell is going to ring soon. Why don’t you get your A+ average ass to your next class.”  
“I know we’re faking going out but, don't stare at my ass.” Ray points out.  
“I didn't make the rules the rules of fake dating.” JJ says, shrugging.  
Ray rolls his eyes and JJ puts him in a hug and says, “Bye!” before letting the younger teen go and walking away.  
Ray looks at JJ as he walks away then runs to his next class.  
In third period Joel wasn’t feeling angry but betrayed, he assumed it was the same thing that Ray felt when he left Joel’s house.  
Ever since that day he’s been awfully bitter towards everyone in the house, even ones who had nothing to do with it like Kara, Sarge, and Tex. He has mostly kept quiet and not really told anyone about the break up but then again who would he have to tell. Burnie and Gus triggered the break up, Kara was in the house when it happened and eventually got him off the floor and to the couch where she made him something to eat, Tex and Sarge found out because nothing in the house can be kept a secret, and Jack and Ryan don’t know that Joel’s gay.  
Once he stepped into that class, Joel notices a girl with blonde hair and a grin sitting with Jack and Ryan.  
Joel walks over to them and looks suspiciously at them.  
“Hey, Joel.” Ryan says, giving Joel a small smile.  
”Hey guys, who’s this?” Joel asks.  
Jack says “Oh right, Joel, this is Barbara, she’s in our group now. She transferred here.”  
Joel looks to her and asks “From where?”  
“Canada.” She replies.  
Joel sits down and says “Well I’m glad you’re part of the group.” and giving her a smile.  
They all knew that they should be working on the next assignment but instead they were talking.  
“So, anything interesting about you guys?” She asks.  
Jack sits up and says with a smile on his face “My girlfriend is moving here from Australia.”  
Ryan chuckles and says “He talks about her everyday, you’ll get get used to it.”  
“Are you two seeing anyone?” She asks.  
Ryan shakes his head in a no and saying “I’ll find someone soon, hopefully.”  
“You’re in love with Edgar.” Jack chuckles.  
“Who’s Edgar?” Barbara asks.  
Ryan gives Jack a look before replying to Barbara “He’s a stuffed cow that I’ve had forever and I named a cow that my uncle owns Edgar too.”  
“Sometimes he puts fake Edgar into a hole.”  
Ryan’s face goes red and says, trying not to be too loud. “Jack!”  
Barbara chuckles and says, “Jack, don’t make him a mad cow.”  
Jack and Joel start to laugh, not only because of Ryan’s facial expression but also Barbara’s shitty pun.  
When their laughter dies down because of a scolding look from the teacher, barbara asks, “What about you, Joel?”  
“Really, really, really complicated at the moment.”  
Barbara leans over and pats him on the shoulder and says “It’s okay, everything will sort itself out eventually.”  
“I was expecting another pun.” Joel jokes, trying to get to a more lighter topic.  
She shrugs and replies “I have my limits.”  
“Have you guys heard of this party on Saturday?” Ryan asks, looking at the group.  
Everyone shakes their head in a no.  
“Oh, I got word of it on my way to second period. This guy Blaine is hosting it, he’s on the football team and anyone is able to come. His house is somewhere uptown, I think I might go. I don’t know, I’m not too good is social situations and what not.” Ryan explains.  
Joel thinks that he’s just going to stay home, he wasn’t like Burnie, Gus, or Geoff where they went to parties often. He was probably going to stay home and do nothing like he usually did.  
“How did you find this out?” Jack asks.  
“I already said.” Ryan responds.  
“Who said it.” Jack corrects.  
“Blaine himself, he was talking to this other kid with glasses and that one guy who got kicked out last year, JJ I think is his name.” Ryan replies.  
Joel snaps back attention and asks “What did the other guy look like?”  
“Dark hair, dark eyes, tanned and wearing thick glasses. He was getting pretty cozy with JJ.” Ryan explains.  
“So he's going to the party?” Joel asks.  
“I guess so. Why?” Ryan asks.  
Joel nods, and Barbara asks, “Why do you care? Are you stalking him?”  
“I’m not, I was going out with him and I don’t trust this JJ guy. I want to make sure he’s okay, we ended on bad terms and I think that he’s making a bad decisions by being with JJ. I’m not a stalker, I’m just concerned about someone I care about.” Joel replies.  
“Oh, well, I don’t know where the party is but, if I hear anything I’ll tell you.” Ryan smiles.  
“Thanks.” Joel smiles back.  
“Same here, I hear things sometimes. Any information I’ll let you know.” Jack pipes up.  
Joel arches an eyebrow and asks “Why are you guys helping me, you just thought I was a stalker?”  
Ryan shrugs and replies, “JJ is a bit of a bad boy, he got kicked out last year for two weeks, he rarely attends class and from what I saw of that other kid, they’re total opposites, if I knew him I’d be worried too.”   
Jack notices the teacher giving them another look as if for they to start working.  
“Um guys, I think we should start working.” Jack points out, looking back to the group.  
The others look over and see the teacher’s unrelenting stare before looking back to each other.  
“Yeah, we should start.” Ryan agrees.  
Before they get to work Jack asks “What’s on your binder?”  
Barbara looks at the binder on her lap and says “Right, it’s a picture of blurred limes.”  
Ryan puts his head in his hands and says, “Jesus fucking Christ.”  
Jack starts to laugh and Joel manages to break out in a smile while the wheels in his head turn about this Saturday.  
By the time Saturday comes, Joel has the address of the party thanks to Ryan’s careful ears.  
From what Ryan had told him that it was a casual party for the high school football team’s victory over A.H High School.   
The only thing Joel remembers from A.H High school was that their mascot was a giant joystick and the guy in charge of being the mascot got thrown into a dumpster a lot. Atleast C.B Academy has something respectable, their mascot was a giant rooster.  
Joel was getting ready in Geoff’s hospital room, glad that Burnie said that he’d drive the other teen home if he got too drunk and glad that Joel wasn’t moping around anymore.  
With a chance of getting back together with Ray and a long apology from both Burnie and Gus along with promises that they'll do anything for Joel, the teen carves out a deal with them,   
Joel wasn’t sad or angry or even heartbroken; the teen was on a mission now and he wasn’t stopping until it was fulfilled.   
“Come on, Joel. I have to use the washroom!” Geoff groans.  
“You let me change here, also I gave you Griffon’s number.” Joel counters.  
“Are you going to hold that over my head? If you have pants on you can come out, if the nurses come in, we play off like we’re together.” Geoff responds, still weary about using terms related to relationships around Joel.  
“Kind of, I did give you her number.” Joel points out.  
“Still over my head, Joel.” Geoff comments, trying to sound mad but coming off as laughing.  
Geoff was proud of Joel, when he came in after him and Ray split, Geoff thought that he’d have to send Joel to his counselor, but after a couple of days he turned right around. Geoff knows something is up, with him being somewhat happy and going to a party, he doesn’t know what it is but if it keeps Joel off of suicide watch, it works for Geoff.  
Joel chuckles to himself and says “That’s really gross, Geoff.” before walking out of the bathroom, his hair neat, contrasting from it’s usual bed head mess, wearing a black t-shirt that shows off what years of school yard fighting has done, and jeans that properly fit him and that weren’t a mix up with another boy in the house.  
“Wow Joel, I don’t think I ever saw you like this. Are these even your clothes?” Geoff asks.  
“Geoff, we go to a uniform school. Me out of uniform is something new to me too.” Joel replies, throwing his uniform onto the bed.  
“Why did I let you get ready here?” geoff questions, carefully crosses his arms so he doesn't pull the IV out.  
Geoff’s getting better, due to be back home by Monday which makes the rest of the family excited, and it makes Geoff glad because he won’t come home to friction within the family because Joel and the others patched things up, with the agreement that they will be Joel’s bitch, hence why Burnie is driving Joel to the party and back.  
“Because everyone will have an opinion on what I wear. I don’t go out much.”   
Geoff walks up to him and says “I don’t like what you’re wearing.”  
“Shut up.” Joel chuckles and goes to Geoff’s bed and folds his uniform and puts it on the window ledge and says “Like you look any better Mr. Hospital Gown.”  
“Hey, girls find this cute. Also I should say the same Mr. I Put My Hospital Gown on Backwards.” Geoff counters.  
When Joel was admitted into the hospital for some tests, they put him in a hospital gown and he put it on backwards and when Matt walked in to make sure everything was okay, he saw Joel’s cock loud and clear.  
“I was younger and they put me on some drugs, okay?” Joel says, trying not to smirk.  
He should really tell Ray that story, the thought of Ray makes his grin disappeared and replaced with a tight line.  
“Hey Joel, I know you’re still thinking about him, don’t. Think about all the guys and girls that will be there. Thinka bout me if you accidentally get drunk and get a boner.” Geoff comforts, trying to make the other teen smile.  
“Thanks.” Joel says putting his hands on Geoff’s shoulders and saying “I mean it, thank you.”  
Geoff pats Joel on the shoulder and says “We’re basically blood at this point so I have to do this kind of stuff.”  
Joel lets go of Geoff and sees Burnie come up to the door.  
“Hey.” Joel says.  
“Hey, Joel, Geoff. Are you ready to go?” Burnie asks, dangling to keys to the van.  
“Well, if it means possibly dying from carbon monoxide then yeah.” Joel replies.  
Geoff steps closer to the two teens and asks Burnie “Is the van okay? Is she okay? Is Puma okay?”  
“Yes she’s fine. Matt brought her in for a tune up the other day.” Burnie explains.  
“Good, I don’t want her scrap metal when I get home.” Geoff warns.  
“You’re coming home in two days or less, the car isn’t going anywhere.” Burnie reminds Geoff.  
Geoff points out “You never know.”  
Burnie rolls his eyes and looks to Joel and asks “Want to get going?”  
“Yeah, the party is going to start soon.”  
“Are you sure this is a good idea, you know, stalking your ex?” Geoff points out.  
“I’m not stalking, I’m merely making sure that he’s okay. The guy he’s with is trouble. Also, didn’t you do the same thing?” Joel questions.  
Geoff narrows his eyes and replies, “We don’t talk about that.”  
Burnie and Joel soon leave the hospital saying goodbye to Geoff.   
They get into the van and Joel says, “Never been in the front before.”  
Burnie chuckles and asks, “Not all its cracked up to be is it?”  
He starts to drive away from the hospital to the richer part of the city where Blaine lives.  
“So you got invited to this fancy ass house?” Burnie asks.  
Joel shrugs and replies “Well, it’s one of those house parties that everyone goes to.”  
“Oh, one of those. Be careful because there will be major drunks there and they’ll try to fight you. Just keep your temper down, I did something stupid like that once, remember that time I was in the police station for like eight hours. Also, don’t get too drunk.” Burnie explains, looking at the road.  
Joel looking out the passenger window at the street light filled streets and assures Burnie, “Don’t worry, I’m not going to drink at all.”  
“You say that all the time.” Burnie chuckles.  
Joel looks to Burnie and asks “Really? When was the last time I said that?”  
Burnie soon stops at a red light and looks to Burnie, giving him a knowing look.  
“I’m serious.” Joel says.  
Burnie looks back to the road and starts to retell, “Last Christmas, we were hanging out and we gave you a few too many beers even though you said you weren’t going to drink.”  
“Well, you kept feeding me those drinks. You kept swapping drinks on me.” Joel defends.  
“Don’t let that happen again then.” Burnie counters, punching Joel in the arm.  
Joel lets out a groan and holds his arm before replying, “I’ll make sure.” Then mutters, “Dipshit.”  
“I heard that.” Burnie comments before punching Joel in the arm again.  
Joel mutters out, “Fuck” and his face becomes covered in pain again.  
Burnie chuckles and continues to drive till they get to the richest part of town, turning on to Blaine's street.  
“Twenty-four- nevermind, it’s kind of obvious.” Burnie says, noticing the light up house up the road.  
The house is massive with lights everywhere, from the large trees in the front that are covered in christmas lights, all the lights in the large house on and more christmas lights dangling along the top floor balcony, and the lights leading up the walkway are on.  
“Wow.” Burnie and Joel say in unison, looking at the illuminated house.  
Burnie parks on the other side of the street and looks at Joel then saying, “Good luck.  
He puts his hand on Joel’s shoulder.  
“Thanks, bitch.” Joel replies giving a quick nod.  
“When this all clears up and you get that Little Fish back, I'm going to beat you up for saying that.” Burnie explains, still holding onto Joel’s shoulder.  
“I could still be mopey and pissed.” Joel counters.  
“I can live with that, I’m sorry I did it. Gus and I were being asses. It’s just, the kid was so young and he probably held you to the standard of a God and I didn’t want you yanking his chain. I know what that feels like and you know how Gus gets when he feels like people are being fucked around with, remember Super Gus? This is why me, Gus, and hell even the others want you to clear your name with this Little Fish. We realize that you are looking after him and you both deserve to be really fucking happy and just ignore our bitter, single comments. We never meant to hurt you or Ray. I’m sorry.” Burnie explains, looking at Joel.  
Joel nods and replies, “It’s fine, Burnie. I get it, I wish you never did it but, it happened now I have to clear things up with Ray because I do care about him, sure being near him calmed my anger and worries but I did care about him greatly, and I still do. I hope he wants to get back with me, you know. For fuck sake, Geoff loves him like a little brother, after he realized that Ray wasn’t replacing him in the home. I just don't want him to make a shitty decision and be with this guy.”  
Burnie let’s go of the teen and says with a smile on his face, “With that charm that other guy will have no chance in hell.”  
“Thanks, Burns. I’ll call you when the party is winding down or I just want to go home.” Joel says before exiting the rusting van.  
When Joel walks around the van and is crossing the street Burnie calls, “Bye, Sweetie!”   
Joel gives him the finger once he crosses the street and on the other side of the sidewalk. As he walks up the walkway he can hear the van driving away, sounding as if it was going to fall apart any second.  
As Joel gets closer to the house and can see more lights in the backyard, it’s February and it’s a bit chilly but it makes sense why the backyard would be open for the party. It’s still warm compared to other parts of the country.  
He makes it onto the large, white painted porch, the porch painted the same colour as the rest of the house.   
He knocks onto the white and glass door and someone from the far side of the porches calls to Joel, “It’s open, just go in.”  
Joel looks over and sees a young couple, looking at Joel, both with friendly expressions on their faces.  
The guy has brown hair that trails to the scruff on his face, wearing a red t-shirt and brown cargo pants. The girl wrapped up in his arms has dark hair and dark eyes, a smile on her face that indicates to Joel that she was the one who gave him the advice.  
“Thanks.” Joel replies, giving a slight nod.  
“I’m Miles, and this is Arryn.” Miles explains, Arryn waving slightly to Joel.  
Wanting to get inside, Joel replies, “I’m Joel, I guess I’ll see you in the party.” then waving to them before going inside.  
Never being to a high school party before, Joel doesn’t know what to expect but what he’s been told from the others, what he sees is different. The house doesn’t seem filled to the brim with people, music is coming from what Joel assumes the living room. Checking the time on his phone Joel realizes that he is too early for the party.  
The main room itself is beautiful, with high ceilings, polished wood floors and white painted walls. The walls have screws in them, showing that photographs or painting were on the walls but were taken down for the party in fear of them becoming damaged. A long staircase descends upstairs, looking elegant due to the lighting overhead, the same is to be said about a similar staircase that leads to the basement.  
Joel walks farther into the house, following the sound of the pop music and finds himself in what he assumes is the living room. He finds people already drinking and dancing.  
The room itself follows the recurring pattern for white walls and polished wooden floors.  
The furniture in the room has been pushed aside to make room for the party but people still lounge on them, some getting frisky on the couches.  
Joel walks out of the room and to the large kitchen next door. This to Joel seems like the only room that breaks the pattern for white walls and polished floors. The floors are tiled and the walls covered in wallpaper with fruits on it, this looked more like this house than any of the other rooms he has seen since he got here. He sits down at the old kitchen table and lets out a sigh.  
Tonight was going to be a long night  
Ray was still at home by the time Joel got to the house.   
Ray was supposed to meet JJ at the beginning of his street in ten minutes. His grandma doesn’t know that he’s going with JJ because that would only cause her to worry more than she was already is because of JJ’s ‘bad boy’ attitude.   
She’s still extremely bitter about Joel and what he did to her grandson. When Ray finally told her what happened and why Joel wasn’t visiting anymore, she wanted to go over to Joel’s house and beat up Joel for what he did to Ray. The teen managed to convince her otherwise and she didn’t go to Joel’s house and beat him with her massive wooden rolling pin.  
Tonight was part four of the plan or the recently added part of the plan. Part three was completely halfway through the week where JJ and Ray went on a ‘date’, they saw a super long documentary and they were the only people in the theater throughout the whole film.  
Ray later invited Gavin and Michael to the party tonight, but only Gavin accepted and Ray made the mistake by saying that Gavin was going to the party to Michael. There was obvious tension between Gavin and Michael and Ray was caught in the middle with no way of defusing it.  
The redhead quickly shot down the question and butchering with the response of “No, I’m not going anywhere near that asshole.” The thing about Michael was, he didn't try to cover up anything with he words, he used every single colorful word he could think of and directed it towards anyone he was talking to, he didn’t act nice because nice didn’t get him anywhere. He was nice though, but only was only one person that could get away with pushing Michael’s buttons and not have him blow up, that was Lindsay. Ray knows they're going to get married one day, heck if they announced that they were getting married the next morning Ray would totally believe it without a doubt. Ray liked hanging around Lindsay along with the others, he even considered making their trio and quartet.  
Tonight he didn’t want to think about that, he wanted to get JJ and Blaine together with the power of jealousy and hopefully part five will take place the following Monday, where Ray finally gets Joel to feel the same amount of pain that Ray felt but, in a different form but then again, all pain is the same.  
When Ray gets ready in a Pac-Man t-shirt and brown shorts, he goes downstairs to see his grandma downstairs, her greying hair in curlers as she has her feet propped up on the automan that Ray was forced to sit on a lot as a kid to make room on the couch for the adults. The floral pattern of it brings back nostalgic memories of his childhood, and also of his mom.   
His grandma sees him and gets up from her spot and walks over to him to start warning him about the dangers of underage drinking, telling him horror stories of what happened to her friends. (Ray assumes at least one of these instances happened to her because she is a recovered alcoholic.)   
He promises her that he isn’t going to drink at all and that if he can’t get home tonight he’ll stay the night and not walk alone at night.  
She gives him a hug and walks with him to the front door before kissing him on the cheek before he leaves through the front door. She waves to him and he waves back until she closes the door.  
He starts to walk down the dimly lit street, till he makes it to the crosswalk, cars going by in a flash and the lights more bright and bold compared to his side street.  
He sees JJ where the bold lights start, instead of just finding JJ he also finds a sleek black motorbike that he is leaning against.  
“Wow, aren’t you fifteen?” Ray asks.  
JJ walks up to him and says “Not on my license.”  
“JJ-” Ray starts, nervous about going on the bike.  
“Don’t worry, Ray. we’ll be fine.” JJ assures, smiling at Ray.  
“When will you be sixteen?” Ray asks, hoping to resolve some of the worry.  
“In like a month, don’t worry. I passed this test, we’ll be safe.” JJ assures, gesturing to the bike.  
Ray still looks a bit nervous and JJ says, “Plus, don’t you want to arrive in style?”  
“Why did Blaine give you up? You’re a convincing fuck.” Ray chuckles.  
“How could Joel give you up, you’re so innocent.” JJ smirks.  
Ray grumbles, not wanting to admit, “I’m not innocent.”  
“You’re full of it, if you’re not so innocent then get on my bike.” JJ suggests.  
Ray narrows his eyes, “Dick.”  
JJ passes Ray a helmet from under the seat and says, “Put it on, you know just in case.” a smirk still lingering on his lips.  
They both put on their helmets and JJ gets on first and Ray behind him. Ray looks at JJ’s helmet, dark like Ray’s but a bright yellow lightning bolt on the left side.  
“Nice helmet.” Ray jokes.  
“If you don’t like it, I can just take yours.” JJ points out before driving off, the sound of the bike echoing through the street.  
Ray screams for a moment, his scream covered by the sound of the bike. His screams triggered by the sudden motion of the bike because this is all new for the teen.  
They start to go down the street, making the trek to the other side of the city where the party is.  
“How far is this place really?” Ray asks loudly over the sound of traffic and the bike itself.  
“Far, but don’t worry we’ll get there.” JJ responds.  
As they ride through the city Ray looks at all the flashing lights, clinging to JJ tightly. All the neon signs, streetlights, and car headlights. The moon is in the sky, spraying darkness onto the sky. The tall skyscrapers come into view and their twinkling lights looking like stars in the darken sky.  
Ray never the whole time he has lived here been this far into the city, especially at this time of night.  
They get past the skyliners and into the richer pocket of the city. They past the hospital that Geoff is in and it makes Ray miss Geoff a bit, he was nice to the other teen and made Ray feel comfortable. This also causes Ray’s thoughts to linger to Joel, missing his warm smiles and his kisses.  
They soon get to Blaine's house and JJ parks in the long driveway before he turns off his bike.  
JJ gets off it with ease and Ray shakingly does the same, his legs feeling like jelly as JJ supports him until he can walk back to normal.  
They walk into the massive, light covered house and the see the party is in full swing.  
The masses of people, music and a drink in every hand that make Ray nervous.  
JJ notices and grips Ray‘s wrist and leans to him then says, “You can do this, don’t worry. Let’s just get you downstairs, go through with the plan, and get you something to drink. Things will feel a lot better afterwards.” Then puts his other arm around Ray’s shoulder, squeezing him.  
JJ’s little prep talk didn’t help Ray at all, but the idea of a cold Coke right now did.


	6. Drink

JJ leads Ray downstairs, knowing the house like it’s the back of his hand. JJ has been here enough times, he knows the ins and outs for quick escapes when Blaine's family come home, from whatever rich and fancy thing they did.  
The dancing has moved downstairs to the large basement.   
JJ leads Ray down the polished steps and onto the carpeted floor of the room. All the furniture in the room is moved off to the walls and about ten blue coolers all open, showcasing all the different drinks inside. In the far corner stands Blaine, arm around his girlfriend’s waist.  
JJ notices the pair and leans over to Ray and asks, “Do you want to dance?”  
Ray looks to JJ and replies, “I was promised a drink.”  
“Blaine's over there, I promise I’ll be your drink bitch for the rest of the night if you do this.” JJ promises, his mouth close to Ray’s ear.  
“Fine.” Ray agrees.  
They go to the makeshift dance floor and JJ asks, “Do you know how to dance?”  
“Not the way i should at parties.” Ray replies, making JJ laugh.  
JJ turns him around and puts his hands on Ray’s hips, moving them against JJ and saying, “Like this.”  
This makes Ray’s face go red and question if this fake relationship has gone too far and if JJ is playing him to make him fall in love with the bad boy, but looking up at JJ and how he’s looking at Blaine with determination in his eyes, the look of wanting towards the football player, extinguishes any type of worry in Ray’s mind that comes up.  
JJ moves his hands up to Ray’s middle and Ray starts to dance against JJ’s body, feeling like a total idiot.  
JJ looks from Blaine to Ray and whispers, “Good job.” Before looks back to Blaine with a smirk plaguing his face.  
Blaine looks away, his grip becoming tighter around his red plastic cup. JJ looks back to Ray and says, “I’m going to get us some drinks, I'll meet you over there on that chair right there.”   
He Points to the far corner of the room, as far away as possible from Blaine and his girlfriend.  
Ray nods and JJ walks away to get their drinks. Ray walks to the loveseat and sits down, getting comfy on the soft, worn leather of the chair. He’s amazed at the amount of people in one space and even though there are so many people here everyone seems to having a good time.  
Some dressed in casual clothes, others like Blaine dressed in their football jerseys or in clothes with a rooster printed onto it.  
His view of everyone else becomes covered by someone, Ray looks up to see Blaine towering over him, his arms crossed meaning business.  
“What are you doing with JJ?” He asks.  
“What?” Ray asks, playing dumb.  
That was the strategy, if either Blanie or Joel confronted the other, Ray and JJ were supposed to play stupid.  
“He’s my boyfriend so back off, Squirt.” Blaine warns.  
“Aren’t you with that girl over there, the head cheerleader?” Ray asks.  
Blaine looks to his girlfriend then back to Ray and replies, “It’s a long story, okay? So back the fuck off.”  
“Hey, Blaine, how about you stop trying to bang my boyfriend?” JJ asks in a sarcastic tone, from behind the football player.  
Blaine turns around and JJ gets closer, whispering to the football player, “You know how bad you’ll look if your punch that kid out.”  
“Look, he’s getting on you.” Blaine growls.  
“I know, so how about you get away from him?” JJ warns.  
Blaine takes a step back, fully knowing that JJ is right.  
“Fine.” Blaine grumbles before leaving the pair alone.  
JJ hands Ray a cold glass filled with that Ray assumes is orange soda. He’d prefer a Coke, but this would work as well. It looks lighter than the orange soda he usually drinks.  
He carefully takes a sip, noticing an after taste but, he doesn’t mind.   
He likes the drink and says to JJ, “I really like this, it’s really good.”  
JJ chuckles and Ray makes room for the other teen to sit down.  
“I know, it’s tasty, right? A lot of people like it.” JJ smiles.  
“What do you have?” Ray asks, looking to the glass in JJ’s hands. It looks like a Coke.  
JJ takes a sip before responding, “Rum and Coke, You won’t like it.”  
Ray sits there, observing the others until his phone goes off. He shifts around until he gets his phone out of his pocket and reads the text, it’s from Gavin.  
“My friend is here and he’ll meet up with me later, apparently he caught word of a spin the bottle game.” Ray says, before taking another sip from his drink.  
Within ten minutes JJ is up being Ray’s ‘drink bitch’ and getting him another orange ‘soda’, the whole time Blaine's eyes are burning holes into the back of JJ’s head.  
Joel is upstairs, laying on one of the couches, he moved there after everyone migrated downstairs. Now the living room is a hot spot for a game of spin the bottle.  
The big screen television now showing the news on mute after Joel found the remote while staying alone on the main floor, he has yet to see Ray and starting to think that he won’t show up.  
He looks at the people forming a large circle, a beer bottle in the center of the circle, a trickle beer still in it.  
He notices Ryan, who he waves to, Gavin, who doesn’t seem to notice him but more noticing Ryan who’s across the circle from him.   
Joel also notices Miles and Arryn, Miles in the circle and Arryn outside, sitting behind her boyfriend.  
One of the guys in the circle says “Alright, who wants to start?”  
“How about you Kerry?” Miles chuckles, taking another swig of his beer.  
The teen sticks his tongue out then says, “Fine.”   
Kerry grabs the beer bottle and gives it a spin.  
It lands on Miles and Kerry chuckles, Miles looking over to Arryn who gives him a nod of approval before the brunette leans over and grabs the front of Kerry’s shirt, pulling the other teen into a kiss.  
A few hollers come from the others before Kerry and Miles part. More teens clap and shout at the two teens.  
When they part, their face both flustered.  
Miles grabs the dark bottle then spinning it.  
Arryn chuckles and comments, “Kerry, don’t steal my boyfriend.”  
“I’m trying not too.” Kerry defends, a smile on his face.  
Miles leans over to Kerry even though it has landed on another guy and squishes Kerry's cheeks with one hand and says, “But Arryn, he’s so cute!”  
The three chuckles along with a few of the others in the circle.  
When Miles sits back in his spot, ignoring that it’s his turn, he looks at Joel and asks, “Hey Joel, want to join us?”  
Gavin’s eyes snap to Joel and he gives Joel a look of ‘why are you here?’  
Afraid of being so close to Gavin he replies, “I’ll pass.”  
“Oh come on!” Miles cries, chuckling soon after.  
It’s clear that Miles has had a little too much to drink.  
A few more hollars follow, urging Joel to join them in their little game.  
“Fine.” Joel sighs, setting off the couch and sitting in between Ryan and another teen who Joel doesn’t know.  
“That’s Jordan.” Miles introduces, pointing to the teen beside Joel.  
“Hey.” He says.  
“Hi.” Joel replies.  
He looks to the rest of the circle and notices Gavin’s eyes still on him.   
Joel was starting to think that this was a bad, bad idea, and that’s its too late to turn back now. All Joel hopes is that the bottle doesn’t land on Gavin.  
~~~~~  
Ray feels relaxed, slightly dizzy but otherwise he feels great.  
JJ left a couple minutes ago to get Ray another drink.  
Ray has lost count how many he’s hand, usually when he has a lot of soda he feels hyper but, Ray is starting to guess this isn’t some grocery store off brand soda that he’s been drinking all night.  
JJ returns with only one glass of rum and Coke and Ray looks at him questioningly.  
“Where’s my drink?” Ray asks, giving JJ puppy dog eyes.  
JJ smirks and says, “No more for you.” The patting the top of Ray’s head.  
“How come?” Ray pouts.  
“You, Ray, are”JJ sits down beside Ray, “drunk as hell.”  
“No I’m not!” Ray argues, his voice coming off high pitch.  
JJ chuckles and replies, “Yes you are, I’m going to take you to one of the bedrooms and let you sleep it off for a while.”  
“I don’t want to go to sleep.” Ray grumbles, his forehead now creased like paper.  
“You know those orange sodas I gave you?” JJ asks.  
Ray nods and JJ continues, “There was vodka in them. Now you’re coming with me.”  
JJ grabs Ray’s wrist and leads him to the main floor then to the top floor where there are many doors and there’s a skylight which doesn’t provide any light because it’s night time.  
Ray has a hard time keeping up with JJ, his pace wobbly and his head still dizzy.  
JJ opens the farthest door and leads Ray to the bed. He sets Ray down, the teen flopping on to the bed.  
JJ starts to untie Ray’s shoes and puts them into the hall then goes back into the room. He gets a blanket from a dresser in the far corner before putting it on Ray.  
“I’ll come back in half an hour, okay? You’ll be fine here.” JJ assures, hoping that Ray will be okay.  
“I really liked the drink JJ, thank-you.” Ray mumbles.  
Before JJ leaves he grabs the television remote and puts it beside Ray.  
“I’ll check on you, Ray.” JJ says before closing the door behind him.  
Ray turns on the television and gets comfy in the large, soft bed. More soft than Joel’s bed.  
The thought makes Ray sad and start to whimper, tears threatening to fall.  
“I miss you, Joel.” He whimpers.  
A few tears slip down his cheeks and all these emotions are resurfacing from the alcohol in his system. All he can do is sit up, pull his knees to his chest and cry his eyes out until he can’t cry anymore.  
He misses Joel, as much as Joel hurt him, he misses the older teen. He misses how much Joel made him happy and he felt like he belonged somewhere, he belonged with Joel’s makeshift family.   
Ray after a while manages to wipe off his tears from his face and grab the remote that JJ gave him and watch some television, hoping that a smile will come onto his face.  
~~~  
Downstairs Joel sits there, the bottle has yet to land on him. He isn’t complaining but, he doesn’t like the mini heart attack every time the bottle come his way.  
It’s Gavin’s second turn, last time Jordan kissed him when it was supposed to be Joel. Jordan sensed Joel’s obvious discomfort and took what he called ‘One for the team’, which made Joel chuckle.  
There was a small break for ‘round two’ in which Miles brings beer from downstairs. Joel could’ve easily left but with a beer in his hand he knows that he’s staying.  
The game continues and it starts with Gavin’s turn. Gavin spins the bottle and it lands on a dark haired teen, who neither Joel or Gavin have seen before, not in the halls of either school.  
Gavin leans over and places a kiss on the other teen’s lips.  
When he pulls away the teen says, “Wow.”   
Gavin notices a hint of an accent, he smiles and says, “I know.”  
“Dan.” The brunette smiles.  
“Gavin.” Gavin replies.  
Miles lets out a groan and says, “Stop having all the small talk and lets get this party rolling.”  
Gavin pulls away from Dan and goes back to this seat, still red in the face.  
Dan takes the bottle and spins it, round and round it goes until it slows down. It’s final destination is at Joel.  
“Oh fuck.” Joel says to himself, looking from the bottle to Dan.  
Joel crawls across the circle and pulls Dan in for a kiss. Joel can hear cheering and hollers before he parts with Dan.  
Dan looks at him and gives him a wink before they both sit back down.  
Joel at this point doesn’t think that Gavin could bore any more holes into his head after that kiss.  
They play a bit more until Ryan had the bottle, he had to kiss Jordan for a chance at the bottle.  
Ryan spun it around and everyone found themselves watching the spinning bottle with anticipation of who’s going to go next.  
The bottle lands on Gavin and Gavin who at this point has had a bit more to drink with the help of his new friend Dan, winks at Ryan.  
Gavin leans over and presses a kiss onto Ryan’s lips. Gavin’s tongue darts against Ryan’s lips, making the Brit smirk.  
When they pull apart, Gavin grabs the bottle of beer he’s been drinking and drinking some more.  
After a bit more playing, as Miles and Kerry make out once more, everyone watching the two.  
Joel notices JJ climbing up the stairs from the den. He gets up ignoring everyone's comments and even Dan saying, ”C’mon, one more round.”  
He walks to the staircase and sees JJ going up it with two water bottles in hand, he calls out, “Hey!”  
JJ turns around and asks “What?”  
“Where’s Ray?” Joel asks, starting to climb the stairs.  
“Upstairs, most likely asleep.” JJ replies, not seeing the problem in this.  
Joel soon gets right in JJ’s fact and asks, “What?”  
“I’m going to check on him.” JJ replies.  
“What did you do to him?” Joel asks, getting more angry.  
“He drank a bit and got dizzy and tired, so I put him in the guest room for a little bit.” JJ explains.  
Joel notices a dark red mark on JJ’s neck, where his neck and shoulder meet.  
“Did he give you that?” Joel asks, gesturing to the mark.  
JJ covers it up quickly and says sharply, “No.”  
“Are you sure?” Joel asks.  
“Yes.” JJ replies.  
JJ starts to go upstairs, Joel follows the other teen till they reach the top floor. Joel then pins JJ to the wall and asks, “What the fuck are you doing to him?”  
“Nothing.”  
“Then why are you with him?” Joel asks.  
JJ realizes that this isn’t just about right now, this is about the past week with the constant affection that Ray and JJ have been giving to each other to make the others jealous.  
“I’ll break your neck if you don’t tell me why.” Joel growls, his patience wearing thin.  
He has never been in such close proximity with JJ, all the anger that Joel has both towards to the other teen and himself for messing up the relationship are starting to show.  
“If you want answers, ask your boyfriend.” JJ replies, half shouting as he pushes the bottles of water into the older teens arms then adding, “Go back to him, he wants you.”   
JJ storms away, the other stood in shock.  
Joel notices one of the doors is slightly open, he walks towards it and sees Ray in the bed, shirtless and a blanket up to his ribs.  
“JJ?” Ray asks.  
“No.” Joel says quietly.  
“JJ, you can’t fool me. Dora is so fucked up man, it’s not el chocolate. It’s el coca. Dora is such a crazy person.” Ray chuckles, soon going into a fit of giggles.  
Joel walks further into the room and Ray’s eyes go wide and he says, “You’re not JJ.”  
“Ray-” Joel starts.  
“Joel, please leave.” Ray says.  
“Let me say something.” Joel says then adding, “I’m tired of these game, I want to be with you more than anything else in this world.”   
He pauses, noticing Ray getting all teary eyed before continuing, “I love you, Ray and I haven’t been drinking. I mean it, if that means that if you want me to wait till the end of time, I will. I never meant to hurt you and my family blew it out of proportions. When I saved you that day, you saved me as well. You saved me from being this loner who didn’t do anything. Now I’m at a party, a party of all places. I came here because I wanted to say these things to you and make everything better. I know it’ll take time but, I want you to think about it. Now I’m going to leave.” He turns around, ready to leave the room.  
“Wait!” Ray cries, causing Joel to turn around.  
Joel looks back to Ray and Ray explains, “I’m sorry, too. I’m fake dating JJ because he wanted to get back at this guy who’s hosting this party and I was getting back at you for breaking my heart. I think they’re getting back together soon, so I’ll be all alone. I love you Joel, maybe for a little while we shouldn’t be together, give me sometime not to be drunk. When I’m all better, I’ll be the best, the best there ever was.” He smiles at Joel.  
“Want to go home?” Joel asks.  
“Which home?” Ray asks innocently.  
“My home.” Joel replies.  
Ray sits up and wraps his arms around his knees and says innocently, “What if I said no?”  
“I would ask: why?” Joel replies, sitting on the bed.  
Ray shrugs once more and says, “It was just a hypothetical question.”  
“So do you want to go home then?” Joel asks, patting Ray’s knee.  
“Which home?” Ray asks.  
Joel lets out a sigh and gets up, Ray letting go of his knees.  
“You know which home, the home with the soft bed.” Joel says.  
Ray slowly gets up and nods at Joel.  
His stance is a bit shaky and Joel helps him out of the room and down the stairs. When the reach the front door, Joel pulls out his phone and texts Burnie for him to pick them up, giving an explanation of why Ray is with him.  
Ray looks over, seeing in the corner Blaine and JJ, making out. Blaine has JJ pinned to the wall, leaving kisses up JJ’s neck, occasionally marking the skin. Thier gaze meet and Ray gives him a thumbs to signal mission accomplish; they both got what they wanted in the end. JJ nods, before Blaine, moves closer to JJ, their bodies pressing together.  
Joel opens the front door and exits with Ray in tow. They go to the porch and sit by the front steps. They can hear the music playing in the backyard, Ray rests his head on Joel’s shoulder.  
“I’m glad you saved me.” Ray mumbles, the fresh air sobering him up a bit.  
Joel looks to Ray and says, “Anything that has happened, anything that will happen will never, ever make me regret saving you. You’re my little fish and as long as you’re in school, I’m looking after you.”  
“My plan was stupid.” Ray comments, in a low voice.  
“You took the smart way, I would have beaten everyone in sight.” Joel points out.  
“Do you think we’ll ever get back together?” Ray asks, playing with his thumbs like a small child.  
Joel replies, “When you’re ready.”  
“I think, I’m ready now.” Ray says, looking to Joel.  
Joel can feel his heart hammering in his chest, the pieces once shattered like broken glass now coming back together. Their mission was over and it was a success, now all Joel hopes is that tomorrow morning Ray will have the same response as he does right now.  
Burnie arrives to the house and Joel notices that Ray is falling asleep against him. Picking him up and holding him bridal style, he carries Ray to the van where he gets a very suspicious look from Burnie.  
“He’s asleep.” Joel comments, dismissing all thoughts that Burnie had about Joel drugging the younger teen.  
Burnie gets out of the van and opens the sliding door for Joel then Joel puts Ray in the seat and buckles him in for the drive home.  
Joel goes around the car to the passenger side and gets in. “Thanks.”   
“Are you sure you didn’t drug him?” Burnie asks.  
“I’m sure. That JJ kid got him drunk and now he’s asleep.” Joel replies, looking back to see Ray dead asleep, looking like a small child.  
“How’s that JJ kid doing? Need to hide a body?” Burnie asks, chuckling to himself as he drives off.  
“No, apparently JJ wanted another guy. Him and Ray had a plan to make both me and this other guy jealous till we took them back.”  
“Wow, ninth graders are fucked up.” Burnie comments.  
“You can say that again.” Joel says, relaxing in the worn seat of the van.  
The ride home Joel takes a few looks at Ray, what he said still going through Joel’s mind. Joel still hopes that wasn’t the alcohol talking and Ray is willing to try again and not mess things up again.


	7. Shitty Mix CDs and Stuffed Pelicans

The next morning Ray wakes up, his body covered in blankets and he’s on a soft bed. He slowly opens his eyes, the morning light piercing them, making him close them quickly and turning to his side letting out a groan.  
His head is throbbing and he feels like throwing up. He covers his face with the soft pillow, noticing that it’s not his. It smells like Joel, which causes Ray to snap upwards, but quickly slumping back down because it feels like someone hit him upside the head with a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wired.  
“Fuck.” He groans.  
“Hey Joel, I think your Little Fish is awake!” Ray hears someone yell which only causes his headache to get worse.  
Ray hears footsteps get closer to the room and the door opening with a ‘squeak’. Ray peaks from the pillow with blurry eyes due to a lack of glasses on his face.  
“Hey, Ray.” Ray hears someone say in a soft voice, instantly recognizing it as Joel’s voice.  
Ray lets out a groan. Suddenly there are his glass on top of the pillow covering his head. Ray grabs them and puts them on, the sun looking more clear which makes him groan louder.  
The bed dips and Ray feels Joel’s hands on the younger teen’s shoulders.  
“Are you okay?” Joel whispers.  
“No.” Ray groans, his voice muffled.  
‘Want some water?” Joel asks, pulling the pillow away a bit, to see Ray’s face.  
Ray looks back to Joel and nods his head.  
“You have a hangover.” Joel points out.  
Ray asks “Why am I here?”  
“Do you not remember last night?” Joel asks, swallowing hard.  
“Bits and pieces. I remember making up.” Ray says, with a small smile on his face.  
Joel pats the pillow and says “Well, you got drunk and took care of you.”  
“Thank you,” Ray says then muttering “Asshat.”  
Joel smirks and replies “I heard that.” Then moves the pillow fully away from Ray’s face, which causes the younger teen to groan loudly.  
Joel places a kiss on Ray’s cheek before putting the pillow back on his face.  
“I love you, asshat.” Ray mummbles  
“Love you too, Mr. Hangover.” Joel smiles, before getting up and getting Ray some Tylenol and a glass of water.  
When he gets into the kitchen, he sees Burnie in the kitchen, cleaning up some plates.  
“How is he doing?” Burnie asks, looking to Joel.  
“What do you think, he has a hangover.” Joel replies, grabbing the bottle of Tylenol from the cupboard, then saying to Burnie “You know these are expired, right?” Then holding up the bottle, shaking it to get his point across.  
“They’re fine, it’s like rat poison, it’s only less effective.” Burnie shrugs, putting the dishes in the drainer.  
Joel gets a glass of water before going back to the bedroom.  
Burnie’s happy to see Joel and Ray back together, he’s glad they got back together because they wanted to and nobody drugged anyone in the process. The idea of a drunk Ray makes him chuckle.  
Joel walks back into the bedroom and finds the blinds closed, keeping the sunlight out and moved closer to the wall, his face facing the blue painted wall.  
“Hey Ray, seems that you closed the blinds.” Joel chuckles, putting the glass of water and pills on the dresser.   
He hears behind him, “He’s dead.”   
Joel snaps around and sees Gus staring at him.  
“What?” Joel asks, half yelling.  
Gus’ stone cold expression quickly breaks into a full out gein and starts to laugh.  
Joel stands there dumbfounded until Gus says, “I’m just fucking kidding.”   
Which causes Joel to go over to Gus and starts to fight the other teen.  
“You dick!” Joel growls, having Gus now pinned down throwing a punch, not hard though because he can hear Ray’s steady and heavy breathing from the bed.   
Joel only stops when he hears Ray groaning, still holding Gus down he asks, “Are you alright, Ray?”   
He gets off of Gus and walks to the bed.  
“Hey.” Joel says softly.  
“I’m not dead.” Ray groans.  
Joel grabs the glass and the pills before handing them to Ray.  
Ray takes them quickly gulps down the rest of the water before handing the glass back to Joel.  
“Thanks. I’m never drinking again in my life.” Ray says weakly.  
“We all say that.” Joel chuckles.  
Ray says in a serious but, weak voice, “I really mean it.”  
“Whatever you say, just get some rest, okay?” Joel says, before kissing Ray on his warm cheek.  
“What about me?” Gus asks.  
Joel turns around to look at Gus and asks, “Want me to kiss you?”  
“No you fucking idiot, help me up.” Gus snaps.  
Joel walks over and helps Gus up and onto his feet.  
“Dickhead.” Gus grumbles, loud enough for Joel to hear.  
“A thank you would’ve been nice, Gus.” Joel chuckles.  
“You didn’t do me any damn favors.” Gus points out as he goes to his bunk.  
Joel can hear Ray chuckling from behind him.  
\---  
By the late afternoon into the early evening, Ray is moving around is less hunger over than he was in the morning. His headache is still there but he doesn’t have the urge to vomit anymore. Ray eventually decides that he’s well enough to walk home, not wanting to worry his grandma anymore than she is already. He’s able to walk around properly and he doesn’t feel sick.  
Joel walks the other teen home. The sun now bleeding into the sky before the night takes over, the sky full of vibrant colors that shine the street in a nice calm light even with the howling traffic.  
“Are we together?” Joel asks, looking forward,  
“Yeah, do you not remember last night.” Ray responds along with a chuckle.  
Joel looks down at Ray and asks “So a date then?”  
“Y-yeah. That would be great.” Ray responds, getting embarrassed.  
“The movies?” Joel suggests, looking at Ray.  
Ray nods and Joel kisses the top of Ray’s head then says “Tomorrow I have something for you.”  
“Really?” Ray asks, then adds “You don’t have too, everything is okay.”  
“It’s something small, it has nothing to do with what happened.” Joel explains.  
They both smile, glad that they’re both back together again.  
“I’m glad I’m going on a date with you.” Ray says.  
“Thanks, I guess.” Joel replies, not really knowing what to say.  
“It’s because Michael and Gavin are giving each other the silent treatment and I hate having to hang out with one and then the other. Michael kept texting me all morning to hang out, I told him I was dealing with a hangover.” Ray explains.  
“See him another time, then.” Joel suggests  
“I’m just glad because I’m sick and tired of their fighting, Gavin’s willing to talk things out but, Michael doesn't want to. I’ll probably see Michael next weekend.” Ray sighs.  
“It’s okay, Ray. They’ve known each other for so long, I promise everything will be okay.” Joel assures, kissing Ray’s cheek.  
“Thanks, Joel.” Ray responds, looking up to Joel.  
Once they get to Ray’s house, Joel walks Ray to the door.   
The last bits of sunshine showcase Ray’s almost faded bruise that once heavy marked his cheek.  
“Are you going to miss that bruise?” Joel asks, chuckling.  
The bruise held a lot of meaning, how and when they met and it’s healing process like the healing process of their relationship.  
“No way in hell, I’m glad it’s almost gone.” Ray replies.  
Joel leans in and kisses the younger teen’s cheek, where the bruise was.   
The front door opens, revealing Ray’s grandma.  
Ray sees her and see how she’s boring holes into Joel’s head.   
“Hola, Abuela.” Ray says, making Joel let go of Ray and stepping back.  
She looks at her grandson and says calmly, “Por favor, vaya dentro, Ray, es tarde.”   
“Abuelita.” Ray says, not wanting to go inside.  
She gives him a stern look and Ray lets out a sigh and goes inside.  
“Bye, Joel.” Ray says before going inside.  
His grandma looks at Joel and says to him in very broken English, “Don’t hurt... him... again.”  
Joel replies, “I won’t, I promise.”  
She nods before closing the door and Joel starts to walk back home, night settling in.  
When Joel gets home Ray texts him saying, “I was talking to JJ, he suggested that we have a ‘double date’ because Blaine's family doesn’t know and they want to go out, it’s just for dinner and then we can split off. I know you don’t like either or them but, they won’t be accepted as well as we were, at least not yet.”  
“Promise there won’t be any problems, JJ isn’t necessarily a good guy.” Joel replies.  
Ray soon answers, “Everything will be fine. Who knows maybe Blaine will get in trouble.”  
Joel knows that Ray and JJ talk, he doesn’t mind he thinks it’s good that Ray makes friends even when he can’t see Gavin and Michael everyday.  
“He did get you drunk though, and maybe I was talking about the other guy.” Joel replies.  
“It’ll just be for a short while, I promise. Afterwards we can see a movie.” Ray texts back.  
Joel looks at the message, asking himself if this was a good idea, he starts to think that it’ll eased the tension of a first date and JJ did try to fix his problem of getting Ray drunk before Joel intervened, and Blaine is extremely ‘popular’ and it’ll be more of a scandal rather than Joel and Ray being together.  
Before Joel responds he gets a message from Ray saying, “Pleaseeeee.”  
Joel chuckles and types back, “Fine, but it’s still on Tuesday.”  
He puts the phone down beside him as he lies down on the bed.   
The next morning Matt tells everyone that Geoff is coming home, which lead to some cheers especially from Burnie and Joel. The problem was that they all have to go to school, which gives Kara a look of ‘oh shit’ which can only lead Joel to believe that she didn’t do her homework.  
Joel feel extremely exhausted because he spent most of the previous night working on Ray’s gift, it was cheesy as anything but, he knows that Ray will like it.  
He left home early and walks to Ray’s house before he goes to school. He knocks on the door, the gift is in a bag meant for birthdays and Joel just assumed that it was something else because it was extremely dark that night.  
When he knocks on the door there is some yelling in Spanish before the door opens revealing Ray in his uniform shirt but, still in his pyjama bottoms.  
“Uh, hey.” Joel says, with a smile.  
Ray yawns before asking, “Why are you here so early?”  
“I have something for you.” Joel replies, his smile getting wider.  
“The ‘surprise’ gift that isn’t an apology gift?” Ray asks with a sleep smile.  
“Maybe.” Joel replies, handing the gift to the other teen.  
Ray accepts the bag and comments with a smile, “You know my birthday is in September.”  
“Well, I can always take it back.” Joel remarks jokingly, reaching for the bag.  
Ray steps back, keeping the bag away from Joel as he says, “That’s fine, I like this.”   
Joel chuckles, as Ray looks at the bag, noticing what’s on it.  
“It was dark, I didn’t realize that it had happy birthday on it. I had to sneak into my sister’s room and take it.” He explains.  
“I thought she wasn’t you sister.” Ray chuckles.  
Joel leans against the door frame and replies, “It depends on the day and if she isn’t going through my stuff. Now open your gift.”   
Ray looks down at the bag and takes out all the tissue paper inside and pulls out a plush pelican from the bag. He looks at it and asks Joel with arched eyebrows, “You gave me a plush pelican because I told you about my traumatic experience.”  
“I thought you would find it funny.” Joel comments, feeling bad because he might of offended Ray.  
Ray looks down at it, with a smile forming on his face as he replies, “I do like it, I just find it funny that you get me a stuff toy on the pelican even though I got attacked by one.”   
“There’s also something else in the bag.” Joel smiles.  
Ray looks into the bed and pulls out a CD, there’s a poorly drawn picture of the two of them with the words: ‘Joelay; Doesn’t That Sound Catchy?’  
This makes Ray chuckles and say “A mix CD.”  
“Yeah.” Joel agrees.  
Ray starts to look at the back with all the songs on them.  
"I made you a CD because I can't really express all this love I have for you. I'm sorry if the songs are shitty." Joel explains, with a nervous smile.  
"Why is 'What is Love' on this?” Ray asks, looking up to Joel.  
"I thought my love could be expressed through a dance song." Joel replies, shrugging.  
This makes Ray chuckles and Joel asks, “Do you like it?”  
“I do, now let me get ready and we’ll walk to school together.” Ray replies.  
He lets Joel inside and he waits in the living room until Ray is ready for school, in his uniform and his backpack all ready they head off to school.  
“Did I show you the drunk text from Gavin?” Ray asks, as they approach the crosswalk.  
Joel shakes his head and asks, “Are you sure you didn’t send any to him?” then chuckles.  
Ray nudges Joel and says with a grin, “Shut up.”   
He takes his phone out and shows the picture that Gavin sent him from the party.  
The picture catched Joel off guard, it’s a picture of Gavin kissing Ryan on the lips. It’s obvious that Gavin took the picture but the way the camera was and where Gavin’s hands were. Gavin’s eyes are locked with the camera lens while Ryan is deep into the kiss, eyes shut and mouth pressed firmly against Gavin’s, his arms around the Brit.  
“Oh, fuck.” Joel says, loud enough for Ray to hear.  
Ray looks away from his phone and asks, ‘What?”  
Joel looks away too and responds, “I know that guy.”  
“Of course you know, Gavin.” Ray points out, confused by what Joel just said.  
Joel mentally hits himself and corrects himself, “The guy Gavin’s kissing.”  
“Really?” Ray asks.  
“Yeah. He’s in my drama group, I saw him at the party. His name is Ryan, I thought he wasn’t going.” Joel explains.  
“Look like he had fun.” Ray chuckles. “Gavin also mentioned that you were at that spin the bottle game.”  
Joel goes quiet for a moment then admits, “Yeah. I only kissed one guy. He was an exchange student, your friend Gavin also took a liking to him.”   
He looks to Ray with sorry eyes.  
“We weren’t technically together and it was a party, also Gavin said you were drinking a bit. No worries, just promise me you won’t do it again, because we are together now.” Ray explains, looking at Joel.  
“Of course, I promise.There’s no one else like you, plus there was no way out of it until I saw JJ then I stopped giving a fuck and went over to almost beat him up.” Joel replies.  
Ray nods and kisses Joel on the cheek, knowing that Joel wouldn’t pull something like that.  
They soon cross the street and cross through the playground of the elementary school and enter the high school past it.  
While walking down the hall to Joel’s locker they past Jack and his group of friends.  
“Hey, Joel.” Jack smiles, waving to the other teen.  
“Oh, hey.” Joel replies, looking at Jack.  
Jack looks to Ray and then to Joel and asks, “Who’s your friend?”  
Joel looks to Ray then back to Jack and replies with a smile on his face, “My boyfriend.”  
Jack breaks into a grin and says, “Glad you found somebody, Joel.”  
“Uh, thanks.” Joel replies, smiling because it was true, Jack doesn’t have a mean bone in his body.  
They walk to Joel’s locker, even with the occasional look from some students.  
At Joel’s locker Ray asks leaning against the locker, “Are you excited for Geoff coming home?”  
“I am, all he really wants is to come home and play XBox till he passes out.” Joel replies, slightly chuckling as he puts his science textbook into his bag.  
“Are you doing anything?” Ray asks.  
Joel shrugs and replies, “I think we’re going to the buffet near the highway, do you want to come?”  
“I don’t want to be costly.” Ray replies.  
“You won’t, don’t worry. Sarge has coupons.” Joel assures.  
The thought makes Ray chuckles, the idea of an army sergeant with coupons for dinner.  
“I never got to ask you this, but why do you call your parents Tex and Sarge?” Ray asks.  
“Well, Matt sometimes acts like a sergeant and Kathleen is a total badass and it fits her.” Joel replies, closing his locker then asking, “So do you want to come with us?”  
Ray nods and says with a chuckle, “Sure, I guess that will make it two dates.”  
“It’s more like a family celebration, don’t get too kissy with me.” Joel teases, then kissing the top of Ray’s nose.  
“Hey, lovebirds!” Someone says behind them, making them instantly look over.  
They see Burnie walking towards them with a brown paper bag in hand.  
“What’s in the bag?” Joel asks.  
Burnie responds by throwing it at Joel then responding with, “Your lunch, dumbass.”  
“Thanks.” Joel responds as he catches the bag. “Ray is coming to dinner tonight.”   
“Why do I care?” Burnie asks.  
“So you can maybe tell Tex or Sarge?” Joel asks sarcastically.  
“I’ll do it, I don’t think she’ll care. Also Geoff might like not being the only person bringing a date.” Burnie comments.  
“Thanks.” Joel says before Burnie leaves to his locker.  
The bell rings, signalling the start of the first period.  
“Well I guess I should go to class.” Ray says, kissing Joel on the lips before walking to his first class, Joel watching as his boyfriend walks away.  
The day itself was uneventful, nothing interesting other than a English test review and a math quiz.  
In drama though Jack started to ask questions about Ray, with Barbara and Ryan listening carefully, the blonde-haired making puns as much as she could that would make everyone groan.  
By the end of the day, Ray and Joel walk to Joel’s house, having been let out early. When they get to the house, Joel knocks on the door, instead of Gus or Burnie answering it, when the door opens, it reveals Geoff who is wearing his normal clothes instead of a depressing hospital gown   
“Oh my god, Geoff!” Joel shouts, breaking in a full grin and hugging Geoff tightly.  
“Hey, Joel. Hey, Ray.” Geoff greets as Joel hangs off of him.  
“I'm so glad you’re home.” Joel cries, excited that Geoff’s finally home.  
Joel eventually lets go off Geoff and they all enter the house.  
“How are you doing?” Joel asks.  
“Better, I’m just glad I’m finally home.” Geoff replies, moving out of the way so the other two teens can take off their shoes.  
The three go to Geoff and Joel’s room, and Geoff sits on his bed where a ‘get well soon’ balloon is tied to the headboard. Joel and Ray sit on Joel’s bed.  
“I’m really glad that you and Joel are back together, I like you, Little Fish, even though I thought you were going to replace me in the home.” Geoff explains, leaning across and patting Ray on the shoulder.  
“Thanks.” Ray smiles.  
“I’m also really glad that you’re coming to dinner with us. I have a feeling you’re going to be here for a while.” Geoff chuckles, making Ray blush.  
“Thanks.” Ray replies, smiling.  
Geoff flops down onto his bed. “Sadly, I won’t be driving for a while, I really fucking hope that Burnie is taking care of her.”  
“He is, don’t worry.” Joel replies.  
“Guys! We’re leaving for dinner!” Matt yells from the living room.  
“Dinner!” Geoff cheers as he gets up.  
Joel chuckles and they all get up, leaving the bedroom and towards the living room.  
“We’re taking the van and the car, Kara went over for Griffon so she’s probably outside.” Burnie explains as he puts on his shoes then leaving the house.  
Once outside Geoff stands in front of the van and once Griffon gets close enough to him, he introduces her to the van which makes her chuckle, before climbing inside.  
Matt, Geoff, Griffon, Joel, and Ray are all in the van while Kathleen, Burnie, Gus, and Kara are all in the car.  
Geoff and Joel sit in the far back of the van, messing around with each other, laughing and pretending to beat each other up while Ray and Griffon sit in the middle.  
When they start their drive to the buffet Griffon looks to Ray, “Geoff told me what happened between you and Ray.”  
Ray nods, not really knowing what else to do or say.  
“Just remember this, that idiot behind us will always love you and care about you. If you realize that every bump in the road will clear itself up, everything will be fine.” She continues.  
“Thank-you.” Ray replies, with a slight blush forming on his cheeks.  
They soon arrive to the buffet and Geoff shouts, “Food!” before hi-fiving Joel and Griffon with his non-bandaged hand.  
They all walk in together like some sort of family pieced together by love, which they are and soon get a table that seats all of them, then the planning of deciding who gets food is a topic of discussion before they get their meals.  
It’s decided that Geoff should get his food first because this whole dinner is because of his safe recovery so far, he decides that him, Griffon, Matt and Kathleen should go first.  
Gus, Kara, and Burnie say they’ll go after and Joel and Ray offer to go last because there isn’t any other times to go other than then.  
Joel explains to Ray that this is normal for when they go out, sometimes they even sit at separate tables, but that happened more before Joel came into the home and when the others were younger and Matt and Kathleen would go on dates with other people.  
This prompts Ray to asks as quietly as possible, “So that means that they aren’t together?”  
Joel holds back a chuckle and replies, “They aren't together, they’re just really close friends. I don’t know what made them take all of us in, I think they had a similar life to ours and wanted to protect us from whatever they faced.”  
Joel wasn’t lying about what he knows, Matt and Kathleen weren’t so open about their past before they took all them in. It left a lot to the imagination to them when they were younger, becoming topic for the, late at night when Kara would creep into the boy’s room and they’d talk about what they thought happened to them, even though Kathleen was in the next room and they weren’t very quiet, and Kara’s footsteps were loud enough so Matt could hear them from the basement room he slept in. There were a few times where one of them would come in and make them go to bed.  
There was one time that Kathleen brought some information about her past but, only to Kara and she wasn’t allowed to tell anyone about it, ever. When they boys came home from beating up Kara’s abusive boyfriend, Kathleen went in Kara’s room and was in there for a long time. When Joel pressed his ear against the wood of the door, he heard murmurs but, nothing of clear detail.  
It’s soon their turn to get food and Joel quickly notices that Ray doesn’t have a lot food on his plate.  
“Why aren’t you eating?” Joel asks, looking at Ray’s nearly empty plate.  
“I’m not finished filling the plate yet.” Ray replies, sticking his tongue out.  
Joel looks to Ray and points out, “I saw you go through the whole place.”  
“I’m not too hungry today.” Ray responds.  
“Take at least one more thing, please.” Joel says, kissing Ray’s forehead, which they both hear Geoff groaning in the background.  
‘I thought you’d be at the table.” Joel says, pointing to the table in the dining room of the restaurant.  
“I’ve been eating hospital food for more than two weeks, so I’m eating a lot because apparently I lost ten pounds.” Geoff shrugs, filling his plate once more.  
Ray looks to Joel and says jokingly, “He’ll eat the food I won't.”  
Joel and Ray go back to the table and start to eat their first round of food.  
The dinner is full of laughs, teasing, storytelling, and a broken water glass that Geoff tips over, which makes him extremely embarrassed.  
At one point during the dinner Kathleen asks Ray, “Has Joel ever told you the story of the waterpark?”  
“What?” Ray asks.  
Joel shakes his head and says, “No, don’t tell him.”  
Kathleen smirks and starts to retell the story.  
What happened was when Joel first came to the house he was very quiet and very upset at his mother’s passing. After a month of being the in the home the whole family decided to take a trip to the water park. Now, Joel had always been a big fan of water slides so he grabbed his new found friend, Geoff and went to the highest water slide in the whole water park. They both went together and as they slide down the waterslide they both heard something rip, it wasn’t until they got to the end that both Geoff and Joel realized that Joel’s swim trunks had split, causing anyone to see Joel’s butt if he got out of the pool below. This caused Joel to be embarassed to the point of tears and Geoff having to call Matt over to help the other boy out of the pool and have a towel around Joel’s butt so no one saw what they didn’t want to see. After Matt got Joel out of the water, Joel had to sit out for the rest of the day because there wasn’t an extra pair of swim trunks for him to wear but, he didn’t sit alone. Geoff decided that it wasn’t fair and tried to rip his swim trunks as well but, it didn’t work so instead he sat with Joel for the rest of the day. At one point stealing coins from Kathleen’s wallet so they could get sodas from the over priced vending machine.  
Once Kathleen finished retelling her story, Geoff hi-fives a heavily embarrassed Joel from across the table.  
Ray chuckles before taking another bite of his breaded shrimp that’s on his fork.  
The rest of the dinner goes well, Ray feeling more comfortable than ever around Joel’s family and in fact enjoys being around them.  
The others crack jokes at Joel only to have Joel crack more jokes back.  
It made Ray realize that even though they weren’t related, this is Joel’s family just like Ray and his grandma are family. He knew this before he up that his point, he has never seen it in action, with all the worry and pain over Geoff’s attempted suicide Ray never saw what Joel’s family was really like, and now with everything piecing back together Ray can see what the family is really like, and what Ray saw was something funny and full of jokes and life, even with different blood coursing through their veins, they were still a family.  
The drive home goes by in a blur, the night covering the sky, bruising it with dark purples and almost blacks, the only light up there being from the moon, the street light guiding them to Ray’s house and the directions from Joel. They pull into driveway and all say goodbye to Ray.  
Joel leans in and kisses Ray on lips, causing Geoff to make fake puking noises.  
Ray gets out into the cool night and walks to the stairs, waving to the others in the van.  
They wave goodbye to Ray as they drive away. A smile still lingers on his lips when he knocks on the door to his home, ready to curl up into bed and sleep the night away, so he isn’t exhausted for the double date tomorrow.  
When his grandma answers it, she has a look of sadness on her face.  
“¿Qué es?” Ray asks, his smile melting to a look of concern with his forehead creased.  
She starts to ramble, Ray not being able to translate what she is saying because she is speaking in such a frantic tone.  
“La abuela, por favor, cálmate. Por favor.” Ray says, holding her shoulders, hoping to calm her down.  
She hugs him tightly, starting to cry into his shoulder.  
Ray’s heart feels like it’s being ripped from his chest, his tears wetting his shirt and she starts to ramble on. She says one word that Ray catches and that makes everything become clear.  
“Dad.” He translates in a soft tone, feeling every emotion towards the man come out in tears as he stands there, hugging his grandma as hard as he ever has in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Mix CD Joel gives Ray: http://8tracks.com/apeskyhedgehog/joelay-sounds-catchy-right  
> I'm so sorry about the super long wait, it's just that chapter 8 is taking forever and I don't want a too long gap between the two, I hope everyone enjoys this chapter


	8. Around The Corner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the second final chapter to this fic, I hope everyone has enjoyed the journey so far. I hope everyone enjoys this and I'm sorry that this took so long

Soon they go back inside, Ray feeling shaky and uneasy, all feelings of happiness draining from him. His grandma leads him to the living room and long behold, his father sits there on the couch Ray has sat on all his life.  
His father looks different than the photographs he saw when he was a kid, those images were all memories Ray had of his father up until this point.  
He looks at Ray.  
“Hello.” The man says with a smile full of yellow teeth that reminds Ray of corn rather than teeth.  
“Why are you here?” Ray asks, stepping in front of his grandma for fear of her getting harmed.  
Ray knew he was a shy and docile boy, but when it came to his grandma, he’d protect her at all and every cost. She was his family; his only family.  
“Because I wanted to see my son. Play ball with him, go to the local burger place and have dinner with him.” His father explains.  
“You had that chance, you had that chance fourteen fucking years ago!” Ray shouts, all the anger that he has felt throughout his lifetime starts to burst through the barricades it was suppressed by for so long.  
“Please, Ray. I was scared when your mother told me.” He explains calmly, contrasting to his son’s angry tone.  
“Were you so screwed that you couldn’t come to her fucking funeral?!” Ray argues, clenching his fists.  
“I just want to make amends, maybe start a father son relationship, I know I’ve been absent most of your life- I want to change that.” His father explains.  
Ray feels a hand on his shoulder, he looks around and sees that his grandma.  
“La abuela?” He asks.  
“Por favor, ve con él. Sólo por un ratito.” She replies, giving him a small, yet sad, smile.  
Ray looks back to his father.   
Even his posture pisses Ray off, the slouched look, an air of relaxation in a home he isn’t wanted in.  
“What will it be?” His father asks, arching an eyebrow.  
Ray takes one last look at his grandma before looking back at his father and asking, “Yeah, okay, for a bit, what do you want to do?”  
His father looks at his watch before saying, “How about the diner at the plaza?”  
“Fine.” Ray replies gravely, adding. “But we’re walking. I don’t trust you.”  
His father smiles and gets up then says, “Fine by me.”  
“Te prometo que estaré en casa pronto.” Ray says to his grandma as his father walks to the door.  
She nods and gives him a kiss on the cheek before saying, “Asegúrese de llamar si algo sale mal.”  
Ray grabs a sweatshirt from the main closet before leaving the house with his father, into the cool and dark night.  
Once they are outside they begin walking down the dimly light street.  
When they reach the main road, Ray looks to his father and asks, “Why are you here really?”  
His father looks at him and replies, “I’ve been looking for you, Ray. You are my son after all.”  
“You ran away like the fucking coward you are.” Ray growls.  
“One day you’ll learn that you have to make choices, and sometimes those choices won’t please everyone.” His father explains.  
Ray looks ahead as they cross the street and mumbles to himself, “You chose only for yourself.”  
They soon get to the diner and are seated at a booth near the large front windows. They sit across from one another, Ray sitting closest to the door.  
“Why do you look so upset?” His father asks, looking to his son then grabbing one of the menus on the table.  
“What do you think? You just stroll back into my life and expect me to wrap my arms around you and yell ‘Daddy!’?” Ray replies harshly.  
“I didn’t expect that, I just want our relationship to be better.”  
Ray remains quiet, still fuming over his father’s actions.  
The door to the diner opens with a chim and Ray can hear laughter and shouting. He looks over and sees the cheerleaders and football players.   
He notices Blaine and his girlfriend, which makes Ray bite his lip.  
JJ had said during science class that morning that Blaine was going to talk to his dad about him being with JJ, but it looks to Ray like that didn’t happen.  
Blaine notices Ray and excuses himself from the others in order to talk to the other teen.  
“Hey, Ray.” Blaine smiles, waving to Ray.  
“Hi.” Ray says shortly.  
Blaine leans against the side of the booth and asks with a smile, “Are you excited for the date tomorrow?”  
“What date?” His father asks, from the other side of the booth.  
They both look to Ray’s father and Blaine asks Ray, “Oh, er, sorry I didn’t see- Who’s this, Ray?”  
“My father.” Ray replies gravely. “Unfortunately.”   
“Oh, fuck, sorry.” Blaine says.  
“I’ll talk to you later.” Ray says, signalling that Blaine should leave.  
Blaine nodded, giving a quick, sympathetic expression before he walks off.  
Ray’s father, once relaxed, now looks more rigid and tense. “What was he talking about? Are you going out with him?”  
“No, I’m not, I’m going out with another guy called Joel.” Ray explains.  
There’s a tense silence before Ray’s father relaxes and replies, “That’s great.”   
Ray knows that he is lying through his teeth, his father’s posture is still tense but not as tense as before, he is obviously not happy about the news.  
“When’s this date?” His father asks.  
“I don’t want to tell you that.” Ray replies shortly.  
Ray’s father closes the menu and sets it down and says, “I’m just interested, Ray.”  
“I’m never telling you.”  
“Ray, please. You know, I could just ask your grandma.” His father continues, putting his hands on the table.  
Thoughts of his grandma ran through Ray’s mind, making his jaw clench tightly and eventually give up the information.  
“Just here, around eight, tomorrow.” Ray sighs.  
“I hope you have fun.” His father says.  
The waitress comes by and his father orders for both of them.  
“I would’ve prefered a Coke.” Ray comments, looking out the large, clean window.  
“Well, you're not the one paying.” His father points out.  
Ray’s eye flick to his father and he says “You don’t know anything about me.” Then looking down and pulling out his phone.  
He thinks of calling his grandma and running out of the diner, but in the back of his mind he has thoughts of his father coming back to the house and possibly harming his grandma.   
Instead he texts Joel. “Guess what, devil came to my house, it’s my dad. He may try to pull some shit so please be careful.”  
“Don’t use your phone at the table.” His father comments, causing Ray to look at him.  
“Why not?” Ray asks.  
“It’s rude, do you do that with your friends?” His father asks.  
“At least my friends don’t abandon me.” Ray replies quietly.  
His father looks at him and says sharply, breaking his once calm posture, “Don’t talk to me like that, I’m your dad.”  
“You're a liar, not my dad.” Ray replies even quieter.  
The waitress returns with a burger and fries with a beer for Ray’s father and a strawberry smoothie for Ray.  
When the waitress walks away, his father’s eyes trail to her as she walks away, making Ray roll his eyes and start to drink his smoothie.  
Most of their meal is in silence until Ray’s father asks, “Aren’t you going to say thank you to your old man?”  
“Thanks.” Ray says sharply and the rest of the meal is eaten in silence.  
When they finish his father pushes the plate away and burps in Ray’s direction, Ray catching the foul scent of beer, the onions in the burger and the fading scent of cigarettes.   
His face contorts into a look of disgust till the smell fades away.  
“You know, actually, I’m not just here for fun and games. I have something to give to you.” He says.  
Ray looks from his empty plate, his tight face relaxing as he looks to his father.  
“What is it?” He asks.  
His father dig into his pockets and pulls out a bent, coffee stained envelope and puts it on the linoleum table and slides it across to Ray.  
Ray catches it and looks at his father before opening the envelope. He opens it and noticing a plane ticket inside.  
“What is this?” Ray asks.  
His father lets out a sigh before replying, “I want to take you back to New York with me to meet my wife and children. You’re my blood, Ray, and I think you should come home.”  
Ray looks back to his father and asks “Why would I go with you? I don’t care if I’m your son, I just met you.”  
“But you’re my son.” His father points out.  
“I don’t care.” Ray replies, emphasizing on each word and then adding with poison in his tone “Maybe I am, but you’re sure as hell not my dad.”  
“Think about it.” His father says, showing anger at the surface with his stone cold pose, straight and hard.  
“Why do you want me in your damn life?” Ray asks angrily.  
His father replies equally loud, “Because I’m your damn father!”  
“Why now? Why not when my mom died? Or when I was a kid? Why when I have my life coming together? When I have a boyfriend and friends and family? My family may be small, but me and Abuelita love each other no matter what- She’s my family. One that didn’t abandon me!” Ray shouts.  
“Ray, calm down and think this through.” His father says.  
Ray gets up and says, “Just, leave me alone.”   
He walks off and out of the diner, into the darkness of night.  
As he starts to walk away from the diner he hears someone shout, “Ray!”  
Ray replies loudly, not turning around. “What do you want?” Then stops for a moment.  
“It’s Blaine, do you want a drive home?”  
Ray turns around and sees Blaine walking towards him.  
“Are you okay?” He asks, putting a hand on Ray’s shoulder.  
Ray shakes his head and responds, “I just want to go home.” He runs his fingers through his dark hair.  
“I can get my coach to drive you home, it’s late and I wouldn’t want to walk home alone.” Blaine says, patting Ray on the shoulder.  
Ray agrees and Blaine walks back inside and Ray can see him talking to what Ray assumes is his coach.  
The two soon walk out and the coach asks, “Are you Ray?”  
“Yeah.” Ray responds, shivering a bit from the cold light rain.  
The two walk past Ray and to the red van where they get in.  
The coach in the driver’s seat says, “Get in, kid.”  
Ray walk over and gets into the backseat of the van, reminding Ray of Joel’s family’s van, except the smell of rust and gasoline mixed with the useless coverup of air fresher.  
“Where do you live?” The coach asks as he starts up the van.  
“The first intersection after this one, turn left onto the side street.” Ray explains, giving instructions.  
“Alright, kid, get buckled in.” The coach says before driving off.  
Ray buckles himself in and the coach drives off, leaving the diner behind along with Ray’s father. The plane ticket feeling heavy in his pocket.  
-  
When they reach Ray’s home, Ray says thank you and exits the van with a thud of the closing van door.  
They wait in the driveway till Ray gets to the door.  
When Ray’s grandma answers the door she wraps her frail arms around her grandson tightly, crying out happily.  
“Pensé que no ibas a volver a casa!” She cries out.  
“Siempre vengo a casa.” He assures, rubbing her back.  
She ushers him inside, Ray waving to Blaine and his coach before his grandma closes the door.  
When she closes the door, she whispers, loud enough for Ray to hear, “Mi nieto, hijo mío, pensé que iba a perder usted.”  
With every word she says, the plane ticket feels heavier and heavier as if his pockets is getting filled with rocks.  
He doesn’t understand why he still has it in his pocket, he was in such a rush he didn’t put it back on the table. Ray hugs his grandma tightly before going to his room and lying down on his bed.  
The first person Ray calls is Michael.  
His movements seem robotic as he dials Michael’s number, late night sobbing has engraved Michael’s phone number in his head.  
He knows he should call Joel because he is his boyfriend, but Joel doesn’t know the daunting saga of late night sobbing because of his mother’s passing, Michael does.   
By the second ring Michael picks up with a monotone, “Hello.”  
“Michael, fuck.” Ray says weakly.  
“Ray? Ray, what’s wrong?” Michael asks, breaking his monotone voice, becoming more concerned.  
“Remember how a few years ago when I was really upset because of my dad, his name was on my information sheet at the beginning of that year?” Ray asks, holding back tears.  
“Yeah, why?” Michael asks, then adds his voice becoming more angry, “Did someone bring it up? I’ll fucking kill them!”  
“It’s not that, Michael!” Ray cries out, tears starting to streak down his face. There’s silence before Ray continues, “He showed up at my house and took me to dinner then asked something fucking rude and stupid.”  
“What did he ask?” Michael asks, sounding mad.  
“If I wanted to move to New York with him and his family.” Ray sputters out, before wiping his tear stained face.  
“What? Is he fucking stupid as fuck?” Michael shouts.  
“I’m not going with him, though. I’m just upset because once everything settles with my mom he fucking shows up and acts like he didn’t miss out on the last fourteen years.” Ray explains, the tight feeling in his chest feeling tighter.  
“It’s alright, Ray. I promise everything will be okay. I’ll kill that mother fucker.” Michael assures, growling at the end.  
“Thanks, please don’t kill him though, I don’t want you to get arrested.” Ray says, his voice still sounding broken.  
Ray curls up in the bed, the phone still pressed against his ear as he asks himself, “Why did he show up, like what was his motive for this fucking game? He was never around, he never even went to my mother’s funeral, he had to come when I was getting a lot better and break everything down!”  
“I don’t know, Ray. He’s a sick, sick motherfucker, but you know I’m here for you, along with Joel and Lindsay. Also your grandma is there for you, that woman loves you more than she loves her Spanish soaps.” He pauses then says, “I thought that would make you laugh.”  
“You made a point rather than a joke.” Ray comments, rolling onto his back, looking up at the white ceiling, his vision slightly smudged from the tear drops on the glass. He also makes note that Michael doesn’t mention Gavin’s name.  
“I try, do you want to talk to Lindsay? She may have something to add, she’s good that way.” Michael suggests.  
Michael was right, Lindsay was good when it comes to sorting out issues. She has a lot of advice and she wasn’t afraid to put people back in their place if they’re acting out of line. She is sweet and kind, but she’ll also punch you out if you’re being a total jerk.   
“Oh, fuck, Lindsay’s over?” Ray asks, feeling a bit guilty that he called.  
There’s a pause and Ray can hear faintly, “Tell him I’m not here.”  
“She’s not here.” Michael repeats.  
“I can hear her, what are you two doing?” Ray asks, taking off his glasses and wiping them on the blanket.  
There’s a pause, which lets Ray’s mind wander which causes him to go to one scenario that makes Ray say, “Fuck- Are you two having sex?”  
“No, we did before you called.” Michael admits.  
Ray lets out a sigh and says ‘Sorry I called, I didn’t know that you were busy. I’m going to call Joel, I just hope he isn’t having sex.”  
“Sorry about that, Ray.” Michael apologizes.  
“Michael, it’s my fault. I should’ve asked if you were busy.” Ray comments.  
“Alright then. Get some rest Ray.” Michael suggests.  
“Night.” Ray mummbles.  
“Good night, Ray. Text me if anything happens, okay?” Michael asks.  
“Okay.” Ray agrees then soon hangs up the phone then calls up Joel.  
Instead of ‘hello’ Joel says, “Are you alright?”  
“Better, I called Michael. I can’t believe he came.” Ray groans, rubbing his face.  
“Alright, that’s good.” Joel replies, sounding somewhat relieved.   
Ray lets out a sigh before saying, “He wants me to live with him.”  
‘Who does?” Joel asks, sounding angry and confused.  
“My dad, Joel. My dad wants me to move to New York with him. Why did he do this to me? Why did he have to come now?” Ray replies.  
“What? He wants you to go to New York?” Joel asks, sounding slightly outraged.  
“Yeah, I’m not going though. there’s no question in that, I’m mostly just offended that he fucking showed up. Why did he do that?” Ray explains, letting out a sigh.  
“I don’t know Ray, I just don’t know.” Joel responds, his tone calming.  
-  
When Ray wakes up the next morning, he feels in a way better. Him and Joel stayed up until Ray eventually fell asleep at around three in the morning. Ray explained what happened and why he was upset about his father all of a sudden coming into his life and how this drastic shift made him sad and angry.  
Joel’s words felt warm and helpful, promises that tomorrow will be better and reminding the other teen that tomorrow is their big date.  
Ray got his mind off of the topic of his dad by helping Joel pick which movie they wanted the see the following day, then soon went back to talking. He also found out more about Joel and what he was like when he was younger and how he knows what Ray’s going through because he too had an absent father too, although Joel’s father was dead, so Joel wasn’t bitter, only lonely with the idea of not really knowing his own father.  
Ray makes his way into the kitchen, realizing that he didn’t change out of his clothes from last night aside from his sweatshirt that is laying on the floor of his room.  
When he enters the kitchen he finds his grandma in there and the plane ticket ripped in half on the kitchen table, the envelope no where to be found.  
“La Abuela?.” He asks, inching closer to her.  
She turns away from the sink, wiping her hands on a dish towel near by as she responds “Sí, Ray?.”  
“¿Por qué es este boleto aquí? ¿Por qué se rasgó por la mitad?” Ray asks, pointing to the plane ticket.  
She lets out a sigh and goes over to her grandson and wraps her arms around him. She lets out a stifled sob into her grandson’s shoulder.  
“La Abuela?” Ray repeats.  
She lifts her head and wipes away her tears before she spoke, “Please… Ray, that man… bad… do not... leave, no, please...”  
Ray shakes his head and replies immediately, “Yo no voy a ninguna parte, la Abuela.” He kisses her cheek before she lets go of Ray. “Te quiero”  
“Te quiero, también” She nods and places a hand on his cheek before saying, “No quiero que te vayas todavía, eres exactamente igual que tu madre y yo no quiero que cometas el mismo error que ella hizo.”  
Ray nods and gives her a quick hug, once again assuring her that he is not going anywhere and he’s still staying home. He soon makes breakfast for the both of them then afterwards gets ready for school, feeling exhausted yet happy; exhausted because of his late night conversation and what happened with his father but, happy because of his date with Joel tonight and that Joel will let him draw him at the diner, which Joel promised last night.  
Once at the school he sees Blaine out on the field with the rest of his team, but his girlfriend is off to the side, not JJ.  
As he walks closer to the school, he passes the Pit and JJ notices him, distracting him from his icy gaze towards Blaine as a cigarette hangs from his mouth, prompting JJ to yell. “Hey, Ray!”  
Ray looks over and waves at the other teen, JJ gestures for Ray to come over to him.  
JJ stamps out his cigarette as Ray approaches then says, “How’s it going?”  
“I'm good.” Ray lies.  
JJ’s eyes narrow and he says, “Don’t lie to me, kid. Blaine over there told me everything when we met up this morning.”  
“What time did you guys meet up?” Ray asks, trying to deflect from the problem at hand.  
JJ instantly picks up on what Ray’s doing and responds, “Don’t get me distracted. The answer is early, too early, and a lot of climbing was involved.”   
Ray bites back the urge to tell JJ who he saw Blaine with last night, but part of his assures him that JJ knows because JJ knows everything, except how to neutralize chemical reactions.  
“What did he tell you?” Ray asks sheepishly.  
“That your father walks into your life unannounced and unwanted, then asks if you want to fly away and live with him as if nothing happened.” JJ replies then puts an arm over Ray’s shoulder and adding, “Are you going with him?”  
“Of course not!” Ray exclaims.  
“Good, that fucker is not worth it, fucking trust me.” JJ agress.  
JJ’s eyes linger to where Blaine is and sees that the athlete is waving to him.   
JJ says to Ray, “That’s for me.” before letting go of the younger teen and walking off, the sound of the other people in the Pit hollering as JJ walks towards Blaine  
Ray walks away to the school and sees Blaine and JJ inbetween two of the portables making out. Ray was glad for was that he and Joel didn’t have to hide their relationship because they are surrounded by people that support their relationship and are happy for them.  
Speaking of Joel, once Ray gets inside the older teen calls him and explains that he’s going to be a bit late because according to Geoff, “Burnie broke the fucking van.” so now they are walking to school. Ray can barely hear what Joel is saying because Geoff and Burnie are arguing loudly in the background.  
After Joel hangs up saying that he, “needs to break up a fight”, Ray goes to his locker and sits by it texting away with Michael and Gavin.  
Michael apologizing for giving Ray a mental image last night and Gavin says that he doesn’t think that him and Ryan will work out and that he might be interested in Dan, the exchange student, and doesn't know how to break the news to Ryan.  
He drifts off for a while in the empty halls, his mind still working overtime to think through everything but, his expression looks calm with his eyes shut and his his lips in a soft line.  
He stays like that until he hears someone say, “Hey Ray.”  
Ray’s eyes flutter open and he sees Joel.  
“Oh, hey.” Ray smiles.  
Joel crouches down and wraps his arms around Ray and asks, “Are you feeling better?”  
Ray nods against Joel’s shoulder and Joel presses a kiss against the side of Ray’s face, against his warm cheek.  
“I hope he just screws off.” Ray replies.  
“He will, don’t worry. I’ll make sure that he doesn’t hurt you anymore, I’ll do anything.” Joel says before letting go of Ray and sitting beside him.  
“Please don’t get into another fight.” Ray comments, putting his head on Joel’s hoodie covered shoulder.  
“I can’t let him ruin your life.” Joel says, looking to Ray.  
‘I know, just try not to fight him. You’ll get in trouble again.” Ray replies, hugging Joel and replying, “I don’t want you to get in trouble.”  
Joel nods in agreement before Ray let’s go of him, his head still resting against the older teen’s shoulder.  
Ray hopes that tonight doesn’t get ruined by his father, that he’ll just leave him alone and never come back or at least not come back until Ray moves out.  
The whole day goes by in a blur, every minute feeling like an hour as Ray inches towards the end of the day so he can get ready for his date tonight with Joel and the dinner with JJ and Blaine.   
Gavin texts him half way through lunch saying that he skipped his second period class to talk to Ryan and to tell Joel that Ryan is a bit sensitive right now. Gavin does feel bad but, there was no point in lying to Ryan to only keep the relationship going, Ryan said that he understood and that he’d be more upset if Gavin was lying to him and actually thanked him before walking back to his class, Gavin said that he heard crying as Ryan walked down the hall as he watched.  
Ray told gavin that everything was going to be okay and that Ryan will recover. He soon tells Joel and Joel says he’ll try his best to help Ryan.  
Even with that drama Ray tried his best not to run out of his last period classroom and run home in order to get ready for that night.  
He stands in front of the mirror shirtless, with a pair of jeans relaxed around his waist, needing a belt to stay where they are supposed to. Just got out the shower a ten minutes prior, his hair is still sticking to his forehead and water droplets covering his face.  
He dries off his hair more before leaving the bathroom and turning the light off. He enters his bedroom down the hall a bit.  
He gets changed, trying out different shirts and hoodies. The feeling of now having the “right outfit” feeling foreign to the teen because he’d never had the feeling. He always threw whatever on or had a uniform to wear but, tonight was different. Tonight, after everything the two have been through he wants to look noice for his date, Joel.   
His boyfriend, Joel.  
The thought makes Ray smile yet irritated because no shirt seemed right to him.  
As he tries to find the right outfit his phone goes off, ignoring it in favour of changing once more, his phone rings again, signalling a phone call. The vibrations more rapid making a buzzing noise on his bed.  
With a shirt half on he goes over to his bed, seeing that Lindsay is calling him.  
Concerned, he picks up and asks, “Hello?”  
“Oh, hey, Ray. Um, how do I explain this in the best possible light?” She asks.  
“What happened?” Ray asks, trying to pull his shirt fully on with one hand.  
She lets out a sigh before saying “I think Michael and Gavin are either going to beat the hell out of each other or make up. Can you please come here?”  
“Yeah, sure. I’ll be there soon.” Ray says, stumbling around his room trying to find his belt.  
“Thank you so much, we’re across the street from the plaza in the grocery store parking lot.” She says before hanging up.  
Ray puts his phone in his pocket then finds his belt, putting it on as he rushes into the living room to get his shoes on.  
“Me voy temprano, estoy viendo Gavin y Michael primero, algo ocurrió.” Ray quickly explains before leaving the house, hoodie and wallet in hand.  
He grabs his bike from the backyard and pedals off down the street as fast as he can in order to stop a possible fight.  
While waiting at the stop light, anxious because the light hasn’t changed yet. He texts Joel “I’m heading to the diner now, no need to pick me up, Gavin and Michael are either having a fight or making up.”  
When the stop light changes Ray speeds across the paved road and down the next street.  
He soon gets the parking lot to see Lindsay in the way between Gavin and Michael, a look of fear on her face, ready for the two boys to start fighting.  
“Oh fuck.” Ray says to himself before he speeds down to the grocery store and gets off his bike, resting it against the building and sprinting in the empty parking lot.  
“Guys, what the fuck!” Ray shouts, moving in between the two boys, hooing if a fight breaks out he can help Lindsay.  
“Oh, hey, Ray.” Michael says.  
“What are you two doing?” Ray asks, looking from Michael to Gavin.  
The two look at each other before Gavin replies, “We were going to make up but, I said something to Michael.”  
“He called me a mingy little prick.” Michael pipes up.  
Ray looks to Lindsay for confirmation and she nods in agreement, looking a bit more at ease because her boyfriend and his former best friend aren’t going to beat each other up.  
“Sorry about that, my boy.” Gavin apologizes, using a pet name hoping that Michael will accept his apology.  
“I haven’t heard that in a while.” Michael points out.  
“I tried, accent and everything.” Lindsay comments.  
It makes them laugh a bit before Ray asks, “Why are you making up now? You guys were both really angry.”  
“Your dad just walks into your life, right now you need friends, not two idiots fighting over some stupid kiss.” Lindsay replies.  
“You knew about the kiss?” Ray asks.  
“I did, drunk Michael can’t keep his mouth closed.” Lindsay responds  
Lindsay shrugs “I was a bit upset but, I was more upset by these two not being friends anymore.”  
“You know, I love you, Linds.” Michael coos.  
“Idiot.” She mumbles, flicking his nose.  
He leans in a kisses her on the cheek and she nudges him in the ribs.  
Michael looks to to Gavin and apologizes “I’m really sorry Gav, let’s not drink and make out anymore.”  
Gavin nods and Michael adds “I can’t go out with you but, I’m pretty sure that any other Lad would be really happy to go out with you.”  
“there may be a Lad, he’s an exchange student named Dan.”  
“Dan the man.” Michael chuckles.  
“I’m glad we’re okay, Mi-cool.” Gavin chuckles, using Michael’s most ridiculous nickname.  
Michael gives him a look before saying, “Today I won’t punch you out.”  
Lindsay chuckles and says “Please don’t get get into another fight.” Then kisses Michael on the cheek.  
“Are you and Joel going to come to the school play at A.H tomorrow?” Michael asks.  
“I don’t know, I think Joel might be tired of dates after tonight, this is second in the span of two days.” Ray responds chuckling.  
“Are you two going to bang?” Michael asks, winking at Ray.  
Ray’s face goes red and he says “No... No… Well, not yet.”  
“I’m just messing with you, Ray.” Michael chuckles.  
“Like you’re a virgin saint.” Ray comments sarcastically.  
Gavin shrugs, “You possibly won’t be after tonight.”  
They both start to laugh, Lindsay following in laughter which causes Ray to laugh as well.  
Ray starts to think about how the night will end with him and Joel and he hopes that it’ll be another date or something more.  
They leave a little while later, Michael and Lindsay saying that they're going to play video games at Michael’s house and even invites Gavin to tag along. Gavin offers to take Ray’s bike home which Ray agrees and thanks the other teen.  
As Ray watches them leave, standing by the grocery store he gets a text from JJ saying that they’re on their way to the diner.  
Ray quickly texts Joel saying, “Turns out they were making up, JJ and Blaine are on their way.”  
Joel texts back saying, “That rhymes.” Which makes Ray chuckle.  
He crosses the street to the diner and rests against the corner of the wall, looking up at the fading sky.  
The sun is dipping in the horizon, spreading shades of orange, purple and pink as it descends, showing the end of a long day.  
Within a few minutes of Ray enjoying the end of the day, he sees a black car pull up by him which makes him move back until he notices the door opening and Joel getting out.  
Joel waves to Matt, who’s in the the drivers seat before the older man drives off.  
“Nice car.” Ray comments, looking to the older teen.  
“Yeah, too bad it’s only for Matt’s use.” Joel shrugs.  
They both go into the diner to escape the new found chill as night take over at the end of February.  
When they get inside Ray takes off his sweatshirt, revealing his shirt underneath. One look at it makes Joel break into a grin and say, “I didn’t know we were dressing up tonight.”  
Ray looks down at his shirt and sees that he is wearing his tuxedo shirt.  
He had been in a hurry and this was the shirt that he had on when Lindsay called him about Gavin and Michael.  
“Well, I like to look formal on dates.” Ray chuckles, trying to play it cool.  
Joel rolls his eyes and are soon seated, thankfully across the diner from where Ray sat the previous night.  
The diner looks nicer than it did the previous night, maybe due to Ray’s vision not being clouded by anger. It’s one of those diners that replicates something from the 50s to make the older part of the community reminisce about their youth.  
Joel’s seated across from Ray in the booth with a smile on his face.  
“You look nice. Did you shave?” Ray asks.  
“Yeah, so I don’t scratch up his face.” Joel responds with a chuckle.  
Everything feels so simple and carefree, playing footsies with Joel as they wait for Blaine and JJ. In that moment the words, “I love you” never felt more perfect.  
“I love you.” Ray says, the words slipping out of his lips.  
Joel relaxes in his seat and replies, “I can never get over how you say those words.”  
“I guess that’s your way of saying ‘I love you, too.’” Ray comments, chuckling.  
He knows that Joel feels the same way, he’s heard Joel say those words before and even with his other choice of words it still makes Ray’s chest flutter.  
“Maybe.” Joel replies, smiling.  
He leans across the table and Ray meets him halfway to kiss the twelfth grader on the lips. His lips feels soft and his hair feels soft and thick as Ray runs his fingers through it.  
When they hear someone clear their throat near them, they instantly part, both blushing from embarrassment and the kiss.  
Ray looks over to see JJ and Blaine standing there, JJ with a smirk on his face.  
“Oh, hey.” Ray says, his face covered in red.  
“Stop sucking face and move over.” JJ says jokingly, gesturing for the other two teens to move over.  
They do so, and the bad boy and athlete sit down across from each other; JJ beside Joel and Blaine beside Ray.  
“I just want to say thanks for letting us sort of join your date. It’s hard to go out without fear of being exposed. Thank-you.” Blaine begins quietly, looking to Ray and Joel.  
“It’s no problem, it’s hard and it’ll take time before you’re comfortable.” Joel assures, his voice also quiet.  
“Thanks, man.” Blaine nods, smiling at Joel.  
They order their food soon after; Joel and JJ order a bacon cheeseburger, Blaine a classic cheeseburger with a salad because his coach is getting all mad at the team for not eating enough vegetables, and Ray gets chicken strips with fries.  
They continue to talk until their food arrives.  
The street lights gleam in through the diner’s large windows, the sun is finally at ease and reading under the darkness of night.  
They sit and eat, enjoying themselves as patrons come in and out of the diner.  
Blaine at one point during their meal asks how to “properly” kiss a boy because he feels like he’s a shitty kisser, in which JJ agrees jokingly.   
Blaine says that kissing JJ is different then kissing his girlfriend.  
The name of Blaine's girlfriend makes JJ uncomfortable, but Ray easily defuses the situation by joking that he’d show Blaine how to kiss which ended with JJ throwing a slice of tomato from his burger at Ray, smacking the teen square on the left side of his glasses, smearing the glass with grease and tomato juice.   
“Aw, fuck.” Ray groans, taking off his glasses and cleaning them off with his napkin.  
“Don’t be mooching on our prize football player.” JJ teases, leaning across and putting his hand over Ray’s shoulder.  
Ray looks up from his glasses, and does his best to make out JJ before saying, “You prick.” Before making sure that his glasses are clean.  
“There was no need for that, JJ.” Joel comments, looking at the bad boy.  
“Sorry, Joel, I meant to hit his fancy shirt anyway.” JJ responds.  
Joel has a feeling that JJ is a bit scared of the twelfth grader.  
“Don’t make fun of my shirt.” Ray defends.  
“I’m not making fun of it, I like it.” JJ responds, holding his hands in front of him in defense.  
“I’ll be right back.” Blaine says, before getting up and walking towards the washrooms.  
JJ soon adds “Same here. Here Joel, can you put this into the parking meter outside, you look like you have a license.” then hands Joel ten dollars and walks off, away from the booth.  
“Thanks... I guess.” I’ll be right back.” Joel says before leaning across the table and kissing Ray on the cheek before getting up and going outside.  
Ray sits there alone, looking at Joel through the large window, making sure the older teen is okay.  
He hears someone say, “Hey.”  
Ray looks over to see a girl standing by the table, not dressed like a waitress but, in a uniform from the school across the city, Ray doesn’t remember if it started with an R or a B, either way there mascot was a Spartan. She has blonde hair and sounds like she’s from Britain, maybe Gavin would know her but it seems unlikely and would probably make him go on a rant about how “he doesn’t know everyone in England.”   
“Oh, hi.” Ray says, confused as to why this girl is here.  
Before his mind could swirl with scenarios she asks “Are you with that guy out there?”  
“Yeah, he’s filling up the meter.” Ray replies, jerking his thumb to Joel who is outside.  
Ray gets quick look at him, seeing that he is having trouble with the meter.  
“Oh, my friend and I wanted to know if you were on a date because we think you’re both cute together.” She says, smiling and getting red in the cheeks.  
“Well, thanks.” Ray smiles, feeling flattered by the girl and her friend’s compliments “I’ll tell the idiot outside what you said.”  
“My friend’s over there.” The girl says pointing to her friend, who is at another booth. With brown hair, she looks to her friend and Ray and waves.  
When the girl looks back to Ray, her face turns into a look of horror as something outside catches her eye.  
Ray looks outside as well and horror crosses his face too, his eyes see Joel getting beat up by a man clad in black, his fist taking a swift punch at Joel’s face.  
The memories of their first meeting flood into Ray’s mind as he quickly gets up and passes the girl, muttering an apology as he runs out of the diner to his boyfriend.  
“Joel!” Ray shouts, terror straining his voice.  
His feet hit the concrete as he runs to his boyfriend.  
“Get away from him!” Ray shouts as he tries to by the attacker off of Joel.  
Ray throws punches at the attacker’s back, yelling profanity as the attacker pins Joel down to the concrete.  
The attacker moves and smacks Ray away before pinning the younger boy to the ground. Ray thrashes around, trying to get out of his attacker’s grip. When he catches a glimpse of the man under the hood he stops, his eyes growing wide at the man holding him down. It’s his father.  
Before Ray could have any time to react a fist collides with the side of Ray’s face, causing him to yell in pain. His father pulls out a pocket knife from his back pocket and holds it to Ray’s neck.  
“Now you’re coming to New York with me.” His father growls, reeking is whiskey, the scent burning in Ray’s nostrils.  
Joel slowly gets up, wiping the blood away from his nose before staggering towards Ray’s dad and yells “Get away from him you fuck!”  
Joel tears Ray’s father away from Ray then punches Ray’s father in the face, all of the anger coming out in Joel with one swift punch in the jaw.  
This causes the older man to reel back in pain but soon going back on top of Ray, except with less force on the teen, his grip still deadly on Ray’s wrist, causing it to crunch. Making Ray scream in pain and thrash around, pain shooting from his forearm to the rest of his body.  
The older man pulls out a knife, holding it close to the side of Ray’s neck. Ray quickly kicks the man in the crotch, yelling profanity as his father falls off of his, slicing the knife across Ray’s left collar bone. Joel rushes over to Ray, seeing the other teen’s face slick with tears, flowing as rapid as the blood oozing from his collarbone. The tears on Ray’s face brings feelings of their first meeting to Joel’s mind.  
He tugs his shirt off,a simple white t-shirt and holds it to Ray’s injury as he whispers “Ray.”  
Ray;s father tries to go after them again but Blaine and another patron come out and restrain the man, the thrashes wildly in their grip.  
“Don’t ruin your shirt. I like that shirt.” Ray says, sounding weak.  
“I can get another white shirt like a Wal-mart, I can’t get another you, I can’t get you at Wal-mart, so let me hold it to you cut.” Joel points out.  
That makes Ray chuckle a little bit, which makes Joel smile a bit through the tears.  
Joel adds pressure to the shirt which makes Ray hiss in pain and squirm a bit.  
“Shh, shh, it’s okay. It’ll feel better soon, I don’t want you to bleed out.” Joel assures, using his other hand to rub Ray’s forehead, trying to soothe the other teen.  
“Then don’t cry, I’m not going to die. I can hear the sirens already.” Ray assures, trying to reach up and wipe Joel’s face but, makes him hiss in pain and quickly lower his arm.  
The ambulance soon comes, and the paramedics soon swarm Ray causing Joel to move back.  
JJ goes up to Joel and tells him to with Ray and him and Blaine will deal with the cops. Joel says thanks to JJ before going into the ambulance with Ray.  
Joel numbly watches the paramedics work on Ray, his good hand holding Joel’s own, as he looks at the teen.  
He snaps back to reality when one of the paramedics asks “Are you hurt?”  
Joel shakes his head and says “Just a punch in the face, it doesn’t hurt that bad.”  
“It’s bruising, I can take a quick look at it.” The paramedics suggests.  
“I’m fine, I have to make sure Ray is okay.” Joel says.  
“He’ll be fine, the cut didn’t hit any major organs but it deep enough near the end for stitches. Also his forearm may be broken by the way that when we try to touch Mr. Narvaez’s arm he flinches.” The paramedic explains.  
Before Joel could say anything else Ray pipes up saying “Joel, let him check you out.. Not that way.” Ray says, softly smiling at the end.  
“If you’d rather have a doctor check on it, we’ll be at the hospital soon, like a few minutes.” The driver comments.  
The ride, to Joel, feels much longer than a few minutes. Which with every second Joel’s tears push more and more, and it makes Joel feel like crying the ambulance.  
Once at the hospital Joel waits outside the room, a nurse soon comes to him and checks out his wounds, coming to the conclusion that it’ll just bruise before going off to help who else, not before asking him to ait in the waiting room at the end of the hall, with more questions than answers.  
The nurse didn’t ask any questions and wore a very bored expression, as the nurse walks away Joel misses Mrs. Wilson and how she was very kind is.  
JJ and Blaine soon come to the waiting room followed by Ray’s grandma who is hysterical, crying for her grandson that is in rooms down the hall, and screaming profanity at her former son-in-law even though he is no where to be found. JJ and Joel manage to calm her down and give her a seat to sit down and calm down.  
Geoff, Burnie and Matt come fifteen minutes after Joel goes to a pay phone and calls them to come down then proceeded to explain what happened. Matt carries in sandwiches he made, mostly for Ray’s grandma because ‘She might be hungry” and a shirt for Joel, which Joel later found out while putting it on that it was one of Geoff’s shirt and it was a bit too tight on him.  
Everyone sits around the waiting room, it’s quiet for the most part for the exception of the PA system. The news of Ray’s injuries are an unspoken topic but, for Joel, JJ and Blaine guilt strikes them. Guilty about how there could’ve been something that could’ve prevented this.  
After eating one of the sandwiches Ray’s grandma stands up and says with worry in her voice “Tengo que encontrar a mi nieto.”  
JJ perks up, waking up from his sleepy trance, realizing that Spanish has been spoken and has translated it as best as he can.  
He responds in half-ass, shitty Spanish “No, él saldrá pronto.”  
She looks at him with confusion and asks “¿Cómo lo sabes?”  
JJ doesn’t know how to respond so he reaches across and puts a hand on her elbow, giving her a look of reassurance.  
She soon sits back down, her expression changing from worry to pain. Pain over her grandson’s pain, pain that her grandson got attacked by the man he should’ve called “dad”. She starts to think of her daughter, pulling out a picture of the woman that is in her wallet and thinks what would she do in this situation.  
As time wears on with the small ‘tick’ of the clock. JJ rests his head on Blaine's shoulder as they drift to sleep, Geoff rubs Joel’s back as a way to comfort the other teen as he holds Ray’s grandma’s hand. Seconds turn to minutes and minutes turn into two hours before a doctor comes out, looking for Ray’s grandma and Joel.  
A doctor wearing a large white lab coat with a clipboard in hand.  
Gus notices the doctor first and cheers “Doc!”  
“médico?” Ray asks, looking up to the man in the lab coat.  
“May I speak with a family member or who was at the site?” The doctor asks.  
Both Joel and Ray’s grandma stand up when the doctor finishes his question.  
“I only need one.” The doctor says.  
Ray’s grandma looks to Joel as a way to tell him to go instead of her, Joel assumes it's because Ray’s grandma would have a hard time understanding what the doctor is saying.  
Joel walks to the doctor and the doctor leads him down the hall.  
This hospital is different than the one that Geoff was in, this hospital seemed more bleak, sickly people by themselves in wheelchairs, nurses idly doing whatever they are doing, this hospital didn’t look or seem as nice as the one that Geoff was at.  
The doctor leads Joel into a room, Joel slowly enters and sees Ray is in a bed with wires hooked up to him, monitoring his heart beat.  
Ray is flipping through a torn magazine that has seen better days. A bandage on his cheek and below his collarbone, where Joel clearly remembers seeing blood coming out of.  
The doctor ushers Joel further inside.  
“Hey.” Ray says lazily “They gave me the best thing ever.” slurring out the word “ever”.  
This makes Joel laugh a little bit, before starting to cry again. Joy filling his chest, flushing out all the sadness and pain that has been filling him up for the last little while, making his stomach clench, and nausea making him feeling heavy and gross.  
Joel goes to Ray’s bedside, wiping his face with his bare arm.  
“You look ridiculous.” Ray chuckles. He feels light and filled with warmth, but he also feels numb, hiding the true pain that crosses his face, collarbone and arm.  
“Shut up, Ray. I thought I lost you tonight.” Joel blubbers, having to wipe his face again.  
“You won’t. Since you’re older, you might die first.” Ray says, sounding like a child.  
That makes Joel smile a bit as he says “If you weren’t high on morphine and there was a doctor behind me, I would either hit you or tickle the fuck out of you.”  
“You could do something else that has the word fuck in it.” Ray grins.  
The doctor comes over and says, “Mr. Narvaez will be out by the morning, no major organs were harmed but, his forearm is fractured. The police will talk to you, Ray and Mr. Gibson at a later date.”   
Joel nods, confused by the name “Mr. Gibson” until Ray says “Mr. Gibson is Blaine, i thought he'd have a cooler nickname but, it’s just Gibson.”  
Joel looks to Ray and chuckles bit before saying “Maybe I like you on morphine.”  
Ray’s grin grows wider and he says “I have to tell you something.”  
“Do you want to stay with Mr. Narvaez for a while?” The doctor asks “He is in risk as side from the side effects of the morphine as you see right now.”  
“Yeah, sure.” Joel replies, slightly stuttering  
The doctor nods before exiting the room, leaving the two teens alone.  
“What did you want to ask me?” Joel asks as he brings a chair over to the side of the bed.  
Before Ray could reply, Joel kisses him on the forehead, rubbing his cheek.  
“I was going to ask if you wanted to go to that Spring dance with me on Friday? To make up for this shitty date.” Ray asks, moving his cast covered arm up.  
“You find really bad times to ask things.” Joel chuckles.  
“Hey… This is the first time.” Ray says, sticking out his tongue.  
Joel chuckles, and puts a hand over Ray’s cast.  
“Is that a yes then, because I don’t want to change plans. I won’t remember them.” Ray comments, yawning a bit.  
“It’s a yes, Ray.” Joel smiles, leaning in and kissing Ray on the forehead.  
Ray chuckles like a little kid and says “I knew you would say that.”  
Joel looks from the cast to Ray and chuckles “Yeah, I bet you did know all along.”


	9. All Things Draw To a Close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off I want to say thank you to everyone who supported me through this, everyone who game me feedback or helped me write this, even people who are reading this; thank you. This fic got me through a really rough time, when my grandma was in the hospital. Everyone who supported me over that month, I owe you all everything. This story was my way of keeping my mind off the constant worry of my grandma's health, my plummeting grades, and all the other things that were going on in my life at the time I started writing this. Even though I didn't post frequently every week sometimes, when I did post them I got great feedback, and I want tot hank everyone for that. This story means a lot to me and I feel bad that it's ending but, it's had a good run and who knows maybe I'll come back to it and do little side chapters of ideas that wouldn't really fit in the his story line. Looking After This Little Fish is the biggest project I've ever completed and it gives me hope that I can do more multi-chapter fics and complete them. Thank to everyone's support and a special thanks to Screaming Pies for editing and i-cant-always-love-you for great and honest feedback, and also the the anons that said that I broke them, thank you. I hope you all enjoy this finale chapter and I'll see you in the next story <3

The next afternoon Matt offers to drive Ray home from the hospital because Ray’s grandma is unable to drive. Ray’s grandma bakes Matt a pie as a way to say thanks, which Matt texted Joel about, rubbing it in his face. Ray also texts Joel throughout the morning, apologizing for getting his shirt covered in the younger teen’s blood, Joel assures Ray that everything is okay and that everything is okay and not too get stressed over a stupid shirt. Which Ray replied it was a very nice shirt while makes the twelfth grader laugh a little bit while sitting in first period.  
The teen spent the whole school day with high anxiety about Ray and him being injured. Last night still playing in his mind as he wanders from class to class. That’s until Drama, Ryan quickly picks up on Joel’s absent mind which prompts him to ask ‘What’s wrong?”  
Joel snapping back to reality for the first time since class started replies “Yeah, just some stuff going on.”  
“Guess it leaves you kind of stuffed.” Barbara says, nudging Joel in hopes of a laugh.  
Joel smiles a bit, nudging her back and responds “Not really, Ray was in the hospital last night and he must be home by now and I’m worried about him.”  
Jack leans across their small circle and places a hand on Joel’s knee then says “I’m so sorry. What happened? If you don’t mind me asking.”  
“We got attacked outside the diner, down the road a bit. It was motivated, we don’t know when the court date is and all that junk, I really haven’t been paying attention.” Then lets out a yawn before continuing “As you can see, I haven’t got a lot of sleep last night. Last night keeps running through my head like I’m on some kind of nightmare treadmill. I know he’s okay now but, I feel like I’m the one who should in his spot right now.”  
“You’re almost home, just lunch and one more class.” Ryan assures, patting Joel on the back, comforting.  
“Thanks.” Joel replies with a small smile, he’s been given hope to make it to the end of the day.   
“Let’s get back to practice.” Jack says, before pointing to his script.  
Everyone nods in agreement and they start once again memorizing their lines, Joel seeming back to earth and alert now.  
At the end of class as Joel is putting on his sneakers again Ryan comes up to him. The two of them the two left in the class, aside from the teacher.  
“Hey Joel.” Ryan says.  
Joel looks to Ryan and asks as he ties his shoelaces “Yeah?”  
“Do..Do you talk to Gavin?” Ryan asks a bit nervously.  
“Not really.. I haven’t seen him since the party. I think only Ray saw him once.” Joel replies, scratching the back of his neck.  
“Oh, I just wanted to give him a message but, nevermind.” Ryan comments, shrugging.  
‘What were you going to say?” Joel asks, stuffing his hands in his pockets.  
Ryan looks at his sock clad feet before responding “Thank you.”  
“That’s it?” Joel asks.  
Ryan nods before explaining “I’d say thank you because Gavin showed me that its okay to love even if it doesn’t last forever, that there are guys out there who would want to be with me, and who knows maybe I’ll end up someone completely different than Gavin. That kid showed me that relationships flourish and some will die, and that it’s okay to party and have a good time. He taught me a lot in the time that we were together and i just hope that he’s happy now.”  
Joel could hug Ryan right now but, decides on patting him on the shoulder and says “Don’t worry, you’ll be happy.”  
“Thanks.” Ryan simply says before walking off, out of the class and into the hallway full of people.  
Joel soon follows in suite, trying to remember every word that Ryan said because maybe it would give Gavin some relief if there was any worry.  
When the school day ends Joel is instantly out of his seat and running out of the front school door, making sure that nothing happens to the Spring dance tickets he bought during lunch. He makes sure the tickets are still in his huge uniform pant pocket and holds onto a wish that his formal dress shirt still fits him.  
It isn’t a major formal event but, he wanted to look nice for Ray because he dressed up for their first date even though he didn’t mean too.  
He soon arrives to Ray’s home from the school and quickly knocks on the door.  
His grandma opens the door and quickly hugs the teen, kissing him on both cheeks and muttering things in Spanish that Joel can’t understand but, he thinks that they are all nice things. It’s a much different reaction than a little while ago but, Joel wasn’t complaining about it; Joel assumes that is past is behind them now because he “saved” Ray again. It feels like Ray is the one who saved Joel, not the other way around, Joel feels like Ray deserves the praises and kisses more than Joel especially since his injuries are severe.  
Ray’s grandma lets Joel inside the house. Joel takes off his shoes and sees Ray on the couch with a taco on a pate that is resting on his chest, looking at it lazily. His cast covered arm is resting on the low coffee table.  
“Hey.” Joel says, walking towards his boyfriend.  
Ray looks from the plate to Joel and a smile grows on his face when he sees Joel.  
“Hey.” Ray replies, smiling back to Joel.  
Grandma walks over and says “Ray, voy a estar de vuelta a la derecha, mi amigo y yo vamos de compras.” Before grabbing her purse from the dining room table and walking back to the door.  
“Adiós, Abuela, ser a salvo.” Ray replies, waving to his grandma.  
She walks over from the door and hugs her grandson before leaving the house, closing the door behind her.  
When she closes the second door that leads into the front stairs, Ray speaks up, “Lock the door.” He gestures to the door with his good arm.  
Joel looks confused for a moment and Ray simply winks at him as he puts the plate onto the table.  
“What are you thinking, Ray?” Joel asks, smirk tugging at the edges of his mouth, locking the door and looking to the younger teen.  
Ray slowly gets up and says “I was thinking that we can be a little bit, closer.”  
“What about your arm?” Joel asks, moving away from the door and closer to Ray.  
The younger teen smiles and suggests, “Let me be on top”, kissing Joel on the lips.  
“I thought I was going to die yesterday.” Ray mumbles against Joel’s lips.  
“You're here though, coming back stronger.” Joel says back softly.  
Ray parts the kiss and says, looking at Joel with puppy dog eyes “That’s why I want this because I almost died last night, I want to feel you and suck my dick.”  
“That sounded really poetic.” Joel chuckles, his tone turning serious for a moment. “But, Ray, I don’t want you to have sex with me because you feel like you may die any moment.”  
“I really want this, Joel. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, I was just embarrassed by it.” Ray admits.  
That makes Joel smile and lean in a place a small kiss on Ray’s cheek. “Lead the way.”  
Ray takes Joel’s hand with his good one and leads him to Ray’s bedroom, once inside the room and they are close to the bed, Ray nudges Joel to lie down on it. When Joel lies down Ray slides ontop Joel and starts to make out with the older teen, his kisses aggressive and Joel’s bottom lip keeps getting caught in Ray’s teeth, which makes him whine.  
When Ray pulls away, Joel’s breathless and grinning. “Wow, just wow.”  
“I can say likewise.” Ray chuckles before getting off the bed and crouching to see under it.  
He grabs a small bottle of lube from under there along with an unopened box of condoms and tosses them on the bed beside Joel.  
“Where did you got that?” Joel asks as he takes off his white uniform shirt and tosses it onto the floor.  
Ray slowly gets up and sees Joel shirtless which makes his mouth dry and open wide.  
“What’s wrong?” Joel asks, looking to Ray.  
“Noth… Nothing’s wrong, everything is alright.” Ray replies, growing red in the face.  
Joel chuckles and places his arms in his lap, leaning forward for a kiss, Ray leans down and kisses Joel on the on the lips.  
“Can I do something?” Ray asks, running his fingers through Joel’s dark hair.  
Joel nods in agreement and Ray explains “Sit up straight so I can see all of your back.”  
The other teen straightens his back while Ray walks around to the other side of the bed and crawls up behind Joel.  
In the afternoon sunlight shining into Ray’s room, bouncing against the white walls, Ray can see scars lining Joel’s back.  
“What are there?” Ray asks as he run his fingers along Joel’s back as he rests his head against the back of Joel’s shoulder.  
“Really bad ideas.” Joel replies, looking behind him and feeling a bit skittish because of Ray’s light fingers trailing along his bare skin.  
Ray shifts back a bit so he can see the scars once again and sees a deep one, different than the other ones. The other ones are white lines across his skin but this one was deep and a swift line that gets less and less deep till it ends. It’s placement is from just under Joel’s shoulder to about halfway down his ribs.  
“What about this one?” Ray asks about it, tracing his finger across it again.  
“RWBY Correctional School, I went there during the summer because I failed math, it’s like across town and it sucked getting there. I got into a fist fight on school property; I got booted from a correctional school. Surprised C.B academy even took me in. ” Joel responds, looking behind him once more and seeing Ray examining more scars.  
“Then what happened?” ray asks because the scar is too deep for a fist and it wouldn’t look like that.  
“I got stabbed, like you. I was in the hospital for two days because it was really deep.” Joel replies, looking back to the door of the room.  
Ray gets off the bed and goes around the bed, then up buttons the checkered shirt and takes it off slowly because of the cast and followed by the undershirt he is wearing.  
The white bandage stands out against Ray’s tanned skin.  
“You look nice yourself.” Joel smiles  
“Kiss me then.” Ray smiles back sitting beside Joel.  
His boyfriend turns to him and kisses him on the lips. Joel gets a hold of Ray as softly places him down on the soft yet squeaky mattress, minding the cast and the box of condoms and lube on the bed.  
Ray parts from Joel, looking up at the older teen and asks with a smile. “Want to get this party started?”  
“You know this isn’t a porno right?” Joel asks, grinning as he holds back a chuckle.  
“I know.” Ray chuckles.  
Joel gets off the younger teen and takes off his grey uniform pants and his blue boxers and Ray slowly does the same with one hand to use.  
“Are you okay?” Joel asks, shaking his ankle to get his pants off.  
Ray nods and throws his clothes onto the floor and smiles at Joel.  
“So, am I getting fucked?” Joel chuckles as he gets the last bit of his clothing off and they’re onto the floor.  
“Very.” Ray chuckles.  
Joel gets back on the best and says “I would prefer to be on top but, you’re hurt.” He points to his boyfriend's very bulky cast.  
“How about next time we switch, we’ll take turns?” Ray suggests as he moves out of the way so Joel can lie down.  
“Next time I’m going to destroy you.” Joel says in his best ‘porn star’ voice, but ends up laughing.  
Ray gets on top of his boyfriend and makes a fake moaning noise before laughing and start to rub against his boyfriend, actually making both of them moan.  
“Oh, fuck.” Joel moans.  
That makes Ray grin and continue to do it.  
“You fucking tease, I thought you were supposed to be this innocent ninth grader.” Joel comments before letting out a groan.  
Ray leans in and kisses Joel on the lips to shut him up.  
When they part Joel props himself up and looks down at Ray’s crotch, licking the pad of his thumb before running it across the head of Ray’s cock.   
The younger teen bites back a moan, going weak in the knees.  
“Not so strong now?” Joel chuckles.  
Ray get off his boyfriend, Joel leaning down and gliding his tongue along Ray’s shaft, looking up at the other with a wink.  
“I hate you so much.”   
Joel sits up again and shrugs. “How about you take out that anger?” He suggests, turning around and going on all fours.  
Ray snatches the condoms and the lube. He pulls on the condom with some difficulty, never doing this prior.  
“Um... Joel?” Ray says, which makes the older teen look back.  
“Yeah?” Joel asks.  
Ray goes quiet for a moment before replying, “I don’t know what to do next.”  
“You’ve never watched gay porn before?” Joel asks.  
Ray shakes his head, feeling embarrassed as he cheeks heat up.  
Joel gets off his all fours, turns around to face Ray and purrs as he grabs the bottle of lube. “Let me show you.” followed by him flicking open the cap, puts some on his hand. He makes sure that it gets all over his hand, making it cold and sticky as he slowly puts it on Ray’s condom covered cock. Ray can feel the cold from the lube which makes him shiver a bit but, quickly warms up from Joel’s hand.  
Joel’s grip becomes a bit tighter as he rocks his hand back and forth.  
“Are you trying to give me a handjob?” Ray asks, looking to his cock to his boyfriend.  
Joel chuckles, “No.”  
“C’mon, Joel! Don’t be a jerk.” Ray whines.  
“I could jerk you off?” Joel suggests, chuckling some more.  
Ray gives Joel a look before his boyfriend turns over and goes back to his hands and knees.  
“Do you know what to do next?” Joel asks, trying to hold back another chuckle.  
He isn’t trying to make Ray feel bad, he finds it cute that Ray have no idea what he’s doing.  
“Put some of this cold stuff in your asshole, asshole.” Ray replies as he grabs the bottle.  
Joel relaxes himself as Ray squirts the substance in between his fingers, smearing it around Joel’s opening messily.  
Ray grins daringly and slides a single digit into Joel, the sudden movement surprising the older teen, causing him to let out a less than attractive grunt.  
As soon as Joel relaxes around his finger, Ray slips in two more, Joel tensing up again, forcing himself to quickly recover.  
“You prick.” Joel growls.  
“You said I should take all my anger out on you.” Ray responds, humour in tone.  
Joel’s chest hits the mattress with his ass still in the air and he rolls his eyes at Ray’s comment.  
Ray pulls his fingers out of Joel’s entrance and slowly replaces it with his cock.  
Joel squeezes the pillow and moans into it, feeling a strong discomfort at the lack of preparation, gritting his teeth as he relaxed around the foreign feeling.  
Ray holds back a moan himself as he wiggles a bit, trying to get comfortable, this experience being all new for him.   
He uses his good arm to hold against Joel.  
With Ray’s constant wiggling it causes Joel to groan in frustration, “Ray, fuck.”  
“Oh shit, sorry.” Ray apologizes.  
“It’s fine, are you good now?” Joel asks, continuing his attempts to relax.  
Ray replies “Yep.” Before starting to slowly thrust his hips, trying to be as gentle as possible but, also going sleep because he’s shaking so much.  
Joel gets up onto his elbows and asks “Are you alright?”  
“I… I’m good.” Ray replies nervously.  
Joel comments “There is something wrong, you’re shaking.”  
“Fine, I’m nervous and I really don’t know what to do.” Ray replies, sounding embarrassed and the red on his cheeks doesn’t help his case.  
“Pull out of a second.” Joel says before his boyfriend slowly pulls out of him, a feeling of discomfort flooding through him.  
Joel flips over onto his back, making him wince a bit.  
“Okay, I know this is your first time, it’s the same for me but, I’ve watch a good amount of porn to know what I’m doing.” Joel starts.  
“This really helps.” Ray replies, slowly rubbing himself, a bit grossed out that the now warm lube is getting on his palm.  
Joel gives him a look before continuing “You kind of have to push downward and forwards in order for this to work.” Then makes two of his fingers into an small ‘O’ shape and one finger through the hole between his two fingers and moves it through a bit downward and forward just like Joel said.  
“I think I’m about two fingers, not one.” Ray points out, letting go of his cock and wiping the warm lube on his bare thigh, not making the feeling any better.  
“You get the point.” Joel replies, leaning up and kisses Ray on the neck before turning back over.  
Joel positions himself once more and Ray tries once again taking the advice. He goes forward and downward, slow yet more steady than before.   
Joel’s once satisfied groans turn into moans, with discomfort becoming less and less felt in his body.  
Once Ray feels comfortable, feeling shivers of pleasure running up him through him. He starts to go a bit faster, which makes his partner tense up.  
“Are you okay?” Ray asks, as he kisses the middle of Joel’s back.  
“I’m fine, I promise. I better than okay.” Joel replies, relaxing a bit more.  
Ray leaves more kisses farther up Joel’s bare and scarred back as he starts to go a bit faster, his bad arm kept to his chest while he good one holds the side of Joel’s hip.  
Joel lets out a little moan which find its way into Ray’s chest and flutters a bit, causing the shivers of pleasure to intensify.  
Ray starts to crave that feeling that is rushing through his body and starts to move him hips faster, Joel moaning underneath him, only adding fuel to Ray’s fire that is flushing through his veins.  
Joel is gripping the pillow below him, muffled moans float from his mouth; all discomfort gone and replaced by a rush that he’s never felt before. Now he can see why some people would want to go to porn. Aside from the awkward beginning Joel thinks this is best fuck ever.  
Ray thrust start to become sloppy, Ray biting his lip; moans surfacing from his lips despite Ray trying to keep them shut, the moans intertwined with Joel’s moans. Ray’s nails dig into Joel’s hip as he starts to thrust farther and farther until he hits Joel’s prostate which makes Joel yelp, a quick shiver spiking through his body.  
Ray stops quickly. “Are you okay?”  
“Yeah, I’m good, fuck I am good.” Joel purrs in response.  
Ray quickly goes back to what he is doing, feeling a heat pool in his stomach like melt gold. His pace once again becomes sloppy as the heat travels through his veins which makes his tense up. With a couple more thrusts he comes inside of Joel letting out a long groan, now feeling the sweat that slicks his forehead.  
Joel slumps onto the mattress, his face squished against the pillow as he relaxes.  
Ray slowly pulls out of Joel and wraps the condom in tissue before throwing it away in his trash bin. Wiping his sweat drenched forehead against his forearm, only making the sweat settle there.  
“How was that?” Ray asks with a shaky breath, getting up to pick up their clothes.  
“Like I said before, I’m going to destroy you next time because you did a number on me. You seem pretty unaffected for a guy who just had his first orgasm inside a guy.” Joel replies, draping an arm over his face, his breathing still uneven.  
“Whatever you say, Heyman. Plus, I just want us to be clothed just in case my grandma comes im” Ray chuckles, tossing Joel’s clothes at the other teen on the bed with his good arm.  
Joel sits up and tugs on his clothes as he smiles, “I love you.”  
“I love you too.” Ray smiles back as you pulls on his undershirt, trying not to get his cast covered arm stuck.  
Joel puts the condoms and lube under the bed, far enough so no one could see it at first glance under the bed.  
Once Ray has his clothes on he asks Joel “Want to snuggle on the couch?”  
“Sure, do you want to be the big spoon as well?” Joel chuckles.  
Ray steps closer to his almost clothed boyfriend and smirks “Maybe.”  
Once Joel finishes getting back into his clothes and they both make their way to the living room. Joel lies down on the couch and Ray lies in front of him, almost falling off but Joel wraps his arms around the younger teen and pulls him close, preventing him from sliding.  
Ray grabs the television remote and turns it on before snuggling back into Joel’s arms, closing his eyes.  
Joel moves one of his arms and starts to rub his boyfriend’s cheek with his hand as he closes his eyes as well.  
Ray feels his eyes become droopy and becoming more relaxed against Joel. Seeing Ray become sleepy makes Joel smile and kisses Ray’s forehead as he continues to rub Ray’s cheek. Joel soon finds himself falling asleep while holding Ray.  
The sun fades into night, dark bleeding into the sky as the couple stays asleep on the couch. Even when Ray’s grandma came home she throws blanket over the couple. To Ray, this couch doesn’t seem as tainted anymore, any memories of his father on this couch are now replaced by Joel and him cuddling and fast asleep.  
-  
The next day after school; Ray is filled with excitement. He spends the whole school day thinking about tonight because it’s the night of the dance. When Joel went home last night Ray asked his grandma is she could iron his button up shirt.  
When he gets home he sees the shirt laying on his bed, which to Ray is now tainted with memories of the previous afternoon.  
“Gracias, abuela!” Ray calls out before grabbing the hanger with the shirt on it.   
He soon seps out of his uniform, throwing the clothes onto the bed, picturing yesterday afternoon which makes his skin flush.  
As he strips from his uniform, thinking of Joel’s eyes on him which makes Ray bite his bottom lip as if it wasn’t chewed up enough as it is already, and feel heat crawling to his face and his cock as more thoughts of yesterday comes into his mind.   
This follows with the question of “What would happen if Joel was here?” which makes Ray’s imagination start to run wild. He bites his lip as he lies down on his bed, on top of his uniform clothes, taking his semi-hard dick out of his grey boxers. Images of Joel sucking the other teen off, running his fingers down Ray’s chest, and the younger teen gripping Joel’s dark hair as his lips work on Ray’s cock. It’s Ray’s hand and his vivid imagination that pushes him to an orgasm and as he lays there, his face severely flushed, and his hand covered in come and he is slightly upset that Joel isn’t there to see what just happened.  
Joel instead is standing in front of the mirror in Kathleen’s bedroom as she puts on his black tie. He stands there as straight as a solider something she compliments him on.  
When she finished she stands back up straight and comments “You look nice.” Before going to night stand and taking out a Swiss Army Knife, looks as it’s been painted over by hand with craft store pain because the black paint coat is chipping away, exposing it’s true red, glossy colour.  
“Oh.” Joel says, eyeing the knife.  
“I’m not going to stab you, it’s to protect yourself incase something happens.” Kathleen explains.  
“Right.” Joel says, feeling a tightness in his chest.  
She hands him the Swiss Army Knife as she explains, “Ray’s family now, maybe not in a legal sense but, you love him and we love him, and because of that we won’t both of your to be safe.”  
Joel looks to her and puts the knife in his pocket.  
“Are you sure I need this, Tex? I might get arrested for having a weapon.” Joel warns, patting at the pocket which the knife is in.  
“Yeah. Just leave it in the car or van.” She shrugs.  
“Thank you again. For everything, I mean.” Joel says.  
“I haven’t done that much.” She points out, getting flustered.  
“Yes you have, you took five fucked up kids, one of which was on drugs. You took us in and you gave us hope and love and a sense of family, something that was ripped away from us. You helped me start to talk, you helped Geoff find his mother, you helped Kara get better after her abusive relationship, you helped Burnie not be a total dick. You’ve been a fucking great mother, I know it’s hard to raise us but, you’ve made us pretty damn level headed, even when everything seemed to fall apart in an instant, and I can never find enough words to describe how grateful I am towards you. You’ve done more than any other adoptive family.” Joel explains, proving his point to her.  
“Well, I didn’t do it alone. Matt helped and you guys too, even though sometimes you do stupid things, you did most of the work; you made those choices to listen to me without me beating you upside the head.” Kathless says, giving Joel a smile.  
That was the thing Kathleen never did, smiling. She rarely smile and when she did Joel and the others tried to capture every detail to remember it because she never does it.  
She pats him on the shoulder before Joel leaves the room, closing the door behind him, and going to the front door.  
He finds Matt waiting at the door, which his shoes and jacket on.  
“C’mon Joel, doesn’t that dance start soon?” Matt asks.  
Joel quickly puts on his black sneaker before leaving the house with Matt, Burnie yelling goodbye as the pair leaves the house.  
Matt drive to Ray’s house in the black car, Joel noticing that Matt cleaned the interior leather of the car. When they get into the house, Matt parks outside and Joel jumps out and goes to the front door. He knocks on the door and Ray answers it, his face instantly lighting up.  
“Hey.” Joel smiles.  
Ray wraps his good arm around Joel’s neck and says “Hey, Joel. I’m so excited for tonight.” Smiling at his boyfriend.  
“Same here.” Joel smiles back as Ray lets go.  
Joel can hear footsteps behind Ray, Joel looks over to see Ray’s grandma, wearing her pyjamas. The older teen waves slightly, letting go of her grandma.  
She gives him a smile and says “Gracias, por favor tener cuidado de Ray esta noche.”  
Joel looks to Ray and he translates “Thank you, take care of me tonight.” The older teen looks back to her and she’s still smiling at him.  
She walks to Joel, Ray moving out of the way and she wraps her old arms around the teen, holding Joel close.  
“Eres como un segundo nieto, usted es famili ahora.” She says, holding him close.  
Joel looks to Ray and sees that his boyfriend with a large grin and the happiness in his eyes. She must’ve said something really nice.  
She lets go of him and places a hand on Joel’s cheek before simply saying “Tratar bien a mi nieto.”  
Joel looks to Ray. “Tell her yes.”  
“  
Sí.” Joel replies, nodding in agreement.  
She takes her hand away from his cheek, she turns to her grandson and they say their goodbyes before she enters the house once more, closing the door behind her.  
“What did she say before, the reason why you were grinning?” Joel asks opening the door the leads outside for the both of them.  
“She said you’re like family now. She approves of you, after everything it makes you and I feel like this relationship is going to last a very long time and that makes me happy.” Ray explains, exiting to the outside.  
Joel leans in and places a small kiss in between Ray’s brows. As Ray walks down the steps Joel gets a good look at what he’s wearing, a white dress shirt and a tie but, his tie is red instead of black like Joel’s tie. Other than that, they are dressed similarly.  
As they approach the can Joel says “I didn’t know that our colours are red and black.”  
“Well it is the school colours.” Ray points out with a smile as he opens the door to the car and goes inside.  
Joel gets in the passenger seat and Matt drives off to the high school where the dance is being held. Matt soon arrive in the parking lot, and parks in front of the school then turns to Joel and asks “Got your phone?”  
“Yeah, also this.” Joel replies, then taking the Swiss Army knife out of his pocket.  
“What the hell?” Matt asks, moving back in his seat.  
“Tex gave it to me to make sure nothing else happens.” Joel replies, putting it in the cup holder.  
Matt lets out a sigh and rubs the bridge of his nose before saying “I need to talk to her. Well anyway, have fun tonight, call me when it’s over.”  
Joel nods and says “Thanks, Matt.”   
“No problem, Joel. Also you have fun too Ray.” Matt replies, looking at Ray through the mirror.  
“Thank you, Joel’s… Dad.” Ray acknowledges, not knowing what to call Matt.  
“Just call me Matt, kid.” Matt smiles, looking back to the windshield.  
Ray nods and both him and Joel get out of the car. When Ray goes over to Joel he grabs his boyfriend’s hand as they walk to the school’s front door.  
Before the enter the school Ray comments, “I like Matt.”  
Joel chuckles. “Same here.”  
The dance is being held in the school cafeteria and when they enter Ray can still smell the chicken burgers from lunch. The walls once plain wooden panels now covered with cut out flowers, baby animals and bees. Joel notices that someone purposefully put a cut out bird and bee together.  
They see Burnie, who was helping set up the dance and is now in formal attire drinking water and talking to none other than Gavin.  
The couple goes over to Burnie and Joel bluntly asks, “Burnie, what are you doing with Gavin?”  
Ray lets out a sigh, slightly embarrassed by Joel’s question.  
Burnie looks to Gavin to Joel and replies, “I’m keeping him company till his date shows up, he was helping out.” Then looks to Gavin and asks “What’s his name again?”  
Gavin chirps up, “His name is Dan.”  
“The exchange student.” Joel adds, remembering him from the party.  
Ray crosses his arms and points out “Gavin, you don’t even go here.”  
“We don't have dances at A.H High, they got banned for some reason.” Gavin replies, shrugging.  
Burnie and Joel’s eyes lock with a knowing look. Geoff and his old friends that weren’t any good spiked the punch at the winter dance, the school never traced it back to Geoff but, everyone in the house knows, this is what made Kathleen and Matt makes Geoff become clean because he would get caught next time.  
Joel looks to Gavin. “Hey, Gavin.”  
“Yeah?” The Brit asks happily.  
The words were dancing on Joel’s mouth as he found himself deciding to tell him the words Ryan told him.  
“What is it, Joel?” Gavin asks arching an eyebrow, the happy tone still soaking his voice.  
Joel quickly responds with “I think this is a terrible time, but it’s from Ryan.”  
Gavin’s expression drops and asks “What did he say?”  
Before Joel could respond Burnie smacks him in the side of the head and exclaims, “You’re terrible at timing!”  
Joel rubs the back of his head in pain as he responds to Gavins question “He said ‘Thank you’.”  
Gavin’s expression lightens up a bit and a small smile forms on his face as he nods.  
“I’m sorry, it’s terrible timing. I just remembered.” Joel apologizes, shoving his hands in his pockets.  
Gavin replies “No need to be sorry, Joel. I feel a lot better now actually.” Then gives Joel a quick hug before walking off, seeing Dan by the doors.  
Joel looks to Burnie says loudly, “Ouch!”  
“You are fucking terrible with timing.” Burnie points out, moving closer to Joel which makes the dark haired teen flinch.  
“It made his night better.” Joel points out.  
Burnie chuckles and says “Whatever you say. Also Ray, I like your choice in friends.”  
Ray looks from Joel to Burnie and responds not too sure what to say “Umm... Thanks?”   
‘I’m going to drink out in the back parking lot. I’ll see you later.” Burnie comments before walking off, past the back door of the cafeteria.  
“Want to dance?” Joel asks, taking Ray’s hand.  
As Joel leads him to the dance floor Ray quietly points out, “I can’t dance.”  
Joel stops and replies with a small smile, “It’s okay, I can’t dance either.”  
“Really?” Ray asks, looking to Joel.  
“Yeah, I’m not too good. So do you want to suck together?” Joel chuckles.  
That makes Ray chuckle, pointing out, “That sounds really dirty.”  
Once on the dance floor, Ray notices JJ and Blaine near by, both wearing formal wear, Blaine in a full suit and JJ in dress pants and shirt with a leather jacket on.   
When Ray gets a better look at JJ and sees the smaller teen’s nose against Blaine's shoulder, a mark on JJ’s face that is starting to bruise, looking too similar to what Ray had when he first met Joel. Ray can only guess what they came out and someone wasn’t happy with the news.  
“I’ll be right back.” Ray says, breaking away from his boyfriend.  
Joel nods and Ray squirms past people until he finds the couple.   
Ray eventually get to them. “Hey.”  
JJ lifts his head and says, “Hey.”   
His voice used to hold confidence and sometimes sound snarky, but now it sounds defeated.  
“Are you okay?” Ray asks.  
“To be honest, it could’ve gone worse.” JJ shrugs.  
“My dad punched you out.” Blaine comments.  
“But he didn’t kick you out, that’s all the matters.” JJ smiles, looking to his now official boyfriend.  
“I’m glad that it’s out there.” Blaine chuckles, kissing JJ on the lips.  
Ray finds himself smiling and he feels someone tug at his arm, when he looks over he sees Joel.  
“I didn’t know that you just wanted to see guys kissing.” Joel chuckles.  
Ray sticks his tongue out at him and they make their way to the post they were in before.  
“May have this dance?” Joel asks.  
Ray laughs.“Well, I guess.”  
They starts to slow dance, Ray’s hand locked with Joel’s as his other hand with the cast on is slacked to the side of Ray’s body. Joel has an arm snaked around Ray’s shoulder and his other hand claps with Ray’s as they start to slowly sway in place while slow music plays.  
After a few more songs they become a bit better, using a bit more steps rather than simply swaying.  
“We’re terrible.” Ray whispers in Joel’s ear.  
“Shut up and take in the moment.” Joel replies playfully.  
Under the florescent light of the cafeteria decorated in terrible cut outs, everything seem perfect to them.  
“Use your Latian blood.” Joel chuckles, joking with his boyfriend.  
Ray looks up from their feet to Joel and replies, “I’m shockingly caucasian.”  
This makes Joel laugh, causing them to stop dancing.  
After another song Ray looks around and remarks, “Feels like a low key prom.”  
“Did you just invite yourself to prom?” Joel asks, arching an eyebrow.  
Ray with a soft shrug because he doesn’t want to hurt the stitches on the collarbone and responds, “Maybe.”  
Joel could easily take in the moment forever, memories like these start to play out in his life long after the dance.   
All the memories have in common is that they have Ray in them; just being Ray.   
His Little Fish, the one he saw grow up and sometimes act immature, but would always curl up in Joel’s arms.  
Many months pass and by late July and after a long, exhausting drive to California they all made it; Joel, Geoff, Gus, Burnie, Kara, Griffon, and even Ray. No one’s soul manifested itself in the van and everyone made it there alright, except for Gus who puked almost exactly at the state line between New Mexico and Arizona.  
When the school year ended they graduated, and everyone deciding to just stay in texas for a bit longer and just go on a trip to California.   
Ray made it honor roll and JJ passed his classes he failed the previous year. (Thanks to Ray.)  
Ray’s dad got put away for assault and a couple of weeks after that Ray got his cast off and the stitches settled.   
Blaine's dad became angry over his son’s sexual orientation, but accepted him when he found out that the football team didn’t give a damn about what he did. Some were a bit confused by it, however Blaine played well on the team, and that was all that mattered.  
When the date for the trip to California came closer, Joel and Ray asked Ray’s grandma if her grandson could go with Joel and his “family”, she of course said yes and even helped her grandson packed as if she was ready to throw him out but, she was just happy that she was becoming closer with his boyfriend’s family. Ray assures that the longer him and Joel go out, the more and more she wants them to get married.  
Everything seemed to fall into place and now Joel finds himself on the beach, everyone on their towels, drying off from a swim in the waters and playing with water guns they brought.   
They watch others start to pack up for the day while they sit there watching the sun go down, drinking bottles of Coke filled with rum, Ray getting his own alcohol-free bottles, all marked with his name in Sharpie on it, none of them wanting a drunk Ray on their hands.   
Even Ray not wanting a drunk Ray.  
They joke and drink and eat crappy beach food while the sun drips down into the sky.   
Ray will remember these moments like he does the scar on his collarbone from the stitches.   
Joel lies there on his blue towel, with a lazy arm around Ray as he helps Kara and Griffon make a sandcastle with no way to wet the sand but they are still trying.  
Joel looks to Ray, even now, after months of going out and everything they have done to others and each other, they are still close.   
Even miles away from Texas and far away from home, it didn’t really matter to Joel where they were at any time, near or far; Joel will always look after his Little Fish.  
The End


End file.
